MISC: One Day at a Time #16

[James Mason]

                                Chapter 16: 
                    I will come up with a name later.

Announcer: It's another wonderful day, as Alex wakes up from a dream 
that she doesn't remember. It was meh anyway, so no loss. So! She gets 
ready for the day doing what you'd think, and it's pretty normal, down 
to stuffing some dresses and makeup in her bag. Wait, what? I thought 
her character was going to be some sort of masculine tough girl who 
never wears makeup! Maybe we should listen to her thoughts.

Alex: .oO(I wonder if Miranda is bringing that lipstick I like.)

Announcer: ...whatever, let's just continue on. So anyway, like I was 
saying, she goes through the motions and eventually ends up at work. 
Where does she work again? Ah, yes, coffee shop. Yes, I've read the 
previous chapters beforehand. Can you tell me why the main character is 
a cat-person-thing? Everyone else seems to be a normal human, so I--

Alex: .oO(I'm not late this time. Thank goodness. Okay, to be fair, the 
fucking Smoothie machine broke today, but hopefully they'll fix it by 
breaktime.)

Miranda: Hey, Alex!

Alex: Oh, hey, Miranda. We still on for the charity thing?

Miranda: Did you bring your dresses?

Alex: And the Makeup!

Announcer: Ohhhh, okay then.

Miranda: By the way, if you were late again, you would have been fired. 
Just so you know.

Alex: Er... thanks. .oO(Who would have thought that having a manager 
for a friend would be inconvenient to the job?)

Announcer: So her day goes on and it's uneventful even when that guy 
comes in.

That Guy: Hey what do you have here?

Miranda: Well, we hav--

Announcer: Wait, what!? Did that guy just point at her and make her 
organs and body parts blast away from her without an explosion?

That Pointy Explody Guy: Oh, sorry. Sometimes I get impatient, and, 
well... I kind of explode people.

Miranda: *to Alex, who was a few feet away* I'm not sure we can make 
the charity thing.

Alex: I would be worried except I've seen people survive this, for 
quite a while even!

Miranda: Well, then, can you get this guy's order?

Alex: Just a sec. I have to use the restroom.

Announcer: Reminds me of this date I had yesterday. She was in the 
bathroom for eight hours. So I left her a note. I don't think I'll see 
her again. So Alex goes into the girls' restroom and sneaks into the 
boys' room by leaving the girls' room when that guy isn't looking. I 
hope she finds out his name, because I don't want to keep calling that 
guy "that guy". How about Steven? I like it.

Alex: Okay, now that I'm here, I can transform without anyone noticing. 
Oh, there are windows in the bathrooms? I should have used them.

A guy who's not Steven: Huh? What was that?

Alex: I said you had laxatives in your coffee.

Laxatives guy: Oh. *runs to the stalls*

Alex: Now then. *TRANSFORMATION SEQUENCE! ...that you will never see! 
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!*

Steven: … ... ... ...think she left?

Sir Greg: *opens the door politely, goes through, then closes it very 
carefully* Ahem! YOU SHALL NOT EXPLODE PEOPLE ON MY WATCH!

Steven: ...did you go to the bathroom carrying your body armor? Wasn't 
it heavy?

Sir Greg: Yes... yes it was. NOW, THEN! YOU CANNOT EXPLODE PEOPLE 
WHENEVER YOU WANT!

Steven: I don't really do it whenever I want. It's just kind of an 
impulse.

Sir Greg: Then shouldn't you hide somewhere where you can't do any 
harm?

Steven: Well, I would, but I like floating above buildings.

Sir Greg: I guess I would like flying if I could. I guess. BUT I MUST 
STILL TURN YOU IN!

Steven: Well, all right then, I'll go with you.

Sir Greg: R-really? The last times I did this I kind of had to fight.

Steven: Well, I-- hurk!

Sir Greg: Oh, jeez, did the coffee give you heart burn? Oh wait...

Steven: *convulses out on the floor a little, then looks up in a creepy 
fashion at Sir Greg* Actually, I think you should take a rest. SO SAYS 
NAVE! *and then he points at her and she flinches but nothing happens* 
Huh. That's... kind of my only thing. Besides flying. *attempts to 
run!*

Sir Greg: OH NO YOU DON'T!

Announcer: So she tries to rush him. But ends up smacking into him.

Steven (or is it Nave?): AHHHHHHHHHHHH! Jeez I think you broke... my... 
ah, crap. I blacked out again, didn't I?

Sir Greg: Blacked out?

Steven or Nave or whatever: Did my body do anything while I was out?

Sir Greg: It tried to blast my organs out, but it couldn't. Then it 
tried to run, then I accidentally ran into you. I hope you didn't break 
anything.

Nave, I'm calling him Nave now: Actually... *stands up* I'm getting 
better-- physically, not mentally, as you can guess. My name is Evan, 
by the way.

Announcer: SON OF A BITCH! Fuck it, I'm not giving anyone any nicknames 
anymore! ...hey, that guy in the background has a puppy! I'll call him 
Puppy Boy!

Evan: I'm not sure if I can keep myself like this for more than... eh, 
it was quite a while last time. I'll be fine, but you should check on 
your friend back there. I kind of exploded a few people before and I 
left without checking. Sorry, by the way.

Sir Greg: Taking you with me just so you won't do any more damage!

Evan: Okay, but my back still hurts, so-- HURK!

Announcer: She's kind of being a hard girl right now. Kind of... I 
don't know, she seems kind of clueless about what he just said.

Sir Greg: Mirand-- I mean, lady, are you okay?

Miranda: Eh, I don't mind too much. Kind of a good view and it's nicely 
breezy.

Sir Greg: Hang on, I'll call the hospital!

Announcer: Hard to dial phone numbers when you go lighting-fast.

Sir Greg: Dang it! Hey, do you know of any phones around here?

Evan: There's one over there also I have my cell phone.

Sir Greg: Great, give it!

Evan: On second thought, let me call them. I did it last time.

Sir Greg: Well if you're going to be *rude* about it.

Announcer: So for some reason, we are now six hours in the future and 
in the boys' room. I don't get it.

Laxatives guy: ...wait, I didn't have laxatives with my coffee. In 
fact... I don't think I had coffee! I think I just came in here because 
I had to go to the bathroom! But I think should stay in here, just to 
be safe...