[LNH/ACRA/WRIMO] Anal-Retentive Archive Kid: A Judicious Use Of Overkill #1

Saxon Brenton saxonbrenton at hotmail.com
Mon Nov 1 19:20:58 PDT 2010

[First off the rank?  Well, yeah, but mainly because it's already the 2nd Nov over here.]
Anal-Retentive Archive Kid: A Judicious Use Of Overkill - part 1
A Legion of Net.Heroes miniseries for the Raccowrimo writing month
Written by and copyright 2010 Saxon Brenton
     Wendle Johnson was keeping busy.
     He was determined to avoid both despair or self-pity, and unlike a 
lot of Ame.rec.ans who baldly claimed that they wanted smaller government 
and then whined incessantly about how the government had to do something 
to help when tragedy befell them personally, Wendle wasn't interested in 
laying blame so that he could angle for a payout.  Currently he was 
immersed in a project for his university course.
     "Hey, Johnson!"
     He looked up from the notes he was preparing.  There was a group of 
three other students across the lawn from where he was sitting.
     "God gave you AIDS as punishment!  Accept Jesus or rot to Hell, pagan!"
     None of which was to say that Wendle wasn't willing to collect intel 
on possible religious terrorists.
     His eyes narrowed as he took careful note of who they were.  Now, 
maybe he was overreacting.  Perhaps it was the case that he was still too 
sensitive over the issue.  Possibly a more realistic stance would be that 
most loudmouthed bigots were all talk and no action and there was no need 
to keep tabs on them in preparation for when they build up the guts to try 
to glass you in the face.
     But the simple fact remained that when the alien troll known as the 
One Man Abusive Reaction had used its psychic powers to stir up irrational 
hatred across the planet a scant month ago, it had been a Christian who had 
stabbed Wendle with a HIV infected needle - and Wendle wasn't feeling 
particularly forgiving just yet.
     And even if he was overreacting, Wendle had read Sun-Tzu and knew that 
ignoring an enemy was not prudent.  "The art of war teaches us to rely not 
on the likelihood of the enemy's not coming, but on our own readiness to 
receive him."
     He looked his watch.  Yeesh, where did the time go?  He gathered up 
the papers into his backpack and headed off.
     Elizabeth Greenvale was at home, and was expecting Wendle to arrive 
within the half hour.  She had most of the slood turbulence statistics 
that they needed, and all that was needed now was a few hours to finish 
correlating the data and calculating the distribution curves.
     There was a heavy knock at the door.  "Coming," she called.  "There's 
no need to bash the door down."  But before she had made it even halfway 
across the room to the entry the door was kicked in by some beefy Asian 
men dressed in suits and sunglasses.  Elizabeth stopped and stared at them 
in shock as they aimed their guns at her.
Character credits:
     Everyone here created by me.
Author's notes:
     This was written as part of the Raccowrimo project, which is a 
rec.arts.comics.creative specific variant on the annual National Novel 
Writing Month (NanoWriMo).
     Specifically, this story has been on the backburner as a planned 
subplot in _Limp-Asparagus Lad_ for several years.  For those who are 
interested in the continuity, the antics of the alien troll O.M.A.R. took 
place back in the _Flame Wars 4_ crossover event for the LNH which was 
published back in 2002-2003, and afterwards Wendle took time off to visit 
his father in the _Limp-Asparagus Lad Special_ #1.  So, yeah, it's a bit 
far back in continuity.
     Elizabeth Greenvale appeared once before in _Limp-Asparagus Lad_ 
#51-54 during the Shimbleshanks arc.
Saxon Brenton   University of Technology, city library, Sydney Australia
     saxon.brenton at uts.edu.au     saxonbrenton at hotmail.com
"These 'no-nonsense' solutions of yours just don't hold water in a complex
world of jet-powered apes and time-travel." - Superman, JLA Classified #3

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