LNH/LUNA: The Liminals #8: Motivationquest part 3: Guilty Feet Ain't Got No Rhythm [2/2]

Drew Nilium pwerdna at gmail.com
Mon Dec 14 22:41:50 PST 2020

On 12/14/20 4:23 PM, Jeanne Morningstar wrote:
> Jeanne groaned, pressed deep into the ground of Hell by the Shoe Devil's attack. 
> With the lack of motivation they were finding it harder to fight, move, harder 
> even to breathe.
> "Jeanne!" heard a rather familiar, very cute voice in the distance.
> "Drew?"

Awwwwww. >#>

> "Yeah, I know. I can't help you directly, but I can give you a boon. See?" They 
> waved their Knitting Needles of Continuity and intoned "Boon, boon, booooooon!"


> A glowing boon symbol appeared in the shape of the rainbow UCX icon Drew uses on 
> all social media.


> Jeanne touched it and was infused with holy ununnilic 
> power!

I have to steal that word

> "I get it now," said Jeanne. "I may not have enough motivation on my own, but I 
> don't have to be on my own! I have Drew, I have other friends and people I rely 
> on, and we can draw on each other! Everyone who writes or comments is helping!"

yessssssss :D

> Jeanne resolved to give Drew some nectar the next time they saw them, or maybe 
> some comics.


> They leaped up into the air, spun around, shifted their weapon back into 
> swordmode, slashed at the Shoe Devil with their sword, and kicked it in the 
> face. "HELLFIRE KICK!" they shouted. A burst of pink fire shot out of their feet 
> as their kick landed.


> With their burning chain they traced the shape of a heart 
> bound by a crown of thorns with a flame above it--the Sacred Heart--in the air. 
> "HELLBOUND HEART!" The heart burst in and struck the Shoe Devil right in the 
> face. "LOVELY!" it screamed.

yessssss :D :D :D

> Jeanne made a triumphant pose, and then keeled 
> right over. Having made their finishing move, they were finished. The Shoe Devil 
> was still there, though its flames were starting to sputter.


> "You are nothing more than insects," said the Shoe Devil. "And I am the shoe 
> which will crush you to oblivion!"
> "Yeah, well, I'm going to leave a nasty stain that will take forever to clean 
> off!" said Manga Girl.


> "I'll finish you before it takes too long. I have to make some trade 
> negotiations with Net.phisto at four, and well, frankly I'm hoping I can skip 
> that, but I'm getting bored enough with this fight i'd rather be at a meeting." 

Wow, harsh, you don't gotta be like that dude

> The others were all holding back now. They were worn down, but Manga Girl only 
> seemed to be growing stronger and stronger. The divine creative energy that had 
> been held inside her was rushing out all at once. No one else could keep up with 
> her, not even Net.Access--in her magical girl form, she wielded divine power, 
> but Manga Girl *was* divine power.

ooooooooh. :o I see!

> Her body began 
> to expand, her muscles growing larger and more powerful, her flesh began to 
> twist and bubble and shift. When she was doens, he was a towering, muscular, 
> satyr-like figure with hairy on her legs and back. Goat-like horns jutted out of 
> her head. There was a huge, unblinking eye on her chest and others on her arms

daaaaaaaaaaamn :o

> "Hahahahaha! Fool! You have unleashed the true depths of my power! I am--DEVIL 


> "Uh," said the Shoe Devil. For the first time, his smarmy confidence had been 
> dented just a little.


> She was mutating. As the fight went on, her body was stretching out more, drawn 
> with scratchier lines and there were progressively more and more eyes on it.  
> Everyone knew that the battle was now between the two of them, and the others 
> would be lucky if they survived, whoever won.


> He knew he could not 
> shift the plot or move out of it; this was something that had been built into 
> his character arc for a long time. He could picture the moment before it 
> happened, and even as he was fighting against it with all his might he knew it 
> was no more possible to move out of the way than to stop the rising of the sun.

Ooooooh, yeah, damn. Relatable.

> "Wait just a minute," said the Shoe Devil, as he gazed into the layers of the 
> narrative. "So... you're fighting me and you're fighting in the LNHQ *at the 
> same time*... in an issue that was actually posted a while ago... and it's not 
> even clear where on the timeline it takes place? That does it. Get out of here. 
> And you can have your motivation back, I don't care."

X3 <3

> As they shot up from Hell, the hellfire burned away at them like a space craft 
> in reentry. Jeanne held out a force bubble to shield them from it, shivering and 
> screaming, holding it together even as the hellfire caught ahold of them and 
> they started burning.


> "Hnng. I'm never doing that again," said Jeanne, pulling themself up off the 
> sidewalk. They looked like a gnarly Todd McFarlane-style revenant, a walking 
> corpse barely held together by force of authorial will, with patches of hellfire 
> bursting out of their body.  But they were, more or less, alive.

Holy cow.

> But Manga GIrl was still transforming. "Please..." she growl/whimpered "...help 
> me. I can't stop."

Holy cow!!

> Masterplan Lad stood up, swaying on his feet, and touched his Plot Device to 
> her. He knew that in the other story thread the Plot Device had already been 
> destroyed. He knew that if he didn't try to exert his Plot Device, there was a 
> chance he could still hold it together, but if he used it to draw away her 
> excess creative energy, it would shatter to pieces.
> He didn't even hesitate.


> "No," said Maria. "No."

I disagree

> The violet energy left Manga Girl's body and was drawn into the Plot Device like 
> lightning. It silently crumbled away into dust. Masterplan Lad fell to the 
> ground. He was pale and tired, only inches away from death.

aaaaaaaaaaa so good

> "Of course." Jeanne let out a deep sigh. "Now I have to deal with being a 
> fictional character on top of everything else."

I know right

> This was the 
> cosmic authorial aspect of Jeanne, who everyone immediately thought of as "The 
> Morningstar." Like a certain other cosmic entity of that name, they resembled 
> David Bowie a bit, but more the Ziggy Stardust/Aladdin Sane version than the 
> Thin White Duke one.

Oh lovely.

> "I can," said the Morningstar, "but there's a cost."
> "You don't have to give me that cornball speech about magic and narrative cost," 
> said character!Jeanne. "I remember. I wrote it." [Hungry, Hungry Sabertooths #6]


> The Morningstar nodded. "To save MPL, you will have to give up your own 
> authorial power. You will be completely separated from me and exist as a 
> character in the story."

Dun dun dunnnnn!

> "Well, it beats dealing with the academic job market." Jeanne laughed.

I mean, valid.

> "Well, I got a motorcycle out of the deal. That's something, I guess... wait, 
> why is my symbiote suit PINK?"
> "Well," said the Mornignstar, "Drew's costume as Writer's Block Person is 
> purple, so since they're purple you have to be pink, by the laws of anime 
> lesbianism."

Yessssssss. :D

> "But Drew is much more the pink girl in personality terms and I'm more the 
> purple girl."
> "I know, I know," said the Morningstar, "you'll have to ask WBP why they're 
> purple when you meet them, OK." And with that, they were gone.

 >:3 <3 <3 <3

> Then they heard the chittering of kiwis. A patrol of power armored kiwis marched 
> in toward them. After Alice tried to explain the situation but really couldn't, 
> they performed first aid and got the bodies of MPL and Manga GIrl on stretchers. 
> The kiwis bore them into the LNHQ, with the two net.heroines, the ex-writer, the 
> trenchcoater and the ostrich following silently after.

Ah man, gotta figure out where this part goes on the timeline...

> Sheet music: the legendary "butt song from Hell" from Hieronymus Bosch’s Garden 
> of Earthly Delights. 
> [https://news.artnet.com/art-world/bosch-butt-song-from-hell-309732]
> "Capacious pockets": a phrase often used to describe the Fourth Doctor's pockets 
> in Terrance Dicks's novelizations.
> The Discalced Carmelites: an order of Catholic nuns that is a branch of the 
> Carmelite order, following its' founders original vow of poverty, including not 
> wearing shoes. "Discalced" is Latin for "without shoes."

Love it.

> Next: The battle with the Shoe Devil is over. Who will survive, and what will 
> they become?

Drew "dun dun dunnnn!" Nilium

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