8FOLD: Mancers # 6, "Big Scary Brain"
Tom Russell
joltcity at gmail.com
Wed Aug 15 05:56:50 PDT 2018
On Tuesday, August 14, 2018 at 9:07:59 PM UTC-4, Scott Eiler wrote:
> There were a couple of weird things in this episode...
>
>
> On 2018-08-13 07:09, Tom Russell wrote:
>
> > "I am a brilliant genius engineer," mutters Sarah upon waking. She
> > twists her body so that it rests on her left side, enabling her right
> > arm to swing out in search of the pen and paper on her night table.
> > She misses the first time, knocking her alarm clock off the table. It
> > doesn't land with a hard clunk on the hard wood floor, but rather on
> > that pile of papers and books that she really should pick up one of
> > these days.
>
> It's a good waking moment, but it's a weird thing to say to oneself in
> *any* circumstance. Even though you're a game designer and you're proud
> of it, I'll be surprised if you say it to yourself when you awake. And
> modern-day politics have pretty well established, if you *say* you're a
> genius, you're probably not.
Well, it was supposed to stick out a little, especially at the beginning, but I hoped that the context throughout the story - that she's choosing to define herself this way, that she doesn't want to let herself be defined by this occultish stuff that she's clearly terrified of, that she's fighting a sort of inner-battle against it - would make it "click" (that and the fact that she's saying it having woken up with an idea, while she's working on the idea).
But I very well could have fumbled that! Thanks for the feedback.
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