LNH: Classic LNH Adventures #55: Saviors of the NET Part Three

Arthur Spitzer arspitzer2 at gmail.com
Sun Apr 1 14:33:51 PDT 2018

In this weeks reposting of stuff you can find in the eyrie archive
we have the third section of the Saviors of the NET.

For Saviors #4, Mike "Sam Vimes" McMullan returns with some mysterious
shadowy figure.  Is this shadowy figure the real boss behind the Saviors?

And Saviours #5 (Oh my, where did that 'u' come from?), Saxon Brenton joins
the fun with a secret origin of the Gothic Gorilla.  Can Saxon's Gothic
Gorilla origin survive the upcoming add-on chaos?  Probably not.  But until
then enjoy..

And now..

             | |      Classic			
             | |                      =
             | |      ____    ____    _    ____    ___
             | |__   | [] |  | [] |  | |  | [] |  | _ \  

             |____|   \__]    \__ |  |_|   \__/   |_|\_\
                                |_|  OF NET.HEROES

                                     ADVENTURES #55

                      Saviors of the NET Part Three

                              T H E
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         /// \\\\\\\\\ \\\ || || \\\  /// |||\\\         ///
   //////// ///      \\ \\\|| ||  \\\///  ||| \\\\\ ///////

                           O F  T H E

            \\\\\\\     \\\     >>>>>>>  //////////////
             \\\\\ \\    \\\    \\            ///
              \\\\\  \\   \\\    >>>>>       ///
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                \\\\\   \\\\\\\ >>>>>>>    ///

From: "Sam Vimes" <mlmcmull at olemiss.edu>
Subject: LNH: Saviors of the NET #4: Which way is up?
Newsgroups: rec.arts.comics.creative
Date: 9 Oct 1998 01:09:32 GMT

LNH: Saviors of the NET #4: "Which way is up?"

    The dark figure behind the desk addressed three equally dark shapes
before it's desk. They stepped into their respective spot-lights as the
butler motioned them and stood quietly.
    "Gothic Gorilla, Mood Arrow, Captain Killfile," the darkly ambiguous
voice intoned, each of them bowing their heads as they were called,
"Ultimate Savior worries me. The...*boy*...is too powerful." A light
flickered and an image was projected onto one screen; it was a chart showing
what appeared to be Jesse Cashew at different ages, with a power gauge to
the right of each shot.
    "He was powerful enough when he stumbled upon our little scheme," with
this Gothic Gorilla was given a meaningful look, and the other two shook
their heads. He had been assigned to take out the young hacker, but had
failed. "Now," continued the voice,"That our unique aging process has begun
to accelerate he will become less of a problem; it seems that his abilities
have reached their peak at this stage, and will soon begin to decline as he
progresses. Your only job now is to keep his motley...recruits," the word
was almost spat out, and this time everyone looked at Captain Killfile,
whose idea it had been to trick the boy into believing they had a real team,
"Out of the way when I give the word. Adler Stim, a.k.a. Jesse Cashew , is
about to contribute more to our cause than ever before!"
    This comment was followed by a good ten minutes of maniacal laughing
before Mood Arrow piped up: "How's he going to do that?"
    "The best way," replied the darkness that would have given a very
disturbed scary creature man the creeps, "He'll become a martyr!"

Ultimate Ninja looked over the information and shook his head. It was all so
convoluted, almost intentionally so...almost as if someone was trying to
keep revelation after revelation headed their way. There was only one being
with such power, and...he looked up into the space directly between himself
and the ceiling.
    "This had better not be a goddam crossover," he muttered as he walked
out of his office. It was time to get involved, personally. This left
Deductive Reasoning Man sitting there by himself quite suddenly, but he
hadn't exactly been surprised; he too looked up at the same space.
    "Took you long enough to use that little bit of humor," then he left as
well. The room was empty. Well except for furniture, and papers, and the
nice new lamp on the desk. It was a very expensive lamp...


    Very Disturbed Scary Creature Man was lurking again. He had found that
the very act of lurking in the right parts of town almost guaranteed a few
superstitious crook or two to threaten. He grinned sadistically at as he
pictured the collection of snapshots he used to have on his wall at home.
The horrified faces of the store clerk, the bike messenger, his ex-wife, his
dog...it had been his only hobby after he found this suit. Before he met
Adler, that is, the kid was so damned smart, and honest, and dammit all he
had to was *suggest* something and you felt sorry for anyone that tried to
stop him. The natural charisma just rolled off the boy...it was like he
expected so much of people, and they didn't want to let him down...
    VDSCM shook his head as a nagging thought worked it's way into his
consciousness...hadn't he left some criminal or another tied to the side of
a building an hour or so ago?....

    "Several dozen criminals with outstanding warrants in the vicinity of
Buckler and Ethernet were rushed to the hospital tonight after they suffered
heart attacks," It would be reported by a strikingly gorgeous reporter with
too much make-up later that evening, "The reason? Witnesses say it was
caused by what some are calling the most frightening string of swearing ever
heard in this area. Quite an achievement. AVI at eleven."

Next: Tons of cool exciting stuff hopefully written by someone more familiar
with LNH characters!

Mike "Ultimate Slacker" Mc

Ultimate NInja: Ray Bingham
Deductive Logic Man: Not Reserved
The Saviors: Arthur Spitzer/ Not Reserved

From: Saxon Brenton <Saxon.Brenton at uts.edu.au>
Subject: LNH: Saviours of the Net #5
Newsgroups: rec.arts.comics.creative
Date: 28 Oct 1998 21:13:48 GMT

Blue Light Productions presents:

LNH: Saviours of the Net #5
'Spotlight On: Gothic Gorilla'

Written by Saxon Brenton
Art by Sc*tt McCl**d

Cover shows Gothic Gorilla, apparently floating in mid air, making 
magical looking gestures with his hands and causing luminescent spell 
effects to fly off from him. In the background is a montage of faces of 
the Legion and the Saviours which are printed with blue rather than black 
linework so that they are faded compared to the main figure. Along the 
bottom is the blurb: 'Spotlight on: Gothic Gorilla'.

Legion of Net.Heroes Headquarters:
     Librarian Lady left Ultimate Ninja's office.
     Since the current crisis over the 'Saviours of the Net' had erupted, 
those members of the Legion of Net.Heroes who were information processors 
had been delegated to unearthing information about their newest 
     Deductive Logic Man clearly had the investigation into the group's 
leader, Ultimate Saviour, well in hand. [ _Saviours of the Net_ #3 
- Footnote Girl]  That being the case, LLady now returned to her own 
demesne in the LNHQ's library. She entered the offices adjacent to the 
library reading rooms, and there found her assistant, Anal-Retentive 
Archive Kid, searching through computer databases.
     "Any luck?" she asked primly.
     ARAK looked up from his work, using his thumb to push his glasses 
back up his nose. "I think so." He gathered up some computer printouts 
from the desk beside him and stood up. He was a thin young man with brown 
hair tied back in a shoulder length ponytail. "I did some searches on 
possible suspects for who Gothic Gorilla might be. There have been a 
couple of simian net.ahumans who have turned up over the years. For 
instance, at one point Johnny Stomper filed a report on an orang-utan 
going by the name of 'BooBoo, the Apeish Avenger of Dimension 8'. 
[ _Lurker Lad_ #3 - Footnote Girl]
     "However, it occurred to me that there was one known source of 
sapient and civilised gorillas in this universe who might account for 
Gothic Gorilla." He looked at Librarian Lady, who in turn needed less 
that half a second to come to the obvious conclusion. " 'Boontown 
University," she said.
     ARAK nodded. 'Boontown University. An entire ivy-covered-campus-of-
higher-learning transported from an alternate universe and swapped for 
its counterpart in this one. [ _Challengers Of The Abominable_ #1 & 2 
- Footnote Girl]  An entire enclave of apes, hundreds of them - and not 
just sequestered away in some city in the middle of Af.rec.a, protected 
from the sight of loonihumanity by superhypnotism. They were right here, 
in the Usenetted States.
     He continued: "I contacted Mr. Rhesus, the head of 'Boontown U, 
and using my Legion credentials I got a search done on any members of 
faculty or student body with 'known occult links'."
     "Were there many?"
     ARAK looked disgusted. "Were there ever," he affirmed. "The point is 
that most of the reports were really trivial, gossipy, petty stuff. Like, 
as if someone who's read too many Dark Dungeons propaganda pamphlets had 
been walking by a room where some kids were playing Dungeons and Dragons 
and overheard one of them say, 'I use the power of the Head of Vec.net to 
cast a Bigby's Offensive Finger spell', or something like that. And then 
they'd run off to tattle, and it gets noted down on somebody else's 
record. Most of it's just gossip and hearsay."
     "It sounds as though 'Boontown University's dimension is just as 
prone to the comic book principle of 'misunderstandings lead to conflict 
and dramatic storylines' as ours is."
     ARAK paused at that; it was a valid point. He probably should have 
thought of that himself.
     "In any case," Librarian Lady continued, " 'most of it' being gossip 
and hearsay implies that there is some that was useful."
     "I think so," he agreed and extracted a printout. "There's one 
report here of a third year student by the name of Magilla O'Reilly that 
seems to be more substantive. It says here that he was a member of the 
'pro' faction of their dimension's university's Campus Crusade For 
     Librarian Lady frowned. "I'm not familiar with the group."
     Anal-Retentive Archive Kid nodded, not really surprised. "Sometimes 
student groups get a little opaque for people outside of campus. From 
what I know about the Campus Crusade For Net.thulhu from Dave Thomas 
Deluxe, it's basically devoted to finding out more about extra-dimensional 
Lovecraftian horrors - and the Great Net.thulhu in particular - and 
spreading the word on them to the public. But it's divided into two 
groups with mutually conflicting methods. The anti-Net.thulhu faction 
wants to warn about the Old Ones and other slurping horrors from Beyond. 
On the other hand, the pro-Net.thulhu group wants to spread the word to 
worship the Old One, so that when he finally arrives the devotees will be 
among the last to be eaten. It gets kinda convoluted, what with all the 
plotting and planning and scheming. I'm told that the Annual General 
Meetings can get nasty."
     Librarian Lady took off her glasses and massaged the bridge of her 
nose. "Student groups," she said, wearily.
     ARAK grinned self-depreciatingly. He opened his hands and shrugged 
and said, "What can I say?"
     "So what was this about Mr. O'Reilly?"
     "Ah, now this next bit is where it gets a bit freaky. Seems our Mr. 
O'Reilly took his pro stance a lot further than any of his fellows. Not 
just that getting on the Old One's side was a good idea from a tactical 
point of view of long term survival, but that it was a good idea *in and 
of itself*!"
     Librarian Lady stared at him, aghast. "That is insane. Why would 
anybody think of the Old Ones in that way? They're just extra-dimensional 
monsters that the Writers have placed outside our universes to be a 
suitable menace for mystical storylines. They are ravening chaos, nothing 
     ARAK shrugged. "That's usually the way it goes with Net.thulhu 
cultists. Spend a little time away from objective reality and your whole 
sense of perspective goes to seed."
     "True enough. Well then, I suppose I can guess what happened next. 
I assume that he went and spent some time in northern Net.England around 
Inputs.mouth and Archive.ham, learning blasphemous occult secrets from 
strange and inbred families. Correct?"
     "Partly," ARAK agreed. "That's certainly how he started out. He spent 
a summer vacation there. But after he came back for next semester he 
started to get interested in other, non-Net.thulhu mythos stuff. During 
the next university recess he went to his world's version of Califor.net. 
When he came back he was reported to have had an obsession with both the 
Book of the Vish.net.i and the Disc.hold. Then, about three months ago, 
he vanished. Mr. Rhesus says that unless he puts in a return appearance 
and can prove he's been covering the minimum workload for his courses, 
he's going to be failed and expelled.
     "Anyway, that's about all there is so far. The only other thing is 
this photo of O'Reilly that was supplied."
     Librarian Lady examined the photograph. Actually, it was a laserprint 
reproduction of one, but the quality was good. It was of a young gorilla 
in a polo shirt. Change the clothing and add a trenchcoat, and it was 
obviously Gothic Gorilla.


     The room was badly lit, but among the shadows could be seen 
cyclopean architecture made of black stone. There were huge buttresses 
that leaned inwards, and massive pillars holding up a ceiling that was so 
far above that it could not be seen. Sconces around the walls were alight 
with fire that illuminated the room - badly, and with a flickering, ruddy 
light. Overall, it was the perfect place for being paranoid in, since 
there were so many places were unseen lurkers could be watching...
     A Ditko-esque fanged mouth materialised, and then opened. Gothic 
Gorilla knuckled out of the portal and down the stairway that its tongue 
formed. After he was on the floor, the mouth discorporated back into 
formless ectoplasm, and thence into nothingness.
     " hOW gOES tHE pLAN? " asked an echoey voice from the shadowed 
throne at the end of the room.
     "It goes as you expected, master," replied Gothic Gorilla. "The 
Saviours of the Net are faction ridden, and there is at least one behind-
the-scenes cabal that I have infiltrated that is planning to use it for 
its own purposes. [ _Saviours of the Net_ #4 - Footnote Girl] 
     "The Legion of Net.Heroes seems to be divided as to its response. 
Self-Righteous Preacher tried to marshal some supporters, seemingly for a 
direct confrontation, and was assassinated, [ _Saviours_ #3 - Footnote 
Girl]  There may be a few in the Legion who are baying for blood over 
that, but Ultimate Ninja seems to have them under tight control; for the 
time being. It's possible that the Ninja recalls better than the others that 
the Preacher has been reliably reported dead in the past, only to return 
to life to continue his moral crusade. [ _Constellation_ #26 - Footnote 
Girl]  The Preacher will return soon, if he hasn't done so already.
     "In any case, the Legion has assigned its members to watch the 
Saviours, while at least some of them are also preparing a lawsuit. 
[ _Saviours_ #3.142857... - Footnote Girl]  Other Legionnaires seem to 
believe that it's all simply a new twist to the anti-net.hero sentiment 
that frequently but irregularly manifests itself, and that they can 
afford to ignore it. All-in-all, confusion and disorder reign."
     "None, master," agreed Gothic Gorilla. He was rather enjoying 
himself, to be honest. The time that he had spend in the hothouse of 
intrigue among the Campus Crusade For Net.thulhu back at 'Boontown 
University had given him a taste for overturning metaphorical anthills 
and watching as the insects scurried about, trying to cope. His only real 
concern was that someone - probably Occultism Kid but possibly another 
of the Legion's mystical members - had at least partly warded the LNHQ 
against most scrying spells. That would make keeping track of what the 
Legion's status was at any time difficult unless the most powerful of the 
spells of Aga.modem the All-Processing were used. And that would be taxing 
on his mystical powers. Which, really, brought Gothic Gorilla back to his 
immediate concern. "May I rest now, master?"
     " yES, mY fAITHFUL aCOLYTE.  yOU mAY rEST fOR nOW. "
     Gratefully, Gothic Gorilla moved off to the chamber that had been 
prepared for him. It wasn't really sleep that he needed, although that 
was a factor. Rather, the extra power that he had bargained for could 
only properly be recharged in this place. He passed down hallways and 
arrived at room. Within, it was shaped like the inside of a truncated 
     Gothic Gorilla approached the stone 'bed' that was situated in the 
centre of the room, preparing to lay down and rejuvenate himself. However, 
as ever when he entered this place, his attention was caught be the 
bottle placed on a stone shelf in one corner of the room. It was about 
fist sized, with a narrow neck that was stoppered to keep the swirling 
glowing blue-white vapour inside from escaping. As ever, Gothic Gorilla 
thought he could see a face almost resolving itself out of the swirling 
mist, and always wondered that if it did would he recognise it as his 
own. It would be logical to assume so, considering that it was his own 
conscience, but he had never been quite sure. Oh well, at least it wasn't 
his soul or anything important like that.
     He lay down on the slab and closed his eyes. Unnoticed, the vapour 
in the bottle continued to swirl about, and this time it did form into a 
face. And perhaps it goes without saying that the face of the gorilla in 
the bottle was not a happy one. Frustration, concern, and some small bit 
of pain all showed on its features. Then, just as it slipped away into 
incoherence again, it poked out its tongue at the recumbent form of its 

Next: More mind-boggling twists and turns, probably written by someone 
other than me.

Character Credits:
     Librarian Lady and Anal-Retentive Archive Kid created by Saxon 
Brenton. Available for this crossover under the usual stipulation that 
their character integrity is respected. Other than that, go for your life.
     Gothic Gorilla created by Arthur Spitzer. Not reserved.

Saxon Brenton     City library of the Uni of Technology, Sydney, Australia
Saxon.Brenton at uts.edu.au  

Next Week: Saviors of the NET Part IV!

Arthur "Same Classic Channel.  But Same Time?  Probably not." Spitzer

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