[Contest][ASH] High Concept Challenge #2: Think Of The Children

Andrew Perron pwerdna at gmail.com
Tue Aug 25 02:01:06 PDT 2009

On Tue, 11 Aug 2009 02:09:30 +0000 (UTC), Saxon Brenton wrote:

Responding a couple of weeks late to this one, but:

> Your attempt to present an overview of the different lines of thought  
> about the departure of our people from humans and hypothetical recontact  
> is good.  I particularly liked the figure of a diplomat who for reasons  
> of professional objectivity can summarise the different positions within  
> the word count allocated.  The inclusion of incidental details about the 
> Academy members shows an above average attention to detail for human  
> paranormal current affairs.
> However, the sudden shift to a battle scene is jarring, and the use of  
> a hamster super scientist who casually defeats the humans is both  
> implausible and reeks of wish fulfilment.
> B+ 

Hah!  A twist that I most assuredly didn't see coming, despite the fact
that you *said* what it was at the very beginning.  Awesome.

> In particular the line about the tailored influenza virus being used to  
> remove humanity's magene was a reference to the way that in the 21st  
> century setting of ASH there are an increasing number of paranormals but  
> in the 38th century setting of the Spear-Carriers there are very few.   
> As well as being a concrete goal for Dr Incisor to aim for it was also  
> originally meant as a bit of pseudo-foreshadowing; and of course as a  
> literary reference it's an inversion of the Wildcards virus used to  
> introduce superpowers into the human gene pool.

Hmmmmm.  I wonder if this would actually work; you'd think somebody would
have tried it or something similar...

>      (And somewhere Continuity Porn Star dances, shaking his booty at 
> the readership.)

*tucks a dollar-bin comic into his G-string*

Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, great googly moogly.

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