LNH20: Post-Metal Doomcore #1 [corrected]

[Drew Nilium]

On 1/24/22 10:43 AM, Jeanne Morningstar wrote:
<snip>
> Netropolis. Once upon a time, less long ago than it seems, there were heroes here.
> 
> The last few years were a grand battle between good and evil. The good guys won, 
> but they're gone now. Nothing actually changed, or at least, not for the better. 
> We're still doing our jobs and going in to work every day, but now we have to 
> deal with all these monsters too. We're till trying to get on with the bare 
> minimum of our lives while knowing any minute they could end.

Well jesus. X3 We just got done with one pandemic metaphor!! (technically we are 
not done yet, don't @ me)

> "What's it going to be today, Emily?" I asked myself, fiddling with my 
> old-school lesbian rat-tail as I look in the mirror. "Am I going to go outside 
> and deal with the monsters, or stay inside and deal with the depression?"

You know, I was thinking. X3

> I look at the books and tarot decks piled up by the mirror, the little Ultraman 
> aliens sitting on top of them, and the little cars that I keep around for 
> giantess fetish videos, which is where most of my money comes from these days.

Well that's cute.

> I 
> make weird fetish videos for the internet, which is a side hustle for being a 
> tarot reader, which is a side hustle for grad school.

Oh god, I'm so sorry. X3

> I study the history of Netropolis through the lens of architecture. I don't 
> always like living here, but my life is so tied up with this place that I can't 
> imagine living anywhere else.
> 
> All cities have a life of their own, but Netropolis is something else. People 
> have noticed how the buildings tend to slowly grow back after a disaster, or 
> change themselves when no one is looking.

Yesssss I love Netropolis :D :D :D

> The problem with being inside is that I'm stuck alone with my thoughts, and 
> they're bastards. I'd had enough of them.
> 
> I decided that today I had to go outside.

YEAH!!!

> My plan was to go to the grocery to stock up on fresh vegetables and then stop 
> by the library to get the last volume of Immortal Marvel Zombie Lad.

Heeheehee

> Grocery shopping went as usual. I handed my stuff off to the cashier and we both 
> blinked and sort of barely acknowledged each other's existence.

At first I read this as "we blinked in and out of existence" which wouldn't be 
out of place in this story I feel. X3

> What I saw was a horse whose skin seemed to be made out of bone-white chitin. A 
> horn protruded out of its head, and two fangs from its mouth. A vampire unicorn. 
> A vampiricorn. Or something. And it looked hungry.

oh my god X3;;;

> My ex-Catholic ass was not carrying around any crucifixes, 
> holy water or anything else you'd kill a vampire with. Would that even work on 
> an unicorn?

XD <3

> A yellow taxi cab roared up to the curb. "Get in the car!" someone shouted at 
> me, and under the circumstances I wasn't going to say no.

I just hope it's not a MEGA.

> Sitting at the wheel was a 
> gorgeous woman--yes, I was thinking about that even as a monster was trying to 
> eat me--

You know, relatable

> "I'm Jessica Hernandez, the world's greatest cab driver! From Ultimate Mercenary 
> v20 #5! Remember me?"

...oh my GOD X3 Well clearly I do!!

> The taxi robot's arms ripped the monster in half. Its flourescent pink blood 
> splattered over the streets.

Jesus. D: Well I guess that fits with the sword-and-sorcery tone0

> "Eh, it's a living." She pressed a button and the robot ka-chunk-whrred back to 
> a taxi cab, and we drove home while Little Busters played on.

Hell yeah \m/

> I had planned on actually being productive today, but no dice. Still, at least I 
> could go home, sit down and relax, be alone for a while now that I could really 
> appreciate it...
> 
> I opened the door and there were four anime girls sitting on my couch, eating 
> pizza. I blink, close the door, open it again, rub my eyes to make sure.

eeeeheeheeheehee X3 <3 <3 <3

> "OK so, uh, is this a dream or what?"
> 
> "That's an interesting philosophical question," said elven woman. "I'll admit 
> the concept of reality doesn't seem to be very solid to me lately."

Relatable

> "A monster? Where?" said the demon girl.
> 
> "I'm afraid she's dead now."
> 
> "Fuck and damn."

This is so weird, I love it. X3

> Notes: Still pretty exhausted with work and the effort of finishing THGJE, I 
> wanted to write something that would take less effort to write and read, and 
> keep the LNH20 fires stoked.

Drew "will have to write another one, unless someone else gets to it first" Nilium