LNH/RACCies: Just Imagine Saxon Brenton vs. Andrew Perron in the Return of the RACCies! #7

[Andrew Perron]

"Of course!  We'll have to go to the point where the worlds intersect - 
the crystal wall at the center of the universe, where the Anonymous 
\Anglo-Saxon Alliterative Poet Corps imprisoned Cyborg Gorilla 
Hemingway!"

The shards of the parlor door were kicked into the room, and in stepped 
the Interim Iconoclasts. Their leader snarled, "But first, I think we 
have some business to attend to."

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PREHISTORIC PRODUCTIONS PRESENTS

"ACROSS THE RIVER AND INTO THE TREES AND PAST THE FORCEFIELD AND 
THROUGH THE LASER MAZE"

OR

"THE BITTORRENTS OF SPRING"

Just Imagine Saxon Brenton vs. Andrew Perron in the Return of the 
RACCies! #7

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WHAT IS GOING ON HERE: Pointless Awards Man IV told Bluetooth that the 
Hungry Past of the Looniverse is still hungry!  Bluetooth told PAM IV 
that he needs the Legacy Beam!  The Interim Iconoclasts took it, but 
not before it transformed Hi-Fi Lorelai and Blasferatu!  The Hungry 
Past's continuity zombies showed up, but the Red Herring showed up and 
zapped them with colors!  They went to get the Manga Men, but only Pink 
was there and Convoluted Origin Zombie attacked!  They got blown into 
the universe inside issue #6 of Just Imagine Saxon Brenton's RACCies on 
a Plane Filled with Killer Ninja Gorillas!  They figured out how to 
cure the zombies, and they got Plot-Error Man to help them!  Then the 
quote happened!

Okay GO!

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They lined up across the room, the motley collection of multicolored 
heroes on one side, the insidious Interim Iconoclasts on the other.  
The air crackled with tension (as well as stray bolts of color-energy).

As the antagonists assembled drove forward into a dramatic 
moment-before-the-battle splash page, there was an insistent beeping 
from the waist of one of the Iconoclasts.  As the fight scene spilled 
out from the parlor and into the beautiful marble foyer, she 
sidestepped into an alcove and pulled out a tricorder-ish device.  Her 
eyes widened as she read the display. "Sir!"

"I'm a bit busy!" snarked the leader of the Iconoclasts, dueling 
against Blasferatu's stake-sword.

"This... this is *drama*!"

The leader blinked, absentmindedly parrying and thrusting. "What?  Did 
one of the tanks spring a leak?"

"We didn't harvest this, sir, it's coming out of the situation!"

As one, the Iconoclasts turned and gasped.  The leader somersaulted out 
of the battle and shouted to his cohorts. "Interim Iconoclasts!  We 
must preserve the drama!  Don't explain what we're doing here, make 
sure that we hang on to the MacGuffin that one of the heroes is 
pursuing, and leave suddenly!"

"Meow!" the assemblage replied.

Ropes dropped from the skylight, and they rappelled up the walls.  
Bluetooth attempted to climb after, but the ropes shimmied out of his 
reach.

"I'll MacGuffin you!  Come back here with the Legacy Beam!  &^#*!!"

"Bluetooth!" Manga Man Violet held him back. "They're gone.  We have to 
get going as well."

"But they-- we-- I-- nrgh mrrr krngy best at what I do..."

As Bluetooth twitched, narrating spasmodically, Manga Man Violet turned 
to Plot-Error Man. "How do we get to the center of the universe?  Do 
you have some kind of spaceship, or net.thingee?"

Plot-Error Man coughed. "Ah, not quite."

"Eh?"

"Well, you know, this universe is kind of small.  So..."

"So?"

"So the center is kind of in the core of the Earth."

Blasferatu boggled. "Aristotlean cosmology?  Man, you one crazy..."

"Shut your mouth!" interrupted Hi-Fi Lorelai.

"Anyway," said Plot-Error Man, "there's a tunnel down to the depths 
underneath my house.  It's not far from here."

They walked out of the House of Bertrand Weevil.  The sun was shining 
brightly on the well-manicured grounds, a light breeze was swaying the 
branches of the trees, and the wispy clouds were spelling out "REMEMBER 
TO VOTE IN THE RACCIES".

Manga Man Pink turned questioningly to Plot-Error Man, who coughed. 
"Well, World President Brenton thought it'd be a helpful reminder, and 
the Science Council agreed..."

The Red Herring said, "Magnificent!  This is the third silliest planet 
I've ever encountered!"

The group piled into Plot-Error Man's retro-cool electric-powered 
1920s-style automobile.  Convoluted Origin Man coughed, just to 
establish that he's in this issue, too.

They drove down the peaceful, winding road, through the sun-dappled 
byways, around the groves of cherry trees, the sparkling lake, the 
grass glimmering with dew, the--

"Tezuka's beret, Plot-Error Man, how idyllic *is* this place?" said 
Manga Man Pink.

P-EM shrugged. "Hey, when I make a fantasy world, I don't go halfway."

They arrived at Stately Ploteau Manor.  Plot-Error Man's plot-error 
manservant showed them into the spacious, airy foyer.

"The playroom-slash-tunnel-to-the-depths is right through here," said 
Plot-Error Man, stepping through the huge double doors and gesturing to 
a huge, round hole leading to an apparently bottomless pit. "Ah, and 
this is my son."

The Manga Men stopped and stared at the young lad.  Finally, Manga Man 
Violet spoke. "Your son?  But he's the spitting image of..."

"Yes," said the boy, turning from his toys, speaking in a clear voice 
which surprised even his father. "Of the original Manga Man!  But 
there's no time for a cliffhanger right now!"

"What could be more important than a revelation like that!?" shouted 
Manga Man Violet.

"*You* need to go host the RACCies!" And Plot-Error Man's son kicked 
Manga Man Violet into the hole.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaa..."

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Whew.  Yep, a short one to tie in to the RACCies and establish a few 
critical plot points.  Now that that's done, whoever wants to can write 
the next chapter. (I recommend splitting up the team; it's getting a 
bit crowded!)

Manga Man created by Craig Thomas Judd
Pointless Awards Man IV (aka Manga Man Violet) created by Jesse Willey
Never-Gets-Credit-For-His-Dialogue Lad created by Arthur Spitzer, turned
into Bluetooth by Jamie Rosen
Power Manga created by Jamie Rosen
Red Herring created by Kieran O' Callaghan
Convoluted Origin Man created by Matt Rossi
Plot-Error Man created by Jef Kolodziej
Blasferatu and Hi-Fi Lorelai created by Andrew Perron

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, nurgle.