[NTB/LNH/HCC] Legion of Net.Heroes Volume 2 #57
pwerdna at gmail.com
Thu Jan 2 00:26:42 PST 2014
On Tue, 31 Dec 2013 02:55:36 +0000 (UTC), Saxon Brenton wrote:
>  egion of
> __    
> [___][ \et.__eroes Volume 2 #57
> \ ] [ __ ]
>    
> has *once again* been highjacked to present another of the
> MISANTHROPIC TALES
> OF THE
> NET.TRENCHCOAT BRIGADE
> As a professional anarchist dedicated to raising humanity's
That's pretty damn NTB.
> Ring Job reached out and picked up the scotch bottle and held
> it up to the light. A golden brown colour filtered through the whiskey.
> Richly hued, and warmly coloured. Warm and fuzzy. Just like the
> thinking of most of humanity. Poor stupid bastards.
Very good self-righteousness there.
> And besides, it would give him the excuse to be a foul mouthed,
> chain smoking, hard drinking bastard, and that was always a lot of fun.
That is also pretty damn NTB.
> Ring Job glanced at the sky. "Aye, a bit," he said. "I'll
> pr'bably have to pack it in soon." Then he looked back at the canvas
> again and smiled. "Still, she's a beauty, ain't she?"
> The cop followed the direction of his gaze, saw the canvas, and was
> caught. The colours glowed - in fact the entire picture pulsed with an
> interior light.
> And then, while the man was staring enthralled at the picture, Ring
> Job deftly reached over and stole the gun from his holster and then
> ambled off into the crowd.
Oh, very nice. Prep time FTW.
> It was evening. Ring Job opened the skylight to the Hollywood
> warehouse and then tested the rope and harness that he planned to use to
> lower himself down to the floor below. There was no magically symbolic
> need to enter the warehouse this way - and the security on the doors was
> pretty mediocre in any case, to be honest - but Ring Job just liked the
> Mission Impossible style entrances.
Awwwwww. <3 Very good.
> The tiny box was empty of course. But that was okay, because it
> had been empty when it had appeared in 'Mork's First Christmas'. Sure,
> the dialogue had *said* it had contained homemade presents of hand
> painted flies, but there hadn't been any close up shot and in any case
> the purported flies had been forgotten when the eponymous alien had
> learned that mere material things weren't the point of giving Christmas
> So. An empty box, that had only pretended to hold something,
> which had represented a useless gift for fictional people who would
> learn better. It was absolutely perfect.
This is fascinating. o.o I love these kinds of magic systems.
> Then the hero announced, "Surrender! I,
> You're-Not-Hitting-Me-Hard-Enough Lad, am taking you in!" before
> leaping forward with a superhuman bound.
YES! YNHMHELad on the job!
(I, or someone, really needs to do a Kid E/NTB story. Clash of
> Then Ring Job ran for it. He even tried to keep the impromptu
> cover he had created for himself by throwing in an obligatory villainous
> "Bwa-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha!", but his ribs hurt too much for him to be able to
> pull it off properly.
> Now that he'd committed himself Ring Job moved with deliberation.
> He went to a mirror and took off the Nagahame mask (even though for
> magical purposes he was still wearing it) and looked at his rings.
> Almost every bit of Ring Job's exposed flesh had a piercing. They
> all had some purpose. Many of them had a symbolic meaning, and quite
> a few of them had some sort of special power.
> And the next day, pretty much everybody around the planet got some
> little thing that - on a deeply metaphysical level - they needed, even
> if they didn't particularly want it and maybe even could have really done
> without it on a practical level. Just because it was good didn't mean
> it had to be nice.
Awwwww. That's sweet, or at least, as sweet as the NTB gets.
> Huh, well what do you know. A 'Misanthropic Tales...' story
> starring a Brigade member who's actually appeared in a story within the
> past half decade, rather than being dredged out of the original _Wrath
> Of The Administrator_ cascade or the NTB FAQ.
I know, right?
> Actually, the main reason for this story is because I initially
> thought that we were lacking in an entry for the NTB imprint in the
> list of Looniverse RACCies eligibles for 2013. However feedback on
> the first posting of that list in early December, plus double checking
> subject headers, indicates that this is wrong. So now we're simply
> having another NTB story for... uhm... for the Net.Trenchcoat Brigades'
> 20th anniversary.
Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, picnic time
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