MISC: The Girl Who Saved the World Part 66

Scott Eiler seiler at eilertech.com
Thu Oct 26 17:16:44 PDT 2017


On 2017-10-26 15:14, George Phillies wrote:

> Brian glared at Archie. "Not a polite question. But she wouldn't cheat. 
> She just wouldn't. Besides, it's Janie and I who have gifts, which we 
> wouldn't have told anyone about.Except that idiot Emperor Roxbury showed 
> up with his stupid giant robots. Why did Roxbury have to show up here? 
> Now I have the principal, the guidance counselors, the school 
> psychiatrist, and half my teachers wanting to be real sure Janie and I 
> don't lose our tempers. I don't. After all, Janie and I had our gifts 
> for years now. No one ever suspected anything. Maybe some gamers. Janie 
> plays under an Overton cage."

...

> Trisha opened the house's side door and slipped in, closing it very 
> carefully so it would make next to no noise. Her parents complained 
> about everything. They'd complain if she slammed the door, even if she 
> didn't. She kicked off her shoes, carefully untied the shoelaces, and 
> stacked them properly at the door entrance.

The boundaries between your story parts, are almost as if you posted two 
pages of at one time, albeit taking care to respect paragraph 
boundaries.  Do you write that way?  That is to say, are you giving 
live-action updates for your new novel?  If so, I can't complain.

As ever, the story is well-crafted and gives time to build up the 
supporting characters.


-- 
(signed) Scott Eiler  8{D> -------- http://www.eilertech.com/ ---------

When you *are* the leader... whatever goes wrong... whether you did it
or not... *you* are held responsible. - Barack Obama

I know. - Archie Andrews

- from Archie #617, March 2011, scripted by Alex Simmons.


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