LNH: Leadership Cry.sig: Net.ropolis 2023 #5

[Drew Nilium]

On 4/7/23 1:55 PM, EDMLite wrote:
<snip>
> The door to Ultimate Nina’s office surged open – an all-too-common
> occurrence these days – and Nina was surprised to find herself
> hoping for the welcome distraction of a planetary invasion,
> accidental awakening of some elder god, or super-villain in a snit.

You know, understandable

> Cynical Lass drew a deep breath.  “I’m hoping I can help you, sir.
> Ma’am,” she corrected.  “With this election.  As your campaign
> manager.”
> 
> Ultimate Nina sighed.  When were the villains going to rise up off
> their collective keisters and attack?

X3

> “I don’t need a campaign
> manager,” she said.  “Or a campaign.  The LNH will choose the
> person they believe is best qualified to lead.  If it happens to be
> me, I will continue to do the job as best as I am able.”

Oh, Nina.

> “You poor, sweet, deluded…Sir!” Cynical Lass mumbled, as
> Ultimate Nina shot her a look that, had it arrived several decades
> earlier, might have done much to delay the advent of global
> warming.

XD

> “Have you seen what they’re saying about you on
> social media?  ‘Why does she wear a mask?’  ‘What does
> she have to hide?’  ‘Is she still afraid of the Sabretooth virus?’
> Never mind that you’re a ninja… and half the Legion wears
> masks anyway…”

Yeah, that sounds right. x-x

> It’s just… I don’t recall that we’ve
> ever even met before.  What makes you think I’m the best
> person to lead the Legion of Net.Heroes?”
> 
> “Because you actually care about the job.  And about the
> Legion,” Cynical Lass said, her voice rising.  “Because
> right now, everywhere, around the world, good people
> are giving up on politics.  On democracy.  And when that
> happens, the only people left who will be willing to lead
> are demagogues – or power-tripping functionaries, like
> that Pragmatic Reasons Lass.  Or worse.”

Mmmmmm. *nodnods*

> “Someone is holding a press conference in front of
> LNHQ,” said Sister State-the-Obvious, popping her
> head into the office before disappearing again.

X3

> “I’ll close the blinds,” said Ultimate Nina, rising from
> her chair.  “Wait…,” she said, staring at the
> well-dressed man behind the podium.  “Is that…?”
> 
> “Hexadecimal Luthor!” gasped Cynical Lass.

holy shit X3

> “I thought he was… missing… on prehistoric
> Earth since the end of Beige Midnight,”
> Ultimate Nina said.
> 
> Cynical Lass and Ultimate Nina looked at each
> Other.
> 
> “Comics,” they both groaned.

XD XD XD <3

> “What’s he saying?” Cynical Lass asked.  “I
> don’t suppose you can read lips?”
> 
> “I can,” Ultimate Nina said.  “Or I could just turn
> on the radio.  Since, you know, it’s a press
> conference.”

XD

> 
> “Mr. Luthor!  Mr. Luthor!  Jennifer Crenshaw,
> Net.ropolis Observer.  What makes you think
> you’re qualified to lead the LNH?”
> 
> The two women in the leadership office
> looked at each other.

yessssssss omg

> “Well,” Hex Luthor said, his mellifluous voice
> coating every syllable like honeyed butterscotch,

ooooooh, adjectives :D

> “I did serve as President of the Loonited States.
> As a matter of fact, I wouldn’t be surprised if a
> significant number of Legionnaires voted for me.
> And would do so again.”
> 
> Everyone in the crowd turned to look at one of the
> LNH members filling the sidewalk in front of the
> headquarters building.
> 
> “What?” Bad Judgment Boy said.

Oh my god, of course. :3

> But I just heard she’s been using a
> private server to send out her emails!  A private
> e-mail server!  Is that really the kind of person we
> want leading a massive, unlicensed army of
> super-powerful vigilantes?

X3

> “Oh, Miss Overstock.  I was never a villain to
> begin with. And the idea that I would bear some
> kind of grudge against the Legion of Net.
> Heroes just because they abandoned me to die
> in the Cretaceous Period?  Simply absurd.  Of
> course, if I was a member of the LNH and
> had the purely ridiculous idea that I was cooking
> up some kind of scheme to destroy them all,
> well then I might just go ahead and vote for me,
> just to keep a closer eye on what I’m doing.”

omfg

> Cynical Lass turned from the spectacle outside
> the window to look at Ultimate Nina, still
> composed as ever but clearly deep in thought.
> 
> “Now do you want my help?” she asked.

Delightful. n.n

> –Rob Rogers
> –Easily-Discovered Man Lite of the LNH

Thank you so much. X3

Drew "whew, all caught up" Nilium