LNHY/REPOST: Death of Trophy Wife #4

Drew Perron pwerdna at gmail.com
Wed Feb 6 07:53:26 PST 2019

"God is dead."

"Actually, he's in a coma." The teenage girl was wearing a black kosode and
hakama, with a white shitagi underneath. Her purple-and-silver hair stood out
in bright contrast, as did her enormous green eyes. Her quill pen flicked over
the clipboard she was holding. "But I understand the mistake; it's hard to
make out details through the divine presence."

"Yeah, well." The young boy knelt to examine the body. He hardly needed to,
being three feet tall. His enormous hair swished in the cosmic winds as he
turned around. "Either way, Shinigami Girl, what are we looking for in terms
of means, motive and opportunity?"

"Hard to say, Dead Boy. It's not often that a deity-class being gets taken
out. At least, when they're not fighting some overpowered ninja." She rolled
her eyes. "Can't believe he wasn't even wearing orange."

When they had found it, the body of God had been three hundred cubits long,
but now, he had shrunk to the size of a normal human being. Shinigami Girl put
on a pair of sunglasses and examined his face. Looked like a normal, if
handsome, human man. Weird. "No visible wounds. No physical evidence left
behind. Where do you even start on this sort of case?"

"Can we check his Handbook entry?"

"Sure, but you know that the Official Handbook of the Looniverse entries for
Cosmic Beings are all fluff and no crunch." Shinigami Girl's hand went
translucent, and she reached gingerly into God's chest, fishing around a bit
until she found what she was looking for.

She pulled out a slightly tattered piece of newsprint and gave it a look-over.
"This can't be right..." She took off the sunglasses and rubbed her eyes, but
the words stayed the same.

"Hmmmm?" said Dead Boy. "Let me see..."

Person Kid
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitz
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
FIRST ISSUE: Young Comics #1

The one who started it all! Person Kid was there at the beginning of Earth-Y's
Heroic Age, bringing together the League of New Heroic Youth. Together, they
ended the Great Depression and stopped fascism around the world. After the
LNHY's battle against The Last Dictator, Greef Graves revealed his identity to
the world and became the First Among Equals of the League of Nations, guiding
Earth-Y into a new age of peace and prosperity. But when Heaven itself called
him to fight the armies of Hell, he left the world behind, rising to an
all-new adventure!

They looked at each other.

"Mother$%^@ing Carrie Fisher," said Dead Boy. "This is way above our pay
grade, you know."

"We get paid?" smirked Shinigami Lass. But her enormous eyes were sober. "I
think we need some history lessons. Time to visit the Before God Guys."

Author's Note: The idea of turning the original Manga Girl and Fuzzboy into
afterlife cops was Adrian's. The characters are Free For Use, as are, I
believe, all of Tom's Classic LNH characters.

Also, relevant reference:

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, retcons retcons dootly doo~


Drew "oh my god this was back when I was still going by that, I Feel Old" Perron

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