LNH: Classic LNH Adventures #5: LNH Triple Play #1
pwerdna at gmail.com
Sun Apr 3 23:51:09 PDT 2016
On 2/16/2016 11:08 PM, Arthur Spitzer wrote:
> If I had to pick a favorite LNH series, this is probably the one
> I'd pick since every issue had very strong writing. The
> only real problem it had was that every other issue was a part
> of some massive LNH crossover, which makes it a bit tough for
> readers that don't want to slog through the LNH timeline when
> reading a series. :)
It's true, it's true. Though the Valentine's Ball is known as one of the best
self-contained stories of the era.
> This first issue though is a self-contained issue involving
> the secret origin of the Hooded Ho`'od Win (a character
> created by Raymond "wReam" Bingham).
As I said, fascinating. <3
> ---' `---' `---' `--- //////////||||||||||||||\\\\\\\\\ ---' `---' `---' `---
> Pseudo-Random House |////////|||||LLLLLLL||||||\\\\\\\| NOT A REPRINT!
> COMIX >//////.... ( ) ....\\\\\< FABULOUS 1st ISSUE!
> ___ ___ ___ ___|.... /starring| ....|___ ___ ___ ___
> ///`v'///`v'///`v'. HOODED HO`'OD WIN ..`v'\\\`v'\\\`v'\\\\\
> ///////////... || | ....\\\\\\\\\\\\
> ///////.. ((_______) ...\\\\\\\\
> ////_______ `------' _______\\\\
> ///( ) ____ _______ ( )\\\
> /// | | | | _ \ / |\\\
> SUPER APATHY LAD ______ | | | |_) ) MULTI-TASKING MAN
> || | | _ \ | | | ===' ____ || |
> ((_______) | |_) ) `====' `===' | | ((_______)
> `------' | \ .. | | `------'
> __________ `===='`===' .' `. | \ /~~~~~|
> | | : (LNH) : `====== | ,==='
> | | `. .' | `~~|
> `=== ===' _______ ` ..' ____ ____ | ,=='
> `==' | _ \ ____ ____ \ \ / / `======
> | |_) ) | | / \ \ `' /
> | ===' | | / /\ \ `= ='
> `===' | \ | `' | `=='
> `====== `==='`==='
> ... ...
> ... _______ ...
> .. | | ..
> | #1 |
> Fall 93
> \ /
Also, I've always liked this ASCII art. It's just great. (If you're reading from
Google Groups, go up to the post options and hit "Show Original Message".)
> "Feh. S'pose." SAL sighed heavily and almost moved a muscle.
Heeheehee. <3 ...I gotta get back to him after I consigned him to an unknown
fate in Flame Wars Final. ...I gotta get back to Flame Wars Final.
> As soon as the transporter was empty, M-TM sighed a major relief. "Now
> I can finally stop loafing . . . "
You know, I never think about the contrast between these two, but they really do
have a good one. :D
> Hooded Ho`'od Win went unnoticed in the shadows of the room. Her mind
> was racing. )> ah, the turmoil! i wonder what would transpire, should the
> two ever truly conflict . . . NO! these are my teammates! i dare not permit
> myself the luxury of such conjectures . . . <( Rigidly controlling her
> thoughts, the Matchup Maiden left the computer lab, her cloak swirling in the
> Above the bar hung a facsim-
> ile of the Tantalizing Teens' Flying Jacuzzi (seats four);
It took me a while to realize that the Tantalizing Teens weren't just a name
without substance - Jef Kolodziej made it the pre-LNH backstory for several of
> "I'm so glad you decided to join me!" Catalyst Lass gushed at HHW.
> )> i didn't think i was hungry until you asked. (<
> "Y'gotta eat sometime, silly!"
This is interesting, because is it Cat's powers, the fact that you often don't
realize you're hungry until you think about it, or a combination of the two?
> The maitre'd approached. "Greetings Miss Lass. We've reserved the
> best table in the house for you. And a good evening to you too, Ms. Win."
*snerkgiggle* Ah, the days before most LNHers had non-hero identities. (Or
non-hero identities that weren't just their writers.)
> The Net.Trivia that hung by this particular table was
> a brass plaque with a moldy rabbit's foot attached. It bore the legend
> "Humbug: the Rabbit from PULP." Catalyst Lass rubbed the foot as she sat
> down, according to the tradition of the table.
> "Well, we'll have good luck now!"
> )> ever since the villain Tsar Chasm visited the HQ, my mood has been
> black. i know he wields the power to battle self-esteem, but his hasty attack
> resonated . . . <( [see The 3 Day Lull - JJMcC]
> )> precisely. they've been gone for months, yet i am unwilling to
> bring them back. i am limited to forcing heroes to clash -- this does not make
> for effective team building. at best, the bruised combatants resent my inter-
> ference. at worst, one is injured, perhaps gravely. and always, the villains
> are unaffected. <(
You hear that, Marvel and DC? >:/ >:/ >:/
> i must leave the Legion and position myself in a sector of
> society where there are no interesting conflicts -- perhaps accounting.
Ho'od Win: Raising wages vs. keeping them at the previously established level!!
> "Leave the LNH?" Catalyst Lass' voice brought the attention of nearby
> tables. She continued in a lower register. "No, Hood, you can't! I mean
> there are few enough of us girls as it is!
IT'S TRUE THO. >:/
> Maybe you just need a boyfriend --
> everyone's getting them." HHW's hood tilted back, indicating her skepticism.
Oh Cat, no ^^;
> "Great! I'm sure he'll be able to help. And after we order, I want
> your input on the formal ball I'm thinking about for Valentine's Day . . .."
> )> isn't that needlessly expensive? <(
> "Well, few insurance companies will pay for a watch chain, but the
> Hypno-Master 4800 . . . " The psychiatrist shrugged.
> "You mentioned losing control as if you were aware you could harm him.
> Obviously you suffered a previous trauma. Can you go further in the past?"
> )> yes. i . . . i <( HHW abruptly snapped out of her trance.
> )> . . . ed. my will is strongly resistant. you're welcome to try to hypno-
> tise me though. <(
I really do like the slow peeling-back of the onion here. It's effective
plotwise and emotionally.
> HHW had just left via the shadows. Dr. Trust turned to his desk and
> rubbed his hands together gleefully. "Of all the shrink shops, in all the
> cities in all the world, she walked into mine. Mine!
The trope of the evil psychologist is fascinating. I think a large part of it is
because psychology - much like medicine - has traditionally had a lingering
patrician-ness about it, an "I know better than you about your own mind" - which
is rather threatening even under the best of circumstances, and for mentally ill
people, has often been life-ruining or deadly.
> Organic Lass and Pocket Man, assuming she hasn't
> killed him. [see Passion Fishing before the Elders outlaw it! - JJMcC]
Ah, back when even the most mild of sexiness was considered super controversial.
> HHW backed up a step. )> no, i just came by thank you for sending me
> to Dr. Trust. i think he may really help. <(
> Down the hall, Irony Man eyed his detector. "I've really got to get
> this thing calibrated less finely."
Heeheehee. I do love that gag.
> Trush had cranked the device up to the
> 'Unhealthy Candor' setting.
> )> at a typical teen party, i . . . partook of typical teen experi-
> mentation. though i knew it was wrong, i succumbed to peer pressure.
Hooded Ho'od Win: An ABC Television Event
(I love how generic it is)
> later, as i listened to my 8-tracks, i became
> overpowered by the need to know . . . Ho`'od Win.
Things that came out in the '90s
> i later learned that both died on their vomit. <(
> "Surely they died years apart."
> )> true. apparently i can bring people across time from their
> last moments if the curiosity is strong enough. <(
> "Fascinating. So in Moon's case, you snatched him from the time stream
> just before a death you caused!"
> )> do not think on it too hard, doctor. that way lies madness. <(
Very interesting implications, tho. o.o;
> "Yes. We're making excellent progress. Perhaps your next visit will
> give us the key to your psyche." Trush thought further, "And with it, the key
> to my revenge! Mwah-ha-ha."
> The katana flashed in the air of the Peril Room, spraying blood and
> spandex-clad limbs. LNH members fell like threshed wheat before the martial
> artist at the eye of the storm of gore. Hooded Ho`'od Win watched from the
> control room, her fingers lingering above the VHS recorder STOP button.
This is an excellent bit of characterization. Of *course* someone who was
focused on hero fights and worried about people getting hurt would be into the
ones that happen every day without anyone actually getting hurt.
> "Who's there? Ordinary Lady called from the Peril Room. HHW toyed
> with the idea of melting into the shadows. Instead, she approached the observ-
> ation window. )> it is only she who must know . . . Who`'od Win <(
> "Hey, Hood. How'd I do?"
> )> not bad. only a few seconds off UN. <(
Also the fact that just casually killing the LNH is a Thing and that it's no
longer as disturbing as when UN started doing it.
> )> i, too, am confident, Doctor Trust. i am ready to be . . . uuhh <(
> Trush had previously set the Hypno-Master 4800 to 'Possible Psyche Damage', the
> maximum setting.
> <( You overlooked two things. Firstly, you assumed that the hypnotism
> would hold me during the battle. But She Who Must Know . . . Who`'od Win . . .
> cannot be prevented from watching, once the Conflict has started. This is
> the reason I survived the Jolly Green Giant's fall. Even the Combatants have
> no power over me during the Conflict. Thus I was also immune to SAL's powers.
> <( Secondly, you assumed an Ultimate Ninja/Master Blaster Conflict
> would hold interest for me. You couldn't know that I have hundreds of tapes of
> UN defeating the _entire LNH_, Master Blaster included. Your misfortune was
> banking on a conflict that held no mystery for me. Instead, you merely
> brought to the fore a conflict I needed to know . . . Who`'od Win. )>
And again: Makes total sense. <3
> HHW glanced at her terminal. <( Actually, now that I know my powers
> can be tightly controlled, I think it is time someone located Rebel Yell
> and Lurking Girl. Master Roster Man shows them as being coopted by someone
> named 'Scab' . . . )>
Drew "good stuff" Perron
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