[LNH20] Sous Generis (one-shot)

[Andrew Perron]

On Fri, 13 Jan 2012 17:53:56 +0000 (UTC), Dave Van Domelen wrote:

> Coherent Comics UnInc. Presents a tale from the backstory of the LNH20:

Backstory! <3

>      "Thank you, stranger!  With the LNH busy on some undefined but certainly
> vitally important case that got them out of the way for the convenience of
> the plot, that creature would surely have hurt a lot of people if you hadn't
> shown up!" gasped a young man in a hollandaise-spattered security guard
> uniform.  "Sorry...I'm studying Exposition at the City College, but I'm still
> just a freshman."

Ridiculous plays on comic book tropes! <3

> Dealing with this sort of dilemma is part of the
> training any Sous Chef, much less the Sous Chef Supreme, must undergo in my
> homeland."

This guy! <3 (Man, I'm glad I edited the right name into The Great
Catastrophe #3.)

>      "But how did you get around the impasse?" a battered short order cook
> asked.  He had been the first to respond to the emergency when the demonic
> hare emerged in one of central Netropolis's high rise buildings, but he had
> not been equal to the task of meeting the monster's demands.

Hmmmm.  I wonder if he becomes his assistant...

>      With the confidence of a man who had faced a ravenous rabbit of unusual
> size and mystic powers before breakfast (the facing had been before
> breakfast, the rabbit had mystical powers all day except during high tea, a
> weakness the man had been unable to exploit due to the urgency and
> aforementioned before-breakfastness of the crisis)

Dang, and I had Crumpet Cannons primed and ready.

>      With a flurry of keystrokes, the original form vanished, only to be
> replaced by one that was simple to the point of raising alarms in the back of
> the Sous Chef's mind.  If the previous form was a complex ritual, this was
> more of an emergency "get it done before something emerges from a hellmouth"
> procedure.

So what do you feed a hellmouth, anyway?

>      "Blueberry waffles with raspberry jam?  How did you know that's my
> favorite?" The Random Background Legionnaire gasped.
>      "A Sous Chef Supreme makes it his business to know these things...."

RBL for Favorite New Character 2012!

>      The training of a Sugary-Lavian chef includes a lot of the stereotypical
> Mysterious Asian Mountain Monastery stuff like martial arts and the sort of
> things you'd see in the Ranma episode that involved a cooking competition.

Awesome.

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, chin-lai chin-lai Nekohanten...