LNH: Classic LNH Adventures #108: Just Imagine Saxon Brenton's RACCies! Part Seven

[Drew Perron]

On 6/2/2019 5:35 PM, Arthur Spitzer wrote:
> In this weeks reposting of stuff you can find in the eyrie archive
> https://archives.eyrie.org/racc/lnh/
> we have the seventh section of Just Imagine Saxon Brenton's RACCies!
> 
> Jamie Rosen returns with issue 14.  Wait what happened to issue 13?
> I mean Jamie wouldn't skip issue 13 just avoid all the horrible bad
> luck that would undoubtedly follow him for the rest of his life if he
> were to write it?  Would Jamie do that?  Hmm.

I mean, Jamie *did* disappear not long after this...

> And Drew Perron returns with #15.  Is it time for Shoe Devil to
> cackle the word, 'Excellent!'?  And when is it not time for Shoe
> Devil to cackle the word, 'Excellent!'?

I mean, considering the Shoe Devil hasn't reappeared since the end of this 
storyline...

...wait a minute, *is Jamie Rosen the Shoe Devil*!? *dun dun dunnnnnnn*

> "I -- I can't betray the LNH!" Firewire said.
> 
> "You have no choice," intoned the Shoe Devil. "For you have already
> signed the contract, and right here in section a, paragraph 3,
> subsection delta, it says, and I quote: 'The undersigned does hereby
> agree to betray the Legion of Net.Heroes.'"

*cackles* This is such a good joke.

> "Yes." And with that, the Shoe Devil vanished in a puff of shoe polish.
> 
> "Um, do you want to tell me how I'm supposed to betray the LNH?"
> Firewire asked.
> 
> "I'll tell you later."

Setting up future storylines!

> "It's very easy. And all I need from you is one tiny, little thing.
> Something you'll never even miss."
> 
> "I -- I.... fine."
> 
> "An excellent choice." The Shoe Devil gestured broadly. "Goodbye,
> Never-Gets-Credit-for-His-Dialogue Lad. Hello, Bluetooth!

I love Bluetooth. :3 Jamie was *exceedingly* good at taking these tossed-off 
ideas and transforming them into something great.

> Back on Real Life -1, Saxon Brenton scratched his head in puzzlement.
> Had it all been a dream? The Grapety Purple Man -- the transformation
> into Pointless Awards Man III -- the attempted murder -- had it all
> been induced by that shrimp and crocodile pizza he'd had just after
> midnight?
> 
> And if so... why did his shoes have no soles?

Heeheehee

> "Well, it *is* highly unethical," answered the voice on the other end.
> "And possibly illegal, but I can work around that. Yes, I'll do it."
> 
> "Excellent," PAM II said. "Sacrifice me for the greater good, will
> they? We'll see about that! Little do those fools know, that the very
> man they are counting on to save them -- shall be their undoing!"
> 
> On the other end of the phone, the Lethal Lawyer started the clock.
> "You know this is going to cost you."

Amazing <3

> Manga Man sailed through the net.aether between the newsgroups.  His
> mind whirred, trying to answer the mysteries that had sprung up.  Who
> had created the RACCies virus?  How did the Grapety Purple Man steal
> Saxon from Real Life -1?  Why was his plot-device-sense tingling?  He
> sighed.  Maybe some time in
> rec.arts.anime.mahou-sensei-einstein.creative would relax him.

I want to go back to that as a setting someday. Hell, I want to write an episode 
of this... hmmmm...

> ...or maybe not.  He stared at the whipping wall of flame that divided
> the newsgroup down the middle.  What was this?

In case it's not obvious, every visit to another newsgroup I write is heavily 
influenced by the Limp-Asparagus Lad/Fan.Boy crossover.

> Slowly, he pulled himself out of the crater.  What the hfil was--
> "You!"
> 
> The person in the other crater rose up. "Yes, it is I - Manga Man!"
> He landed in front of our protagonist. "And who, I might ask, are
> you?"

I still think this was a really good idea. :D

> "Indeed," said the Demon On Treads. "How's the fight against the virus
> going?"
> 
> "Eh, we've got it all sewn up," said wReamhack. "Just a matter of
> getting people to update their virus definitions."

And here's me putting the drama back in this part. :D

> "Excellent," cackled the Shoe Devil as he and Bluetooth appeared out
> of the air. "Now, to use the LNH's technology and your demonic
> networking powers to create a wide-area network directly into the
> minds of the people of Net.ropolis!"

This definitely happened offscreen <.< >.>

> (As for the two Manga Men - I noticed a discrepancy between the
> "law-abiding buisnessman" Manga Man from the beginning of the thread
> and the "still a supervillain" Manga Man from later on.  This is a bit
> of a fix on that.)

AKA "hey nerds, I still like this idea >:D"

Drew "neeeeeeeeeeeerds!" Perron