8FOLD/CONTEST: Journey Into... # 8: Brave New World, With Such Awesome In It!

Andrew Perron pwerdna at gmail.com
Sat Jan 2 09:01:15 PST 2010

On Thu, 31 Dec 2009 06:52:47 +0000 (UTC), Tom Russell wrote:

> Also: the legs are too short, the center of
> gravity too low: the Gene Kelly of robot horses.

Heh heh heh.

> It has been hanging here,
> undisturbed, since the museum was rebuilt following its destruction by
> Gregory Dingham back in the spring of aught-five.


> Three years of petitioning, fund-raising, political strong-arming, and
> reconsideration-of-forensic-evidencing later, the Gelding was cleared
> of all wrong-doing and Hamoody Strange's death was ruled a suicide.

Now I'm wondering what the death was. (Could-- no, no, "gelding".)

> He daydreams wildly and
> ecstatically about the Gelding waking up and, knowing that its master
> is still dead, attempting to shut itself off again, only to be
> stopped, stopped by Smith, Smith who brought him back, Smith who gives
> him a reason to live again, Smith who will be his new friend, his new
> master, his new rider, and, oh, what grand adventures they'll have,
> Palmer Smith and the Grey Gelding, oh yes he can see it oh yes oh yes
> he can. It is as clear as a memory.

Oh my.  Yes, we can see the outline of the story from here. (That said, the
focus on the Gelding's own adventures was an unexpected bonus!)

>    "This is Doctor Fatima Tarif," says Sam. 


> Enchanted by the woman he conjures before
> him and moved by her revelation that she does not flirt with him
> because what she feels for him is real, he becomes lost in a romantic
> daydream divorced of its initial autoerotic purpose, an idyll that
> only concludes when he tucks his unspent penis, who he calls Gerald,
> back inside his pants with a mixture of anger (a wasted opportunity!)
> and relief (perhaps what he feels is also real?).

Gerald. XD (Also wow, right into the masturbation there!)

> But part of it is something harder to quantify: a sense of discovery, of
> exploration, and-- though his programming, as far as he can ascertain,
> does not contain any algorithms for it-- yes, optimism.  Optimism,
> despite Palmer Smith's warnings.

Woo!  Forward, the future!

>    The second man pipes up again: "Evolution of funk, maybe."
>    The others stare at him.
>    "What?  I read that somewhere.  I don't really hear it myself,
> but... oh, never mind."

I'd argue the true evolution of funk is actually techno!

>    The Gelding points his head at the small box in the man's hand, and
> is about to ask, when the man answers: "This is a Zune."
>    The other young men start cackling like mad.
>    "Shut up.  You all shut up."

XD Now, now, we have to be tolerant of the trademark-ridiculousness

>    "I'm sorry if I gave you that impression, Randy, but I can assure
> you that I see nothing wrong with you being a homosexual.  My creator
> was also a homosexual, and I was never quite able to comprehend why he
> was so often made to feel shame, so often afeared for his life and
> reputation, so desperate to keep his romantic entanglements a secret,
> so often unhappy and anxious when he was in love."

Ah, interesting...

>    "My creator has been dead for several decades, and have been
> dormant for roughly the same period of time.  I take it from the
> frequency of the quote sermons unquote that you have received that,
> and please correct me if I am wrong, but that the same prejudice
> against homosexuals persists in this brave new world of Funk and
> Zune?"


>    "I don't mean to play the braggart," says the Grey Gelding, "but I
> can achieve a consistent speed of thirty miles per hour without
> endangering my rider physically."

*Indiana Jones music*

>    "I had assumed he was Irish," says the Gelding.

Bwahaha!  Naturally.

>    "This world is sick, Palmer.  And it's just going to keep getting
> worse.  You were born too late.
>    "You missed the golden age."

Ironyyyyy!  When it cuts like a knife~

> This is for High Concept # 5, the "Anachronoid"-- that is, an
> artificial being that gets shuts down before World War II and comes
> out after the war-- supplied by Dave Van Domelen.  I liked the concept
> a lot, as it provides me with an opportunity to look at one of my big
> thematic hobbyhorses, nostalgia, from another point of view.

Hmmmmmm, yes.  One of my favorite things about nowadays is that we seem to
have woken up to the possibility of picking and choosing the best of the
past, not just unconsciously through nostalgia and rejecting the previous
generation's rejection, but by conscious and free choice.  The Archive
Factor is a big part of this.

(And I find it interesting that nobody explored the possibility of the
anachronoid waking up after WWII but before the present day.)

> This means, of course, that I
> ended up cutting the promised "Barack Obama riding on a robot horse".
> My apologies.

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, too awesome for this world.

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