MISC: De Profundis

Adrian McClure mrfantastic7 at gmail.com
Sun Aug 9 18:07:30 PDT 2015


This is a story I posted on tumblr last year, as part of the now sadly
defunct Prompt Service. I figured I might as well post it here. You may
notice strong thematic links with the LNHY work I was doing at the time.

****

When I was taken into the waters and reborn, my faith was sure. I longed
for the day when the stars will be right, when our Lord would rise for the
depths and crush the human race beneath Its holy feet. But my faith is not
what it once was. Over time, alone in the dim city under the ocean, I began
to regret my loss of human life. I began to think of all the many people
living their lives across the world, people such as I once was, and how it
hardly seemed fair to condemn them all to death.

Though I have heard my God’s voice, I have never before seen Its face. I
knew that if I did, it would probably mean that my time—and perhaps that of
humanity—was near its end. Nonetheless, I knew that prayer was not enough—I
would have to speak to It face to face. I have studied the sacred texts for
many years and knew how to navigate many-angled labyrinths where It lay
sleeping.

After many days of travel, I came to the deepest part of the city, the
place of utter darkness where my God lies dreaming. The blue flame of my
candle barely illuminated my own face. I sang the song I had read of in the
old books that even the higher adepts of our order fear to read. In the
darkness, I heard something stir. A great roar resounded throughout the
room, shaking me on my fate. A vast crimson eye opened.

“YES WHAT IS IT?”

“O Unpronouncable Lord of the Depths…”

“HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU? IT’S ‘UNSPEAKABLE.’ IT’S NOT MY FAULT IF
YOU HUMANS HAVEN’T EVOLVED ENOUGH TO PROPERLY PRONOUNCE MY NAME.”

“Oh Lord, I beseech you to hearken unto me…”

“WHAT DO YOU WANT? THE TIME WHEN I SHALL AWAKE DRAWS NEAR. I HAVEN’T GOT
ALL DAY, YOU KNOW.”

“I…” I stood dumbfounded while It waited. Eventually my fear of would
happen if I said nothing became greater than my fear of what would happen
if I spoke. “I no longer desire the destruction of the human race.”

“WHAT? IT’S TOO LATE TO TURN BACK NOW. YOU’RE NOT EVEN HUMAN ANYMORE.
YOU’VE MADE YOUR BED, NOW LIE IN IT.”

“I…” I knew that this was true. I didn’t know what else there was to say.

“ARE YOU GOING TO LEAVE OR AM I GOING TO HAVE TO SMITE YOU?”

With a trembling voice, I could only speak one word: “Why?”

“WHY WHAT?”

“Why do you seek to bring an end to humankind?”

A noise like a mighty wind filled the room, almost knocking me off my feet,
though I stood firm. I realized it was a sigh.

“NONE OF YOU EVER UNDERSTAND. ALL I EVER WANTED WAS A GOOD NIGHT’S SLEEP
BUT YOU HUMANS KEEP WAKING ME UP. YOU POISON THE OCEANS AND MAKE ALL THAT
GODAWFUL RACKET.”

I raised my eyebrows. “Have you ever actually listened to any of it?”

“WELL… NO.”

“Your mind is vaster than we mortals can imagine is it not?”

“OF COURSE.”

“Than can you try?”

“ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT.” It exhaled.

And then a strange, hideous, roaring noise burst forth. For all our
conversation I had been trembling, and now I could bear no more—I collapsed
to the wet, spongy floor. I felt as if I were going to go deaf. For a long
time—how long I could not tell—we were both silent, my God and I. I
wondered if Its eyes were closed as mine were.

It was my God who was the first to speak.

“HMM, WELL” It said. “I’LL HAVE TO THINK ABOUT THIS.”

I moaned.

“GO ON,” It said. “DO YOUR THING.”

In time I stirred, wandering back dazedly through the labyrinthine ways of
the many-angled city. I do not know how I managed to find the right paths.
Perhaps my God guided me. Perhaps It was curious what I would do next. I do
not know why It chooses what It does, Its ways are not my ways. But I
understand It better than I once did as soon as I heard that scream. For I
now believe that It was afraid. That we are as alien and strange and
sublime to It as It is to us.

----
Adrian "The Dark Spaceknight" McClure, now with sig
"All spelling errors are to be ingored"--Stephen Ratliff
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