REPOST: RAC Challenge! #14

[Drew Perron]

On 11/3/2015 9:15 PM, Arthur Spitzer wrote:
<snip>
> Chapter 14: Sing a Song of Six Packs

Man, I forgot how *long* this series went.

>     While seemingly half asleep, Dirk Darrenger, formerly known as
>     Paragon, the Ultimate Man, was actually in sheer ecstasy. This simple
>     act of brushing his teeth without having some super powered villain
>     crash through the wall to stop him was sublime.
>
>     When finished, he shuffled over to the loo and did something else he
>     was never able to do without being interrupted.

Heeheehee.

>     Standing on the other side was a large, muscle-bound man in black
>     spandex and an iron helm that resembled a skull. A big silver skull
>     was emblazoned on his chest.
>
>     "Paragon, the Ultimate Man, I am Enthropy. I destroy worlds in my
>     wake. I shall destroy you and your puny planet!!!"
>
>     "Sorry," Dirk said tiredly, "I'm retired."
>
>     "Oh." The severe look dropped from Enthropy's face. "I guess I'll just
>     head back home then. Good bye!" He disappeared in a poof.

Pffffft. XD Perfect.

>     Mary Lu Retina ran and ran and ran. She ignored all the shouts of
>     "Run, Forrest, ruuuuuun!" coming from people she passed.

DAMN YOU 1995

>     "You've never hear of me, and there's a reason."
>
>     "You're a nothing nobody?"
>
>     "No," he said patiently, "I'm an abandoned character, and I'm looking
>     for revenge."

GASP. :D Metafictions!!

>     "That's enough out of you," the man in the white robes growled. "One
>     more word and I'll have an Omega limited series written about you. And
>     you knows what happens to them."

XD XD XD

>     Bob began pacing back and forth. "You see, Dirk, we of People
>     Respecting In-Continuity Karacters, or PRICK, have been watching you
>     and yours tearing through the very fabric of reality just to continue
>     a storyline. It disturbs us deeply.

Yesssss. :D

>     "A few PRICKs and I have decided that this must stop.

*snerk*

>     "We're giving you a chance to live, Dirk. Welcome to Providence, Rhode
>     Island. See that moody looking young man walking down the street? He
>     is Matthew Rossi III. Kill him, Dirk, and you'll be free of anything
>     weird ever happening in your life again and reality will be kept
>     safe."

:D :D :D The terrible ridiculous metafictions and the silliness, I love it so much

>       * Next issue: Chapter 15: "Don't Be A PRICK" by Matt Rossi

Drew "still trying to remix this into something that feels right" Perron