[Contest][ASH] High Concept Challenge #2: Think Of The Children
pwerdna at gmail.com
Tue Aug 25 02:01:06 PDT 2009
On Tue, 11 Aug 2009 02:09:30 +0000 (UTC), Saxon Brenton wrote:
Responding a couple of weeks late to this one, but:
> Your attempt to present an overview of the different lines of thought
> about the departure of our people from humans and hypothetical recontact
> is good. I particularly liked the figure of a diplomat who for reasons
> of professional objectivity can summarise the different positions within
> the word count allocated. The inclusion of incidental details about the
> Academy members shows an above average attention to detail for human
> paranormal current affairs.
> However, the sudden shift to a battle scene is jarring, and the use of
> a hamster super scientist who casually defeats the humans is both
> implausible and reeks of wish fulfilment.
Hah! A twist that I most assuredly didn't see coming, despite the fact
that you *said* what it was at the very beginning. Awesome.
> In particular the line about the tailored influenza virus being used to
> remove humanity's magene was a reference to the way that in the 21st
> century setting of ASH there are an increasing number of paranormals but
> in the 38th century setting of the Spear-Carriers there are very few.
> As well as being a concrete goal for Dr Incisor to aim for it was also
> originally meant as a bit of pseudo-foreshadowing; and of course as a
> literary reference it's an inversion of the Wildcards virus used to
> introduce superpowers into the human gene pool.
Hmmmmm. I wonder if this would actually work; you'd think somebody would
have tried it or something similar...
> (And somewhere Continuity Porn Star dances, shaking his booty at
> the readership.)
*tucks a dollar-bin comic into his G-string*
Andrew "NO .SIG MAN" "Juan" Perron, great googly moogly.
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