LNH/HCC: Just Another Cascade #12 part A

Andrew Perron pwerdna at gmail.com
Wed Apr 1 13:01:52 PDT 2015


On Wednesday, April 1, 2015 at 3:14:55 PM UTC-4, Adrian J. McClure wrote:
> NOT A HOAX! NOT A DREAM! NOT AN APRIL FOOL'S JOKE!

No more than the usual, anyway

> She had tried taking Advanced Metacosmology in her one semester of Dave
> Thomas Deluxe University, but the class was at 8:30 in the morning, so she'd
> gotten absolutely nothing out of it. It had probably been a bad idea to take
> it as a freshman, too, and she probably shouldn't have taken 27 credit hours.
> No one had ever accused her of lacking ambition.

This is an adorable and hilarious bit of characterization.

> "Hold on," she said. "I think I remember about this "Friend Zone"--you can't
> enter it alone. That's kind of the whole point. You need friends there."
> 
> "But... I have been alone for countless centuries of hellish torment! Forever
> alone!" Every single person in the audience winced.

XD XD XD I love it

> "Okay guys," she said, "I've summoned the block transfer equations of a Type
> 103 Time Ship.

What a compassionate hero!

> She rubbed her chin for a moment, inwardly cackling with glee. All her time reading the LNH roster would finally pay off.

Living the dream!

> "--and... Pliable Lad? How did you get here?"
> 
> "Rifts, I guess," said Pliable Lad. He shrugged. "Last I remember, I was in
> the LNHQ, trying to help close them, then we put a piece of Beige Midnight
> Story into the rifts to close them, and I guess I got dragged through them."

Ahhhhh, nice.

> "Most likely," said Dr. Stomper, "you were hit by crossover radiation."

OF COURSE

> "But as it happens, I do not need them!" He snapped his fingers and a red
> bolt struck Cannon Fodder, killing him. Cannon Fodder sighed.

CLASSIC.

> "Uh..." Catalyst Lass looked at Sister State-the-Obvious's hand, where her
> wedding ring had once been, and frowned.

Innnnnnteresting.

> "Sure thing!" Dr. Turn-On-Tune-In-Drop-Out unrolled the fruit roll-up, sat in
> the lotus position, and slowly and reverently ate it. A ghostly blue
> afterimage afterimage of him floated up from his body and then vanished,
> bursting into sparkling blue lights...

Sure, why not?

> All of the LNH had been teleported into LAN.os's massive dungeon, where they
> were imrpisoned in stasis pods. (Your favorite character who hasn't shown up
> yet was probably there, but unfortunately didnt' have much to do other than
> be trapped and confused.)

Gosh darn it, Casey.

> .o(I... um... whoa! Look at that, man! I can hear the cosmos resonate... Seriously
> what if, like, our universe was like one small atom in this massive cosmic
> macrostructure? You ever think about that?)
> 
> .o(Oh no), said Burning Bra Lass. She would have slapped her forehead if she
> could

Gosh darn it, Dr. TO-TI-DO.

> .o(Seriously man you... whoa, your'e really pretty.) His astral hand reached
> out to touch Anti-Christ Lad's face.
> 
> .o(...thank you?) said Anti-Christ Lad, blushing.
> 
> .o(Look, this ain't the time,) said Burning Bra Lass, but she found herself
> smiling. .o(Save the cute stuff for later, just tell us what's going down.)

Awwwwwww. ^.^

> .o(We're hoping we can start a jail break, man. I can give you a blast of cosmic love to jump start your powers! Wait, no, that came out all weird, man...)

Awwwwwwwwww! ^.^

> Burning Bra Lass closed her eyes and clenched her fists. Her bra began to
> crackle with a bright orange flame, which gradually spread out over the pod.
> Then it burst open and she fell on the floor, covered with stasis fluid, and
> determined. "There ain't no chain I can't break!" she cried, raising her fist
> in the sky.

FUCK YEAH

> Two of the Dorf guards, soldiers left over from the invasion the LNH had
> fought as well as other factions of the prolonged Dorf Civil War that had
> since fallen apart [see LNH v2 #50],

Well, I mean, they *are* right across from Dorfia. It only makes sense.

> "That you, Anti-Christ Lad?" said Burning Bra Lass. As if in answer, the
> possessed guard floated in midair and his head began to spin around, vomiting
> on the four guards who were closing in.

Awesome.

> "I know that a lot of you are outcast in your own worlds, with nowhere to go.
> But LAN.os won't do you any good. You'll just replace one thing that's
> pressing you down for another. Do you want to keep lashing out because you
> can and hurt people who are just like you? Or do you want to *use* your anger
> and hit where it matters?"
> 
> "Let's get him!" said an insectoid alien in the crowd, starting a mutter that
> gradually turned into a roar.

DOUBLE AWESOME. The Net.Hippies are getting a *lot* of good moments in this one.

> "Yeah--gnn!" Burning Bra Lass's flames shot up again, and she fell on her 
> knees before pulling herself together.
> 
> "Hey, are you ok?" Dr. Turn-On-Tune-In-Drop-Out's astral form hovered over
> her. "You gotta be careful, man. Like, I admire you a lot, but sometimes I'm
> worried you give too much for the cause. Like, if you're fighting a world
> that doesn't love you, you gotta love yourself too, y'know?"
> 
> "Yeah, yeah. Let's just get this done."

Awwwww ;-;

> It was a calm, peaceful place. She wanted to stay here and enjoy the feeling
> of the soft breeze and take in everything. But she didn't want to be there
> alone. Maybe someday she'd be able to take Victoria here and they could sit
> together and watch the ocean... assuming that worked out.

Awwwwwwwwww! THIS ISSUE IS WAY TOO CUTE IN TOO MANY WAYS.

> "Now, we shall join together and capture the Kube--and then I shall be
> victorious! Even with all your might, you shall never be able to overcome me!
> It shall be a battle for the ages, but one where I shall triumph, for I
> possess the rational aptitude that you, a mere woman, can never imagine!"

He's so amazingly terrible. <3

> "All right then," she said, "Let's get this over with." She unfolded herself
> again, revealing the door. LAN.os stared in disgust, but then opened the
> door, cackling with glee...
>  
> And fell into an endless dark void, screaming all the way down.

That was easy! Turns out he was the wacky comedy villain all along.

> And Dr. Stomper was doing pretty well piloting her but Victoria, even without
> the mindlink they possessed when Net.Access was in machine form, would do so
> much better. She imagined Victoria's fingers deftly operating her controls...
> And then she felt herself blush a little. Thankfully, she was in the vortex
> of Hypertext-time, and no one was around to watch...

SO MUCH SHIPPING. Of a living ship.

> "Oooh, that was neat," said Catalyst Lass.
> 
> "...what was?" said Net.Acccess.
> 
> "When you made the wall of your console room glow a bit."

Bwahahaha :D

> It should be possible to restore the universe as long as nobody's started any
> cascades since this one." He opened the LNH wiki and skimmed the list of
> recent stories.
> 
> "Hey," said Pliable Lad, looking over his shoulder, "what's Death of Trophy
> Wife?"
>  
> "Oh dear," said Dr. Stomper.
> 
> And then the multiverse exploded.

Perfect <3

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, credits sting goes here


More information about the racc mailing list