Superfreaks/ACRA: Superfreaks #18

Martin Phipps martinphipps2 at
Wed Dec 6 07:05:39 PST 2006

Michael King, Mary Jones and Frank Lopez: crime scene 
investigators.  John Phelps, Mark Johnston and Tom 
Jackson: police officers.  Jack Greenspan and Edward 
Bailey: medical examiners.  Alan Russell and Cliff
Murdock: lawyers.  These are the men and women who are
truly our last line of defense.  But what about the
capes whose cases they have to investigate?  Should
they be considered a help or a hindrance? 

                    SUPERFREAKS #18

                    REVENGE RELOADED

                        PART I

December 23rd, 12:01 pm

  "Here's the cake!" Jack Greenspan announced.
  "Finally!" Mary Jones said.  "I'm really hungry!"
  Jack took out a scalpel and started cutting the
  "Hold on," Edward Bailey said.  "Is that the same
knife you use to do autopsies?"
  Jack frowned.  "It's one of them.  Why?"
  Edward turned green.  "That's really gross."
  "It's a sterile instrument!" Jack insisted.

12:04 pm

  "Michael, I'm sorry," John Phelps said, "but there's
been a stabbing and they need a CSI on the scene."
  Detective Michael King nodded.  "I understand."
  "We'll save same cake for you," John promised.
  "Thanks," he said with a smile and then looked
around for Frank Lopez.  "Frank!"
  "Come with me on this case.  I need somebody to take

12:49 pm

  "What's the situation?" Michael asked.
  "The victim is right over there," Officer Mark
Johnston said.  "He's been stabbed."
  There was a dead body covered with blood.  Standing
next to Officer Tom Jackson was another man who was
also covered with blood.
  "Who's he?" Michael asked.
  "He's the guy who did it," Tom told him.
  "Are you sure?" Michael asked.
  The accused nodded.
  "Wait," Michael said quickly.  "What's your name?"
  "Fred Michaels."
  "Fred, why did you nod just now."
  "Because the officer is right.  I did it."
  "Oh thank God," Mark Johnston said.  "We can go now.
 Maybe there's still some cake back at the precinct."
  "Not so fast," Michael said.
  "Michaels here just confessed," Tom pointed out.
  "That's right," Michael said, "but since when does
the guilty party confess.  Usually when somebody
confesses it means he's covering up for somebody
  "But I really did do it," Fred insisted.
  Michael ignored him.  "Did you read this man his
rights?" he asked Mark.
  "Soon as we got on the scene."
  "Did he understand his rights?"
  "He didn't start blabbering until you got here on
the scene," Tom said.
  "But your boss asked me a question," Fred said.
  "You had the right to remain silent," Michael told
  Fred looked confused.  "But then you wouldn't know
what happened."
  Michael smiled.  "Trust me.  I'm going to figure it
out."  He turned to Mark.  "What did you see when you
arrived at the scene?"
  "When we got here, the victim was already dead and
the accused here," Mark said pointing to Fred, "was
standing over him holding this knife."  He showed
Michael a plastic bag with a bloody knife in it.
  Michael nodded and looked at Fred.  "It looks bad
for you."
  "I know."
  "But I've been trained to not just accept what seems
obvious right away.  I've been trained to uncover the
  "But I really did do it."
  Michael sighed.  "Alright.  Show me where you were
standing when you stabbed the victim."
  Fred looked at Tom who then turned to look at 
  "It's okay, Tom.  He's not going anywhere."
  Fred walked over to where the body was.  "I stood
right here he said."
  "How were you holding the knife?"
  "Like this," Fred said as he mimed the attack.
  Michael walked over.  The angle of Fred's thrust was
consistent with the wound to the victim's stomach. 
Michael then examined Fred's clothes.
  "Hmm.  It looks like arterial spray."
  "Excuse me?"
  "Blood.  All over your stomach.  But not over your
  "Right," Fred said.  "But look at my arm."
  "Okay," Michael said.
  "You did it."
  "Finally!" Mark said.  "Can we go now?"
  "Wait!" Michael said.  "We haven't established
  "I just didn't like the guy," Fred said.
  "That's good enough for me," Tom said.

6:50 pm

  "Are you trying to poison me, Thelma?"
  Thelma Ladd closed her eyes, took a deep breath and
asked, "It's there something wrong, Larry?"
  "Something wrong?" Larry asked.  "When is there ever
something right?  In the fifteen years we've been
married have you ever cooked a decent meal?"
  "I thought that was you favourite."
  "It is when it's done right."
  Thelma sighed.  "I'll get you something else then,"
she said, taking his plate.
  "What are you going?" Larry asked.  "I'm not
finished eating that!"
  Just then, there was an explosion outside on one of
the fields of the farm on which they lived.
  "What the hell was that?" Larry asked.
  "Why don't you go take a look?" Thelma asked.
  Larry sighed.  "Always me.  Larry, take out the
garbage.  Larry, go check on the explosion outside. 
Why don't you ever get off your fat ass and do
  "Alright," she said, reaching for the rifle.
  "Hey, don't touch that," Larry said.  "That's _my_
  Larry made his way outside and walked over to the
field where the explosion came from.  There he found
neither a cratar nor a fire nor smoke nor any
indication that there had been an explosion at all. 
All he found was a man wearing black spandex.
  "Who are you?" he asked.  He then raised his gun and
pointed it at the intruder.  "And what are you doing
on my property?"
  "I am Zon... from Neon," Zon said.
  Larry assumed a sarcastic expression.  Apparently he
hadn't heard of Zon from the last time he came to
Earth.  "Nanu nanu?" he asked.
  Zon used his eyebeams and vaporized Larry Ladd on
the spot. 

                        PART II

December 24th, 10:54 am

  FBI Special Agents Lana Lewis and Oscar Unger were
sent to the Ladd farm to investigate Larry Ladd's
  "Please tell us what happened, Mrs. Ladd" Agent
Unger said.
  Thelma Ladd nodded.  "We were having dinner when we
heard the explosion outside.  Larry went outside to
see what happened."
  "We saw no evidence of an explosion," Agent Lewis
pointed out.
  "Alright then, we heard a big bang, whatever it was.
 Larry went outside to see what it was."
  "What was it then?" Agent Unger asked.
  "Like I said, it sounded like an explosion."
  "Go on," Agent Lewis said.
  "So there was this man dressed in black spandex and
he was talking to Larry."
  "What did he say?" Agent Unger asked.
  "I don't know.  I couldn't hear them.  Then these
beams came out of the man's eyes and Larry
  "Disappeared?" Agent Unger asked.
  "Uh huh."
  "Then he flew away."
  "You don't believe me?"
  Agent Unger bit his lip.  "Mrs. Ladd, this is what I
think happened: your husband left you."
  "And you called the FBI because you want us to go
look for him and bring him back."
  "That's not true!"
  "But you see, Mrs. Ladd, you're actually a lot
better off without him.  I mean, really, Mrs. Ladd,
look at this place!  Was your husband really a good
provider?  Now, look at you!"
  "Oscar..." Agent Lewis started.
  "You're still young... ish.  I'm sure there are
plenty of guys who would..."
  "Oscar, please!  Can we talk outside?"
  Agent Unger sighed.  "Excuse me."
  Agents Lewis and Unger went outside.
  "What is it, Lana?" Agent Unger asked.
  "It sounds like Zon."
  "What sounds like Zon?"
  "Her mystery man.  Remember?  He tried to take over
the world a month ago."
  "Yeah," Agent Unger said, "and Extreme defeated him.
 Sent hi to the Twilight Zone."
  "Dimension.  Twilight Dimension."
  "Whatever.  He's gone.  All that means is that Mrs.
Ladd saw Zon on TV and that's where she got her idea
for a flying man in black spandex who shoots eye
  Just then Agent Lewis' cell phone rang.  "Wait."
  "Agent Lewis, did you have your cell phone on during
an interview?  You know that..."
  "Yes.  Okay.  I see."
  "Okay, what's going on?"
  Agent Lewis smirked.  "It's Zon.  He's back."

12:01 pm

  "Excuse me?"
  "I'm Janie Leland, reporter for WXPT News here in
  Zon sighed.  "Tell me, Miss Leland, why I shouldn't
kill you now for approaching me without permission."
  Zon shook his head.  "Kneel before Zon."
  Janie took a quick look at Zon's crotch, the
contours of which were clearly visable thanks to his
tight spandex costume.  "That's... very tempting...
but we're on TV."  She pointed her microphone at the
  "Oh I see," Zon said as he looked into the camera. 
"People of Pepperton, I mean you no harm... as long as
you do as I say.  Bring me Extreme!"

12:05 pm

  >>Extreme, you must kneel before Zod!<<
  Kenneth Clark had been watching the TV in the Daily
World news room.  He then turned to his colleague
Wendy Wang.  "Cover for me."
  "What do you want me to say?"
  "Tell them I had some of the pasta salad and I
needed to go to the bathroom to throw up."
  She nodded.  "They'll believe that."

12:54 pm

  "Is there no one here who will face me?" Zon asked.
  "I will, Zon!" Extreme said.
  "Ah, good, you're here."
  "You caught me by surprise before," Extreme said,
"but I'm ready for you now."
  "Are you?" Zon asked.  "Are you really ready for...
all of me?"
  Just then, from out of all the buildings around them
flew countless clones of Zon.
  "The people of this planet are not the only one's
who know how to make clones!  I commissioned all my
conquered worlds to produce clones of me so I could
bring an army to defeat you!"
  Extreme instinctively spun around and created a
vortex.  The strong winds knocked the Zon clones back
the way they came.
  Zon grimaced.  "More."
  More Zon clones flew down from the sky and landed on
Extreme.  Emboldened by their brothers' apparent
success, the Zon clones who had literally been blowed
away also piled on top of Extreme.
  "Finish him!" Zon screamed.
  But Extreme simply stood up and the various Zon
clones that were on top of him were thrown aside. 
Extreme then grabbed one of the Zon clones and spun
him around and used him as a weapon to knock down the
other Zon clones like they were bowling pins.
  "You can't win!" Zon said.
  "You're right," Extreme said as he threw the Zon
clone he was spinning at Zon himself.  Extreme then
flew away before Zon could regain his bearings.
  "You're a coward, Extreme!  The son of Myk-El is a

                         PART III

1:05 pm

  "Did you see the news at noon?" Cliff Murdock asked.
  District Attorney Alan Russell shook his head.  "No,
  "Extreme just got his ass handed to him by Zon."
  Alan sighed.  "That's the problem with relying on
capes," he said.  "You're perfectly safe until someone
stronger comes along."

1:58 pm

  "Ah, Extreme," Zon said, "I see you're back for
  "I am," Extreme said.  "And I'm not alone."  Behind
Extreme were his clones Eliminator, Reject, Bizarre
Extreme and Extreme Junior.
  Zon looked at Reject and grimaced.  "The people of
this planet have a long way to go before they perfect
their cloning technology."
  "They'll do," Extreme said.
  "We'll see."
  So the battle continued with five Extremes facing
countless Zons.
  "We will destroy you all!" Zon promised.
  "Need help?" somebody said.  It was The Super
Soldier.  He had Amazing Woman, Mr. G, the Human
Spider and Weapon Alpha with him.
  Extreme nodded.  "Stay away from Zon himself," he 
warned them.  "He's too powerful.  The clones would
pretty much be push overs if not for the sheer number
of them."
  "Thanks for the tip," Super Soldier said as he
barrelled into a bunch of Zon clones.  He found that
the Zon clones were indeed weak enough to be hurt by a
human being, or at least a human being at peak
physical condition.  Amazing Woman followed suit while
Mr. G tried taking them on one by one.  The Human
Spider, meanwhile, encased dozens of them in his
webbing while Weapon Alpha popped his claws and
started rending limps from any and all Zon clones not
quick enough to not be able to get away in time.
  "You still have to face me!" Zon said.
  "And face you I shall," Extreme said, "but not
  Just then, Zon found himself unable to move.  "What
have you done?"
  "It's not me," Extreme told him.  It was Scott Grey
who was using his power, from a safe distance away, to
slow down time to render Zon helpless.
  "NO!" Zon screamed.
  "YES!" Extreme said with satisfaction.  Extreme
pummelled the helpless Zon with enough punches of such
force as to render him too weak to move, assuming he
had been free to move.

2:15 pm

  "That's it," Extreme said.  "That's all of them."
  "Are you sure?" the Super Soldier asked.
  Extreme nodded.  "Near as I can tell, they were all
programmed to attack me and/or defend themselves.  If
they've stopped coming after me then we can assume
they're all finished."
  "So what do we do with them?"
  Extreme grimaced.  "It would be nice if we could
send them all to the Twilight Dimension."
  Weapon Alpha's claws were still extended.  "The
other option would be to chop them all into little
  The Super Soldier shook his head.  "We can try
imprisoning them in fallout shelters.  They'd be able
to escape from most prisons by just busting through
the walls."
  "We'd still need to use extra care with Zon himself.
 He's a lot stronger than any of his clones."
  The Super Soldier nodded.  "Maybe for once the local
authorities will extend us a bit of leeway and allow
us to deal with something our own way."

11:55 pm

  "It's almost Christmas," Mary said.  She and Edward
were at her apartment watching _It's a Wonderful Life_
on TV.
  Edward nodded.  "Were you hoping for anything
special?" he asked.
  Mary smiled at gave Edward a hug.  "I have all I
ever wanted right here."

                         THE END


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