SW10/HCC: Iv: The Real Story!
Scott Eiler
seiler at eilertech.com
Fri Oct 28 23:47:01 PDT 2011
Author's Note: In response to a RACC Challenge titled "Rosencrantz and
Guildenstern", to bring in common characters to tell their own story.
---
(from sw10://www.OccupyEarth.com/)
I'm Rose Goldstein, investigative reporter. I have a story to tell. I
call it "Iv: The Real Story!"
So the Planet Iv supposedly crashed into Earth in 2009.
(http://www.eilertech.com/stories/2011/trillions.htm#iv ) Why didn't we
all die immediately?
There are so many other questions we could ask about that. So I asked
the experts.
---
*Question*: We all saw Iv in the sky. But we never saw it hit. Some
kind of stasis field supposedly made us sleep through it, and kept the
Earth solid and buffered. But if we were all sleeping, how do we know
the impact actually happened?
*Answer*, from Dr. Brent A. Ziegler, of the International Institute of
Human Stasis: We *do* have stasis field technology now, similar to that
of The Trillions. We *did* turn it on in widespread manner at the time
of Iv's closest approach to Earth. Other people had intended to film
that approach. But the fields suppressed practically all electronics.
Even traditional cameras were affected by warping effects upon light
rays. In short, we have no record of the supposed impact.
---
*Question*: The Trillions supposedly *gave* us this stasis field. We
just *fought* them.
(http://www.eilertech.com/stories/2011/discontent5.txt ) Is this how we
react to the aliens who *saved* us? Or was there nothing to save us from?
*Answer*, from Don J. Kozak, of World Foreign Policy Magazine: There
have certainly been numerous quick shifts in alliance during human
history. The start of the Cold War is one example. But even that took
five years to become a bona-fide conflict. Barring political upheaval
or dysfunction within one party of an alliance, an alliance shift within
*two* years is practically unheard of. I'm forced to conclude that any
alliance Earth had with The Trillions was false.
---
*Question*: Planet Iv supposedly changed the Earth's orbit. Someone
supposedly talked to the Earth's tectonic plates so they held solid as
we bounced into the new orbit. Uh, really?
(http://www.eilertech.com/stories/2009/journal.htm#northamerica )
*Answer*, from Deborah G. Dowdell, engineer on the 2000-Mile Rail Gun
Project: I can't say I support the theory that the North American
tectonic plate can send and receive e-mail. That's the World Journal
Monthly's explanation, not ours. All we can really say is that our
project got a very brief message from an unknown source, during an
earthquake which impacted our communications network. Follow-up
messages all got responses, but we were unable to trace them precisely.
For all we know, some supervillain has an underground communications
network which taps into ours. So the idea that North America itself
talked to the other continents and got them to suspend all tectonic
activity, is at best unproven.
---
*Question*: How many of us have been off Earth since? How can we see
*where* the Earth is?
*Answer*, from Amanda R. Selig, resident of Luna City now relocated to
Fort Devens, Massachusetts
(http://www.eilertech.com/stories/2007/occupation.htm#earthfall ): Some
of those rednecks from Mars say Earth has moved.
(http://www.eilertech.com/stories/2010/rednecks.htm ) But I've *been*
to their Mars colony. I got to say, they'd be pretty easy to bribe to
tell whatever story you want. We definitely need to get that
interplanetary perspective back to tell for sure. Too bad the Moon's
not there any more; Iv *did* slam into it. But Earth? How could Iv hit
Earth *and* the Moon? It would have had to bounce like a billiard ball!
---
*Question*: The sun looks dimmer most of the time. But the mad
scientist Ellipsis has already admitted he can manipulate the amount of
sunlight hitting the Earth.
(http://www.eilertech.com/stories/2010/neworbit.htm#moltensky ) How do
we know he's not doing it now?
*Answer*, from Larry M. Glover, professional optic engineer: We do
know there's technology to warp optic rays on large scale. To affect
solar light, it would have to be deployed in space. Earth's space fleet
currently lacks a deep-space deployment ability. But Ellipsis and his
superhuman allies can go into space even with large masses. So I have
to conclude, it's possible he *is* manipulating the amount of solar
energy hitting the Earth.
---
*Question*: Astronomers *say* they can see the orbital change in
everything they look at. But if Ellipsis can manipulate the light from
the sun, he could manipulate the light from *everything*!
*Answer*, from Alan L. Bridges, former staff astronomer at Harper
College, Palatine, Illinois: We *do* appear to see the planets in
different positions now. Those positions *are* consistent with a theory
that *most* of them haven't changed their orbits but Earth has. Mercury
and Earth's former Moon have also. Jupiter is in its former orbit, but
nuclear fusion is now taking place there. All its moons are shifted and
it's difficult to tell exactly how, with the different optical
conditions there. Earth itself also has different optical conditions,
due to certain energy manipulations in orbit. In short, we can *assume*
what we see is the new baseline state of the Solar System, but it's hard
to confirm.
---
So. My conclusion, alongside six independent experts? Hoax!
I speak for the Occupy Earth Movement. We have one demand: Stop
pretending there are external causes for our economic crash. End the
injustice upon Earth!
---
Author's Notes:
My favorite viewpoint character Wyatt Ferguson was as recently as 2003
resident in the Marvel Universe. Then he commented how most people
consider Galactus to be a specially-equipped weather balloon which Reed
Richards once launched from the Baxter Building.
(http://www.eilertech.com/stories/lxmf.htm#deathtrap ) Marvel Comics
later published a different public perception: Merchandising hoax!
"Galactus: The Real Story", April 2009.
Heh. Public perception is mutable, isn't it? Maybe even if something's
*moved* the world? I have the urge to find out. Hence, this story.
In the spirit of this challenge, I used the random name generator of
http://www.fakenamegenerator.com/. So the names may be public domain.
But the *characters* are all copyright 2011 by Eiler Technical Enterprises.
--
(signed) Scott Eiler 8{D> -------- http://www.eilertech.com/ ---------
Turns out I'm an anally-fixated oedipal paranoid with
south-of-the-border schizophrenic delusions... But never mind, I've
found me the ideal job. I'm going to run for President!
- Major Honey, scripted by Grant Morrison, Doom Patrol #46, August 1991.
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