LNH/LNH20: The Liminals #9: Motivationquest Epilogue: After the Ordeal

[Jeanne Morningstar]

THE LIMINALS
#9: "Motivationquest Epilogue: After the Ordeal"
A last epilogue for the road by Jeanne Morningstar

====

A FEW DAYS AFTER HUNGRY, HUNGRY SABERTOOTHS! #50

"I can't believe it," said 
Always-Seems-Powerful-On-His-Own-But-Gets-His-Ass-Kicked-in-Crowd-Scenes 
Boy, lying on the hospital bed "I got my ass kicked *again!*

"I'm sorry," said Dr. Bad-Bedside-Manner, unconvincingly.

"I mean, look at me," he said. "I *do* win fights when I'm on my own. I 
really do. I beat Acton Lord once! Well, maybe it was Action Lord. Well, 
maybe it was a Space Dvandom disguised as Action Lord. The point is. The 
point is! I *am* powerful on my own, but the Writers never use me for 
that! They always just put me in crowd scenes! Where I get my ass 
kicked! Why?"

"I'm sorry," said Dr. Bad-Bedside-Manner, "but your name is 
Always-Seems-Powerful-On-His-Own-But-Gets-His-Ass-Kicked-in-Crowd-Scenes 
Boy. There's not much I can do about that."

The LNH medbay was packed full after the battle with Reagent Omicron. 
Its medical staff were stretched thinner than Laffy Taffy, not the least 
because no one had ever come up with a named member other than Organic 
Lass and Doctor Bad-Bedside-Manner as far as the present author can 
remember. But things were slowly but surely turning around.

Masterplan Lad had woken up.

He slowly blinked his eyes. "I suppose I'm going to have to get used to 
this."

Standing over him, he saw Victoria.  "MPL? You're OK?"

"So it would seem. I assume we won?"

"Yeah. We barely survived, just like we always do. How are you feeling?

"...completely helpless, to be honest. By the end, I felt utterly lost 
in that enormous battle."

"Nah," said Victoria. "I can't say I understood everything that was 
going on in that fight, but I know you helped. You directed the flow of 
Drama, I guess, and that helped you recover. You put energy in the 
system for other people and then that gave you some back. That's how 
it's supposed to work."

Masterplan Lad nodded.

"Well, I hope I never have to keep track of that many characters again," 
he said.

"Mm, I dunno about that. Seems like there's always another event around 
the corner. But I'm going to assume after writing that last issue, the 
Writers are as tired as we are."

"Where's Alice?".

"Probably checking out another dimensional anomaly somewhere. There's 
been a whole lot of weird metaphysical energy zapping around. Always 
takes the universe a bit to settle down after a crossover, so I hear."

"Indeed. And Sakura?"

"She's... getting better. Her magickal energies have stabilized since 
the fight. It's been hard because Occultism Kid is... gone? Or 
something? Again, a lot of that crossover went way over my head." She 
mimed a whooshing motion. "But it seems like she's coming through OK--"

"Victoria!" Sakura tackled her like a cat.

"Hey! You're back!" said Victoria.

"Yep! Good as new. Doesn't seem like there's any long term bad effects 
from, uh, that. I was told that the fact I gave myself a name actually 
helped, made me more stable or something. And you thought it was too 
silly!" She stuck her tongue out as Masterplan Lad.

"No, nothing is too silly for this universe. I'm learning to accept 
that.... Where's Maria? And my Writer?"

"Maria... There's been no sign of her since we brought you in here. 
Sorry.  And the last I heard, your writer is with..."

In a burst of light, Alice, still in her magical girl costume, appeared. 
She powered down. "Hi folks! Sorry, it's been a bit. First, I had to 
drop our Writer on Earth-20–travel between that world and ours is still 
kind of difficult, because of, ah, I guess that story's still not 
finished yet, [See just imagine--which we may actually do this 
year!!!--ed.] but I could send them there even if I couldn't go through 
myself. They said they figured there were enough Ghost Rider type 
characters in this universe, and they'd work better in that one, 
especially since they sent its Legion off into space so it needed a few 
more heroes back on Earth..."

"And there's a Drew there. More than one, even." Manga Girl giggled.

"True. And after that, I kinda got sidetracked. I had to check on a 
potential dimensional anomaly in the Omegaverse..."

"The, er, what," said Masterplan Lad.

"The... what?" said Victoria.

"Oh my god!" said Manga Girl. She put her hand over her mouthed and 
started laughing.

"Yeah. You know, the Omegaverse. The universe of the now defunct but 
influential ~serious RACC imprint Omega."

"Alice... babe..." said Victoria, "The internet has changed a lot since 
1997."

"Oh... right." Alice laughed nervously. 'Well, it looks like the 
Liminals are... not exactly back on our feet, but we're all awake."

"If questionably so," said Masterplan Lad. He reached out for his Plot 
Device, then remembered. "Ah. This will take some getting used to as well."

"Yeah, what happened in that last big fight?" said Manga Girl. "I heard 
you were kind of... directly manipulating the Dramatic energy of the 
Looniverse, without the Plot Device?"

"Yes. It was... difficult. Exciting and terrifying. I'm experiencing my 
body, my power, the nature of the story I'm in very differently now. And 
I... hmm."

"Yeah?" said Manga Girl. She perked up. No doubt she'd guessed at some 
of what he was thinking.

He was still afraid, wanting to step away from the precipice he was one. 
But one day he had to get it over with, and it was better to do it now, 
in a post-crossover "quiet issue" like this one where there weren't too 
many unnecessary plot complications in the day.

"After my... near-death experience and the Catalyzation Wave, I've 
had... certain realizations about myself. I... am not a cis man." The 
others fell silent and turned to listen.

He went on: "I've always felt disconnected from the body and identity I 
was expected to assume. I'd been familiar with the concept of dysphoria 
and believed it didn't apply to me because, for one thing, it doesn't 
normally apply to cosmic beings, and for another thing, I didn't feel 
that this idea of being 'trapped in a wrong body' described me. My body 
wasn't wrong, it just... wasn't me, exactly."

He took a deep breath. "I've always felt this pervasive sense of 
disconnection from myself that I've never questioned because it always 
felt like just the way things were, part of the ordinary pattern of 
life.. I've come to realize that following the Order's teaching was 
keeping me from fully exploring the potential of who I am. I've been 
thinking about this kind of thing for... a while."

He looked up at the ceiling. "For a long time, I truly believed in the 
Knights Temporal's teachings, not insincerely as many of its leaders 
did, but with all my heart. I believed our cause was necessary, and I'd 
seen evidence for it. In my time in the Knights's service, I saw so many 
horrors. Worlds wrecked by narrative chaos and unmediated Drama. I saw 
realities where time and space were torn apart. I saw Retcon Screamers 
rising up from the rips in realities stretched to breaking by 
contradictory storylines. I saw the Incoherent Writer Man rain down 
Magic Fruitcakes from the sky."

He took a deep breath. "But now, immersed in this world and the absolute 
nonsense that makes it up, I have come to see that I was wrong. That the 
Knights Temporal, through their rigid approach to reality, created their 
own monsters. There's still so much I don't understand about this world 
and my place in it. About who and what I am now. But... I'm learning to 
live with that, slowly. At any rate..."

He looked back at his friends. "At any rate, for now, I'm going to 
say... I am nonbinary. I suppose I can start using they/them pronouns to 
see how it feels."

"Good," said Victoria. She was smiling more than she'd done in a long 
time. The others nodded along.

"I still don't entirely know about my names--though I decided some time 
ago that my middle name is Xauriel, though I still can't say I'm 
entirely sure even of that. 'Masterplan Lad' doesn't fully feel right 
anymore, but I haven't found a name that does. I'd like to have a first 
name that allows the underlying pun in my name to work, but haven't 
fully decided yet--"

"Can we call you Dee for now?" said Manga Girl.

"If you must." They relaxed a little. "I have to say... I'm a little 
worried. The way things are right now, this doesn't seem like a very 
good time to experiment with being trans. The current Writers being what 
they are, I'm sure they'll nullify the current wave of anti-trans 
bigotry in the Looniverse, as they did the pandemic, but... I don't 
doubt it'll leave its mark on me in some form, just as the pandemic did. 
You know, after September 11th, Self-Righteous Preacher successfully 
convinced the RACCtre to undo the effects of the attacks [See 
Limp-Asparagus Lad #55--Footnote Girl], but the Bush-era comic tropes 
that came from them still affected the Looniverse through Beige 
Countdown–the registration act and so forth. I worry we'll be going 
through something similar."

"Maybe," said Victoria. "I don't know what to say other than... You get 
used to it." She sighed.

"And we'll be fighting for you every step of the way. Don't forget 
that," said Alice.


"And can I paint your nails?" said Sakura.

"Yes... Although I was... going to see Maria about that at some point."

"Awww," said Victoria. "And you're going to have to get more clothes 
than just the one suit, y'know."

"Yes... yes." They let out a deep sigh.

"Don't worry!" said Alice. "We can help."

"That's good to hear," said MPL. "I would like to experiment with 
different kinds of clothing, but... Women's fashion is a completely 
alien language to me No one could ever mistake me for a magical girl, 
I'm afraid."

"Well," said Victoria, looking back on their hair which had got long, 
floppy and tousled while they were recovering, "right now you look 
pretty Cure." She ruffled their hair a little.

"Ha ha ha."

"Hey, sorry about this, but I gotta run off for a sec," said Sakura. 
Demigod business."

"OK, see you around." Victoria waved goodbye as Sakura dashed out of the 
room.

===

As a divine being, Sakura Mangas could sense certain powerful and 
distinctive magical presences. And she recognized the one that was 
standing on the street on the other side of the LNHQ.

"Maria!" she shouted, waving. "Hi!"

"Gah!" said Maria, looking around herself hurriedly. "Oh, it's you."

"Yep! It sure is. There a reason you're lurking around here?"


"None that's any of your business." She pulled her trenchcoat around her.

"OK, be honest. Did you come to visit MPL?"

"...no."

"You didn't want them to see you while they was conscious, did you?"

"...."

"You saw them earlier and it sounds like that went pretty well."

"Yeah, well. I–wait, them? Ha, I figured." She smiled widely.

"Yeah, they just gave a big long speech about that. It was really nice. 
You should've been there."

"Not in *there*. I didn't think they'd want a trenchcoater like me in 
the headquarters of the world's most famous net.hero team. 
Self-Righteous Preacher'd skin me alive."

"Nah. I'd kick his ass. That's kind of what he's there for, narratively 
speaking." Sakura reached out to pet Sunny the ostrich, who, 
surprisingly, let her.

"Wait, they're letting you do that? Jeez. That's a whole other level of 
superhuman power."

"Guess so!" she said. "So, do you wanna go in and talk to them now?"

"I will. Later."

"OK. One last question. Do you want to join our team?"

"Do I... what?"

"Want to join our team!" Manga Girl pointed her finger in the air.

Sunny chirped.

"I... why the hell would I do that? I'm a trenchcoater. Someone who 
walks in the shadows, the hidden places in the world full of 
unimaginable wonder and terror. I walk alone." It seemed like a 
well-rehearsed speech, which she said in a very matter-of-fact way.

"Didn't there used to be a whole brigade of you guys?"

"Yeah, OK," she said, "but I'm not a net.hero and I'm sure as hell not 
an LNHer."

"Well, you don't have to be! Not all of us need to be LNHers. Kinda like 
Dvandom Force--they had some people who were LNHers and some who 
weren't. Like Rotanna. You've heard of her, right?"

"Oh yeah, definitely," she said. There seemed to be a faint tinge of 
embarrassment--probably a formative crush that helped her figure out she 
was a girl or something like that.

"The Limnals, and I quote, move between the heroism of the LNH and the 
uncanny strangeness of the Lunaverse. So, whaddya think?"

"Do you really want me around?" said Maria. "Do you know what 
trenchcoaters are? I'm one of the broken and the damned. I'm not good 
for the people around me."

"Hmmm," said Manga Girl. "I've noticed you kind of do the thing of... 
aestheticizing your own flaws and issues as a person and making that the 
core of your identity instead of trying to deal with them."

Maria's jaw dropped.

"Oh, whoa, I didn't mean to roast you that hard. I'm sorry."

"Yeah, well," said Maria, "you're right, but I can't afford therapy. 
That's what I got."

"The LNH has free therapy for all its members, y'know."

"No way in hell I'm ever joining the LNH, sorry. But... I'll see you 
again. Maria out."

And she mounted her ostrich and raced off into the warm Net.ropolis evening.

====

Dee Xauriel McKenna (?)--Masterplan Lad, guardian of the narrative; 
Victoria Arden--Forsaken Lass, survivor of Limbo; Alice 
Ashdown--Net.Access, champion of crossovers; Sakura Mangas--Manga Girl, 
synthetic senshi of creativity; and Maria Hart, troubled trenchcoater, 
along with her ostrich familiar Sunny!  They are four young net.heroes, 
one trenchcoater and one ostrich who fight to understand themselves and 
the worlds they inhabit, moving between the heroism of the LNH and the 
uncanny strangeness of the Lunaverse--the Liminals!

====

THE NEXT DAY

Masterplan Lad looked in the mirror, carefully applying the dark green 
lipstick to their lips.

They'd been held up from delving into these feelings by one thing or 
another for a very long time, by problems in the Looniverse and the 
forces of Real Life. They were far, far behind where they wanted to be.

But it was a start.

====

BUT WAIT, THERE'S MORE!

EARTH-20, THE MIDWEST

Jeanne Morningstar, former writer and now undead motorcycle-riding 
magical girl champion of justice, stood beside their newly-created 
hellbike and looked down the highway.

It had taken them a while to come up with a good name. For a while, 
they'd been thinking about 'Chainsword Girl.' Bu now that they existed 
in the same reality as Drew as Writer's Block Person, they wanted to 
evoke that kind of toku-y-ness they shared.

And in the 70s there was a short-lived comics character Gary Friedrich 
came up with called Hell-Rider, that was kind of a zero draft version of 
the Johnny Blaze Ghost Rider. And so from now on they would be...

HELL WRITER!

They examined their hellfire motorcycle. "So now I'm a pastiche of 
classic Kamen RIder *and* 90s Ghost Rider. Coooool." They sat on top of 
it. "Well, here goes. CRY FOR THE MOON!" They drove off into the highway 
as a melancholy but funky 70s toku theme played.

The sign on the side, familiar from past road trips, read HELL IS REAL.

"You're telling me, road sign," said Hell Writer.

Then they remembered that in the Real World they had never touched a 
motorcycle in their life.


The motorcycle crashed into the cornfield.

Hell Writer picked themself up and dusted themself off. They'd get the 
hang of this eventually...

====

Next: Every time a bell rings...

Notes:

And thus ends the first "season" of The Liminals. And it only took what, 
five years? Well, better late than never. And honestly this did turn out 
a lot better than what I originally had in mind.

The Hell Writer bit was originally supposed to set up a new series... 
Maybe it will, but I have a bunch of other series ideas I want to get 
into, and started doing other stuff with Earth-20 with Post-Metal 
Doomcore. But I'm definitely doing something with that someday.

MPL, Vic, Maria, Sunny, Hell Writer: me, usable with permission
Sakura: me and Amabel Holland, usable with permissoin
Alice: Saxon Brenton, free for use
Always-Seems-Powerful-On-His-Own-But-Gets-His-Ass-Kicked-in-Crowd-Scenes 
Boy: Marc Singer, Marc Singer, not reserved
Dr. Bad-Bedside-Manner: Peter "Tick" Milan, free for use



-- 
Jeanne "Comrade Bruce Wayne: Gossip Girl" Morningstar
Chief Procrastinator, Commission of Ecumenical Translators

It is a foul bauble of man's vanity. Away with it!
--Count Dracula, throwing a mirror out a window, _Dracula_ by Bram Stoker