LNH20: Bite-Size Tales of the LNH v20 #20: "Independent Research"

Drew Perron pwerdna at gmail.com
Wed Jan 2 00:27:21 PST 2019

On 12/31/2018 6:00 PM, Arthur Spitzer wrote:
> "Curses!" said a figure that was parked outside of the LNHHQ on a lawn
> chair with a margarita tightly in his hand.  "I was so, so sure that 2018
> would finally be the year that broke Drew Perron.  But no, still writing
> these damn stories.  Still keeping the LNH's damn torch alive.

Awwwww ^#^ FUCK YES I AM!!

> He gave a sigh.  "But I can wait.  For I've waited since the first LNH
> post was ever posted back in 1992.  I have been waiting on the lawn of
> every single possible LNH Looniverse slowly sipping away at this very old
> margarita.  Waiting for the last -- very last story!  And I can keep
> waiting.  For I am," giving a little dramatic pause before speaking,
> "Waiting-For-the-LNH-To-Die Guy!!!!

GASP! My darkest enemy!! >:o

> "Maybe it won't die in 2019.  Maybe not even in 2020.  Or 2021.  But.
> Given enough time -- these writers will eventually get too old to write
> these damn stories.  Too tired.  And after that final LNH story is posted
> -- I'll be there ready to gloat.  Of course you won't be able to read of
> my gloating because there won't be any LNH stories that I'll be able to
> appear in -- so you'll just have to imagine it.

GASP. >:o That's an entirely reasonable prediction!!! How dare you!

> Waiting-For-the-LNH-To-Die Guy's phone start buzzing.  "Hmm.  Who could
> that be?  Oh, it's the Waiting-For-the-Superguy-Altiverse-To-Die Guy.
> Hey, WFtSAtD Guy!  Wuzz up?  Enjoying retirement?"
> <<No!! That Eric Burns bastard wrote a bunch of Superguy stuff in 2018!
> I'm still waiting for it to die!!  God, it was so close!!  Damn him!!>>

Oh, man! X3 Wonderful!

> "Well, that sucks.  Yeah, I'm still doing this too.  But eventually all
> this waiting will pay off.  They will end.  I mean the worst possible
> scenario would be having to wait for the Heat Death of Universe.  No way
> they can possibly survive that."
> <<Yeah, whatever.>>

...well that just gives me an idea :D

> Arthur "Well. There's my LNH story for 2018.." Spitzer

Fuck yes! :D Good job getting one in! And thank you for being inspired! :D

Drew "I'm back from vacation and ready to roll" Perron

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