[REVIEW] The Tribulations of Kid Review #1

[Andrew Perron]

Some more Jolt City comments, this time on #9 to 11:

>   "So are these kids," says the chief.  "They're
> using advanced technology, giving them powers beyond
> that of ordinary men, to commit crimes.  That's the
> definition of a supervillain under the laws of the
> United States." 

Oooo, very nice bit of worldbuilding.

> Soon, they're
> whole again, and standing on what Martin presumes is
> the snail-earth.  This is confirmed by the squeaky,
> nasal voices he hears at his feet.
>   "Viva la resistance!" 

...this is *not* a clunker. XD It's like he's slipping between Dark
Knight Modern Age Batman and Caped Crusader Silver Age Batman, really,
really smoothly. Awesome.

>    "No.  This we do ourselves, though it takes a
> hundred thousand generations.  Your names will live
> forever-- Green Knight and Dipshit."
>    Darkhorse stares at Martin.  "Not cool, man.  Not
> cool." 

Heeheeheehee

Hmmmm.  The part where they plan on taking a month to get somewhere
but live six weeks at the max doesn't make a whole lot of sense. >>

I notice that the whole "sent to prison" thing is an example of the
world dumping on Martin, but that's okay.  It's only a problem if
that's the only thing that ever happens to him.

> While it's true that the nation's
> prison population is predominately black, the
> statistics are inverted for supercriminals, who are
> mostly, and historically, white.
>    Martin figures it's because they have better things
> to do than run around in spandex hiding clues to their
> upcoming crimes.  White people.  Feh. 

Worldbuilding, joke, and characterization in one.

>    "Two.  Sort of.  We only pulled off the first one.
> The partridge.  And so rather than try to find a bird,
> we kidnapped Danny Bonaduce." 

Ah, man. XD

>    "Do you love me, Martin?"
>    The question hangs in the air.  Some time passes,
> and Martin realizes that he's alone.  He wonders if he
> awoke from a dream, or if it was real; he wonders if a
> moment has passed or an hour; he wonders if he
> answered the question or not, and if he did, he
> wonders what his answer was. 

One of the best drama moments in the series.

>    Martin pulls a hunk of glass out of his cheek.
> With his fingertip, he touches the wound, while his
> tongue swishes about inside; he ends up licking his
> finger.

Ow.

>    Convinced of his solitude, Derek Mason pulls off
> the Green Knight mask again, wadding it up in his fist
> like a rag and mopping the reams of sweat off his
> face.

Hah, I knew it.

>    Derek sees two more gorillas with fish bowls
> standing on the next floor.  They are armed with
> something resembling harpoons, and they are dressed in
> Vibra-Jackets.
>    "...Apelantis," says Martin. 

...of course. XD

>    "Dani!"  Martin rushes up the stairs and trips over
> his feet, falling forwards.  His chin collides with a
> stair step and his teeth squeeze his tongue painfully.

He's just not having a good day, is he.

>    "What?  No," she says, shaking her head.  "I'm not
> a four-colour.  I just wear this in order to protect
> his secret identity."

Wow, that makes a lot of sense.  I wonder why nobody's ever thought of
that before. `.`

>    Martin smiles, selects one final rye crisp, and
> takes a hearty bite.  "Well, that's quite a
> coincidence, Derek Mason.  Because I think it's about
> time I had myself a sidekick." 

Woohoo!

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, yet more good stuff.