RACCCafe: A Return to the RACCCafe

Andrew Perron pwerdna at gmail.com
Tue Dec 21 11:31:44 PST 2010

On Dec 20, 9:42 pm, Arthur Spitzer <arspit... at earthlink.net> wrote:

> Even Goddamn-You-X-mas-Goddamn-You-Straight-to-Hell Lass was whistling a
> happy Anti-Christmas Carol as she drank her Anti-Eggnog while typing
> another Anti-X-Mas screed on her Anti-X-mas blog.  (Eligible for the New
> Character Award RACCie!)

Goddamn-You-Xmas-Goddamn-You-Straight-to-Hell Lass hummed antimerrily.
"...hmm hmmm hmm clanging chimes of doom..."

A head popped up next to her table.  It had a ludicrous moustache on
its face, obviously cut out of a piece of black felt, and spoke in a
falsalto voice with a ridiculous accent. "Hulloooo, young la-dee!  How-
a are yoooo?"

GYXGYStH Lass chuckled. "You should probably take off your 'Hello, my
name is Kid Enthusiastic' tag first."

Kid E oh'ed and sat down next to her.  He watched as she clicked and
clacked at the keyboard. "Hey, Gosh Dangit Christmas Lass?"

She sighed. "Yes, Kid Eucharistic?"

"Why is it that you hate Christmas, anyway?"



"Oh boy, Uncle Ken, I can't wait until we get to the front of this
line and see Santa Claus!"

"Ha ha!  Settle down, young lady, or you'll--"

"Oof!" "Ow!" "Hey, stop that man!"

"Woohoo!  The line's gone!  Hi, Santa!"

"Ho ho ho, hello there!"

"Ugh... but why?  All you had to do was hold him for a second!"

"Shhh, talking to Santa.  I want a speedboat and a katana and a
kareoke set..."


"Boy, that was fun, Uncle Ken!  ...Uncle Ken?"

*kaff kaff* "help... me..."

"NOOOOOO!  Who did this to you!?"

"it was... him..."

*gasp!* "That man from before!  And... Santa Claus!"

"Mwa ha ho ho ho!"

"Curse you, Xmas!  Curse yooooooooooooo!"


Kid Enthusiastic had his hands to his mouth in shock and horror.
"So... your uncle *died*?"

"...well, no.  Actually, he's still alive, and living in the Poconos.
But Xmas had temporarily disabled him, and for that, I swore eternal


Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, doesn't make a whole lot of sense,

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