LNH: Classic LNH Adventures #315: Leadership Crisis Part Three
Arthur Spitzer
arspitzer2 at gmail.com
Sun Jan 21 13:16:26 PST 2024
And we're back in the past and can check the eyrie archive
once again.
You'd think this would be in the Ultimate Ninja or LNH Series
folder, but nope -- it's here in Misc folder:
https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/lnh/Series/Misc/
So, here's the Leadership Crisis crossover with Martin Phipps's
LNH Series and Raymond "wReam" Bingham's Ultimate Ninja series
(with some behind the scenes editing work by Todd "Scavenger"
Kogutt)!
And now LNH v1 #19 by Martin Phipps! Will Old Comics Man rant
about fountains and how it was much better in the old days when
you had to drop a bucket in a well to get a drink and hope that
bucket was attached to a rope or else you would be really
screwed?! And Deja Dude for LNH Leader?! What could possibly
go wrong with that idea?!!
Find out in...
_
| | Classic
| | =
| | ____ ____ _ ____ ___
| |__ | [] | | [] | | | | [] | | _ \
|____| \__] \__ | |_| \__/ |_|\_\
||
|_| OF NET.HEROES
ADVENTURES #315
=====================
Leadership Crisis Part Three
=====================
Legion of Net.Heroes -- Net.ropolis 90210
The splash page shows Doctor Stomper, Super-Apathy Lad, Procrastination
Boy, Sidewinder, Bad-Timing Boy, Irony Man and Deja Dude in the pizza
parlor that is down the road from Legion Headquarters, the Pizza Pit.
"So Ultimate Ninja didn't believe you either?" asked Bad-Timing Boy.
"About us facing off against the Brotherhood of Net.Villains."
"No," answered Deja Dude, "in fact he found the whole story rather
amusing."
"It's too bad we couldn't prove that it happened," observed Irony Man.
"Yeah," agreed Deja Dude, "when I told him about how we were at their
hideout, he asked me where it was." Deja Dude took another bite out of
his slice of pizza. "So I said it was somewhere on the other side of
the world and he almost burst out laughing," he said and shrugged his
shoulders.
"He should trust us," said Bad-Timing Boy.
"He expects us to trust him," noted Sidewinder.
Doctor Stomper finished chewing and swallowed. "That isn't his way,"
he explained. "Ultimate Ninja was a loner before he joined the Legion.
Seemed to me that he sought leadership before anybody could assume
leadership over him."
"Some attitude," said Sidewinder.
"Yeah, right," said Irony Man.
"Deja Dude, why don't you run for leadership?" asked Bad-Timing Boy.
"Me?" asked Deja Dude with his eyes open wide and his free (unburdened
with pizza) hand on his chest.
"Sure! Why not?"
Deja Dude shook his head. "I think we should support Ultimate Ninja."
"You do?" Bad-Timing Boy asked incredulously.
Deja Dude nodded. "Would you question Rebel Yell's decision to
appoint him as acting leader?"
"And what if Rebel Yell decides to make it permanent?" asked
Sidewinder.
"In that case, whoever sought leadership would want his support."
They all looked at Deja Dude; all except Super-Apathy Lad, that is,
who kept on eating.
"I don't mean me."
"Of course you don't," said Sidewinder with his head tilted ever so
slightly.
Deja Dude tried to change the subject. "Say, Procrastination Boy, how
did that exam go?"
"I'd rather not talk about it," said Procrastination Boy dryly.
"This is really good pizza," said Irony Man.
"Yes," said Doctor Stomper, "we came here once before with Squid Boy
and Parking Karma Kid." Sidewinder began to look uncomfortable. "That
was when we were ambushed by Manga Man. We probably would have died if
not for Cliche Du--"
"Say, how come we don't see much of those two anymore?" asked an
embarrassed Sidewinder.
"Oh, they're taking turns dating Bandwagon Chick," explained
Procrastination Boy.
"*Both* of them?"
"They don't seem to mind."
Sidewinder was about to say something when Irony Man interrupted.
"That was back in the early days of the Legion, right?"
"That's right," said Doctor Stomper, nostalgically, "before there was
any talk of leadership or traitors."
"Is everyone from those days still in the Legion?" asked Deja Dude.
"Let's see: Loquacious Lad left to go into politics; Kid Yesterdaze
left for medical reasons. Apart from that, yeah, we're all still here."
They all finished eating. Then came the moment of crisis.
"Who wants the last piece?"
In the lobby of Legion Headquarters stands Old-Comics Man and
Bibliography Boy.
"Who's idea was it to put in a fountain? In the old days we didn't
have fountains! We didn't have receptionists either! For that matter,
we didn't have private lives at all! We were too busy fighting
villains! That was our choice! It was our sacrifice! We were real
heroes, not the bunch of --"
"Yeh, yeah, yeah," interrupted Bibliography Boy, "but it isn't as
simple as that: you see, one writer decided that Legion Headquarters
would have a front door and, as with any other large building, the front
door would lead to a lobby but then another writer decided that if
Legion Headquarters has a lobby then it must look like a hotel so now we
have a fountain and a receptionist and, seeing as how their presence
doesn't invalidate anything that happened before, I guess were stuck
with both of them."
Just then, Captain Cleanup arrived and walked up to the receptionist.
"Thanks for the help, Sis. You can go home now if you like."
"No problem, Bro'!" Captain Cleanup's sister picked up her purse,
said "Bye!" and left.
"Then again ..."
In the Monitoring Room, Pliable Lad speaks to Multi-Tasking Man.
"So, is it true you spend all of your time here?" asked Pliable Lad.
"That's right," answered MTM (*not* Mary Tyler Moore), "except when I
go to the bathroom. Of course, there was one time when I played poker
with Yell and the others but that was when I was being done by a writer
who didn't know any better."
"When do you eat?"
"Oh, List Lad brings me something every once in a while. He's good
that way."
"Must get lonely sometimes."
"It's OK."
"I get lonely sometimes."
MTM eyed Pliable Lad suspiciously.
"It's about Panta."
"What about her?"
Pliable Lad's head and shoulders drooped. "I'm scum."
"I don't follow you."
Pliable Lad sighed and straightened himself. "Well, she and Lost
Cause Boy were, well, kinda close. If he hadn't sacrificed himself to
save us all, they probably would have got married. Well, now he's dead
and I've been, well, looking at her." His voice trailed off.
MTM stopped doing all four things he was doing. "You haven't been
talking to Self-Righteous Preacher about this, have you?"
"No."
"Well, good. So, tell me, have you any reason to believe Panta is
interested in you?"
Pliable Lad didn't answer.
"OK, let's assume she is." Pliable Lad perked up a bit at the thought
"Causie is dead and we can't bring him back. Do you expect her to mourn
for the rest of her life?"
"No."
MTM nodded. "I think she'd appreciate some support right now."
"Yeah, I suppose she would!" declared Pliable Lad who now seemed ready
to take on the world. "Thanks!"
MTM smiled. "No problem."
"You know, I'm surprised that somebody who spends all his time with
computers would know how to relate with people."
MTM went back to work.
"Did I say something wrong?"
In the Central Command Centre, Ultimate Ninja and Obscure Trivia Lad
awaited the arrival of Kid Kirby.
"Kid Kirby, sit down," Ultimate Ninja said, pulling out the chair next
to him.
"But that's where Continuity Champ used to sit."
"Continuity Champ is dead," said Ultimate Ninja trying to remain aloof
"Please, we have things to discuss." Kid Kirby sat down. "Myk-El
informs me that people are unsure about my about my ability to lead."
OTL and KK looked uncomfortable. "Look, UN, they might not be
questioning your judgement as much as your authority. It may just be a
matter of winning them over."
"Obscure Trivia Lad agrees."
Ultimate Ninja nodded. "Well then, when we uncover the traitor, we
might have *both* problems solved."
"So you think there really is a traitor. I mean --"
"Oh, I'm sure! In fact, I'm quite confident we'll know who it is soon
and when we do, they'll all know that Ultimate Ninja is not to be
underestimated."
==========
Next Week: Leadership Crisis Part Four!!!
==========
Arthur "Same Classic Channel. But Same Time? Probably not." Spitzer
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