TRANSPARENT COMICS: Enforcers #4 - "Pairs, Part 2"

Frumpy jmturner at
Thu Nov 20 11:07:36 PST 2008

	On a space station in a quiet part of the universe, a pudgy humanoid
with bright yellow skin sat down at his work station.  He turned on a
very small computer after letting out a yawn.  He was anxious to begin
his sleep cycle for the day.  The trip he had just returned from had
really worn him out, but he had to make sure all the areas assigned to
him were safe first.  He rubbed his eyes.  Then he quickly glanced
over all the data on the computer screen.  Everything seemed to be in
order until he got near the bottom of the list.
	“Oh my,” he said in a language unknown to you and I.  “How could this
have happened?”
	He quickly pushed some buttons on his computer console to garner more
	“It’s true,” he muttered to himself.  “There are only 36.”
	He pushed a few more buttons on the console, and all the strange text
disappeared from the computer screen.  It was replaced with the face
of another alien with bright yellow skin.
	“Ah, so you’re home, Plon,” the face on the screen said with a
smile.  “Did you complete your mission successfully?”
	“Yes, sir,” Plon answered.  “If I hadn’t, I would still be away on
that mission.  You know I’m not one to leave things unfinished, but
I’m afraid I took too long.”
	“Why would you say that, my friend?”
	“I’ve returned to find a planet assigned to me has fallen below 40,”
explained Plon.  “There are only 36 when they need 40.  Didn’t anyone
check my planets for me while I was away?”
	“Well, Slad was supposed to, but unfortunately, his own work kept him
too busy,” the alien on the screen told Plon.  “In fact, Slad got so
busy that he didn’t get a sleep cycle for 2 days.  He should be
returning from his much-needed rest soon.  What planet has fallen
below 40, Plon?”
	“Earth,” Plon replied.
	“Earth!,” the alien exclaimed.  “That’s the most important planet
under your jurisdiction!  You had better go there right away to fix
things.  I hope the enemy hasn’t found out about this already.  That
would be disastrous!”
	“I know,” agreed Plon.  “I’ll leave immediately, sir.”
	“Take Slad with you,” instructed the alien.  “On an urgent mission
like this, you could use an extra man.  I’ll do my best to cover for
the both of you in your absence.”
	“Yes, sir,” Plon said, and he turned off his computer.  He walked
down a long, winding hallway.  Then he took an elevator down 2 levels
to the living quarters.  Slad met him by the elevator door.
	“You certainly got ready in a hurry,” commented Plon.
	“All I had to do was stand up,” Slad grinned.  “I was so tired that I
fell into my sleep chamber with my boots and uniform still on.”
	“You and your uniform could both use a cleansing,” Plon noted as Slad
moved closer to enter the elevator.
	“Sorry,“ Slad apologized.  “I’ll use the cleansing chamber aboard
ship while we’re on our way.”
	“Are we to take Cruiser I, Cruiser II, or Cruiser III?,” inquired
	“The station commander said to take Cruiser III,” Slad informed him.
“Cruiser I is off on a mission, and Cruiser II is undergoing repairs
from some damage it suffered in a meteor shower.”
	“I hope no one aboard Cruiser II was hurt,” said a concerned Plon.
	“The 3 passengers were fine,” Slad said.  “The whole meteor shower
could have been avoided, but Blin was flying the ship manually at the
time.  You know how adventurous he is.”
	“I do indeed,” confirmed Plon.  “Blin never seems to want to do
anything the easy way.  That’s certainly not my approach.”
	Cruiser III was soon on its way to Earth.  Plon just punched the
coordinates into the ship’s computer, and Cruiser III basically flew
itself.  While Plon relaxed at the controls in the front of the ship,
Slad freshened up himself and his uniform in the cleansing chamber
near the back of the ship.
	“That’s better,” Slad smiled.
	“Most definitely,” agreed Plon.

	After finishing their dinner, Mickey Hale and Allison Anderson went
for a walk together in the park.  They ended up sitting on the ground
under some trees to cuddle and talk.  Mickey was doing most of the
talking as Allison rested her head on his shoulder.
	“Yeah, surfing used to be my life,” Mickey told her.  “When I wasn’t
doing it, I was daydreaming about it, but I pretty much lost interest
in it once I became Waterboy.  I mean, riding a wave on a surfboard
feels lame after you’ve actually been a part of a wave.  Whoa!  What’s
	Allison raised her head up to see what Mickey saw.  There was
something strange up in the sky.  It appeared to be an aircraft of
some kind, but it didn’t look like any aircraft they were familiar
	“It looks like it’s going to land,” Allison said.  “What do you think
it is?”
	“It could be some new weapon from Professor Baleful,” Waterboy
speculated.  “That creep hasn’t been around for a while.  He’s about
due to start causing trouble with some new invention of his.”
	“Could it be something from outer space?,” Allison asked hesitantly.
	“After meeting Dracula, anything’s possible!,” Mickey replied.  “I
better go check it out, Allison.  Looks like our date is over, but
maybe we can meet up again sometime real soon.”
	“Real soon,” agreed Allison.
	Mickey took off in the direction of the descending aircraft.  Allison
grabbed her handbag and searched for somewhere to change into her
Electric Lady costume.

	“I believe Super Knight’s old base is going to make a fine new
headquarters for the Enforcers,” concluded Magic King.  “The best part
is that it’s mobile.”
	“That means we can get a new address Super Knight doesn’t know
about,” added Worm Woman.  “How fast do you think those big wheels
will carry this thing?”
	“I suspect it will be slow traveling,” responded Magic King.  “Super
Knight didn’t design it for frequent travel.  He only made it this way
in case emergency relocation was needed.  We’ll have to have a team
meeting to decide just where to move it.”
	“My home must not be moved!,” a strange voice cried from the shadows,
and the two Enforcers turned to see a ghostly being hovering out of
the darkness.  A few similar beings appeared beside it from out of

	“This is not a home,” Plon said.  “It appears to be some sort of
prison facility.”
	“This is where the computer told us to find Dexter Collins,” Slad
assured him.  “You know all the 40 do not have morals.  There must be
some immoral ones as well to maintain a proper balance.”
	“I know, but I have never been fond of endowing the immoral ones,”
Plon sighed.  “Can we do it from here, or must we go inside?”
	“It can be done from here,” Slad said.  “Aim for the third barred
window on the left.  He is being held there alone.”
	Plon pointed a strange device at the window Slad had indicated.  A
strange ray came from the device, but the ray was undetectable by
earthly eyes.  Only beings of Slad and Plon’s race could see it.  Its
target--Dexter Collins--was sleeping on a cot when the ray struck
him.  Collins didn’t feel a thing and continued to sleep.

	A short distance away behind some shrubbery, Waterboy was watching
two beings standing outside a county jail.  He had never seen men with
that skin color before.  Maybe they were from space like Allison had
suggested--that is, if they were from the strange aircraft at all.  As
Waterboy had headed off in the direction of that strange flying
object, it had seemingly vanished into thin air, but then he had
spotted this peculiar pair of strangers.  Electric Lady joined him
behind the bushes.
	“What are those men doing outside this jail?,” Allison asked.
	“I don’t know, but I’m not sure if they even are men,” Mickey
answered.  “They don’t seem like they’re hurting anything, though.
It’s real weird.”

	The device in Plon’s hand made a beeping noise, so he turned it off.
	“Now the number is back up to 40,” smiled Slad.  “Our work here is
	“No,” disagreed Plon.  “While we are here, we should endow some
extras, so we will not have to return for a while.”
	“How many extras should we endow?,” inquired Slad.
	“Regulations state we must have at least 40 at all times but no more
than 50,” Plon said.  “I would say five more would be sufficient.  The
computer on Cruiser III will select them for us.  First, we must make
sure no one saw us here.”
	Plon and Slad looked around, and Slad spotted Waterboy and Electric
Lady hiding behind the shrubs.
	“They have seen us,” Slad pointed out.

	“What language is that they‘re speaking?,” Waterboy wondered.
	“I’ve never heard anything like it,” confessed Electric Lady.
	“Uh oh,” said Waterboy.  “The yellow dudes have spotted us, and
they’re coming this way.”
	“One of them is pointing something at us,” gasped Electric Lady.

	“It is no problem that they have seen us,” Plon assured Slad.  “They
can be easily adjusted.”
	Plon used another of his odd devices.  He turned it on, and a bright
beam of light headed toward Waterboy.  Waterboy turned into his liquid
form, so the beam of light passed over a puddle of water.
	“Remarkable,” commented Plon.  “He must be someone I endowed
previously.  He must have thought the beam would cause pain.  He did
not know its true purpose.”
	The true purpose of the beam was some sort of hypnotic effect.
Electric Lady stood with a blank stare on her face after looking at
the light for a few seconds.  Being in the presence of the beam had
also entranced Waterboy.  Under the influence of the beam, the two
humans could somehow understand Plon and Slad.
	“Puddle of water, become your human form once more,” commanded Plon,
and Waterboy became solid again.  “What is your name?”
	“Mickey Hale,” Waterboy said in a monotone voice.
	“That name is not familiar to me,” Plon said.  “You must have gained
your abilities through some other means.  Female, what is your name?”
	“Allison Anderson,” Electric Lady responded as if she were a robot.
	“Now that is a name I recognize,” Plon said.
	“You are wasting time,” Slad said.
	“Perhaps,” agreed Plon.  “I was just curious about them.  The two of
you will remember nothing of us or encountering us.  We will be
completely removed from your memories.”
	Mickey and Allison nodded obediently, and the two aliens departed.
About five minutes after they left, Waterboy and Electric Lady snapped
out of their trances.
	“What are we doing here?,” Waterboy wondered.
	“When did I become Electric Lady?,” Allison wondered.  “I wasn’t in
my costume a minute ago.”

	“Great,” said Worm Woman.  “We have a haunted headquarters.”
	“I don’t think so,” disagreed Magic King.  “My wand doesn’t detect
anything supernatural or magical in this place.”
	“Then what are they--something Super Knight cooked up to scare
	“If you don’t leave my home immediately, your blood will be on my
hands!,” the first ghost vowed, and he held up his hand to reveal
blood on his fingers.
	The surrounding ghosts all held up bloody fingers as well.  Magic
King pointed his want at the ghosts and said some sort of
incantation.  When he finished, the surrounding ghosts all
disappeared, and the first ghost’s appearance changed into a human
	“Villainy!,” exclaimed both Enforcers.
	“That’s my name,” the illusion-producing thief confirmed.  “I thought
Super Knight and I were the only ones who knew about this place, and
since that jerk’s in jail, I’ve been using this place to hide out.  I
see you still have that ugly mustache, magic man.  Well, I’ll be going
	“No way,” said Worm Woman.  “You’re finally going to answer for your
	“You Enforcers don’t want to bother with little old me,” Villainy
said.  “You’re meant to tackle major threats--not just minor league
crooks like I am.”
	“You’re far from minor league,” Magic King told her.  “You’re
probably the best thief in the world.”
	“Well, I was trying to be modest, but thanks for the compliment,
honey,” Villainy laughed.  “You’ll still need to shave off the
mustache if you want to get anywhere with me, though.”
	“I’m not interested in you in that way,” declared Magic King.
	“I doubt that,” Worm Woman muttered under her breath.
	“Not interested?,” Villainy teased.  “I guess those stories about
what a ladies man you are must be wrong, or can’t you handle a
	Worm Woman and Magic King each took an arm and led Villainy to the
lightship.  Villainy would be turned over to the authorities.

	Five jeeps were driving wildly toward the assembly gathered to see
the new super submarine.  The Bulb and the Bouncer knew they had to
protect everyone from whoever was driving the jeeps.  The Bulb clapped
his hands to transform into living light.  He took off at the speed of
light straight at the jeeps.  The Bouncer bounced after him as fast as
he could.  The Bouncer bounced into the back of one jeep.
	“Are you crazy?,” the Bouncer asked the driver.  “Stop this jeep!”
	“No way, man!,” the driver said as he started driving even faster.
	The Bouncer used his elbow to hit the driver in the back of the head
twice.  Then the Bouncer tossed the stunned man out of the jeep.  The
Bouncer carefully eased himself into the driver’s seat.  He had to be
careful so he wouldn’t start bouncing again.  The jeep was going to
crash into a fence, but he was able to turn away from it in time.  The
Bouncer stopped the jeep and looked around.  In the time it had took
for him to stop this one jeep, the Bulb had already done the same to
all four other jeeps.
	“Well done, Bouncer,” the Bulb said.  “We stopped these men before
they were able to hurt anyone.”
	“Bulb, look behind you!,” the Bouncer interrupted.
	The jeeps were only a diversion to draw people away from the Neptune
3000 submarine.  The Bulb turned to see a low-flying helicopter
passing over the sub.  Graybeard and Billy One Leg jumped out of the
helicopter onto it.  Again, the Bulb clapped his hands to become
living light, and he rushed toward the submarine.  The Bouncer
followed after him.  The two pirates had just got the hatch open when
the Bulb got to them.  The Bulb returned to his human form to fight
them.  The Bulb subdued Billy, but then Graybeard caught him in the
side of the head with a kick.  While the Bulb was stunned, Graybeard
quickly tossed him off of the top of the submarine.  The Bulb landed
on the beach.
	“Let’s board her, Billy boy,” Graybeard smiled as he helped his old
first mate up.
	Just then, the Bouncer came bouncing along to crash into Billy.
Billy and the Bouncer fell into the water.
	“I’m sorry, Billy!,” Graybeard called after them.  “I wanted to take
you with me, but I’ve got to go now!”
	Moving quickly, Graybeard boarded the Neptune 3000 and closed the
hatch behind him.
	The Bulb scrambled to his feet.  He saw Billy One Leg swimming back
to shore where a few Navy men were waiting to take him into custody.
Out in the water, the Bouncer was flailing his arms and legs about
	“Help!,” the Bouncer cried.  “I can’t swim!”
	The Bulb swam out to save his fellow Enforcer as the Neptune 3000
	Once the Bulb and Bouncer were back on dry land, the Bouncer
apologized to the Bulb.
	“If you hadn’t gone after me, you might have been able to stop
Graybeard,” the Bouncer said.  “I really messed things up.”
	Before the Bulb could respond, the Neptune 3000 came back up out of
the water.  The hatch opened, and two Navy men dragged Graybeard out
behind them.
	“It’s a lot easier getting in than it is staying in, mister,” one of
them told the pirate.
	Two more Navy men came out of the sub.  These two were carrying a
wounded man.
	“Crewman Harrison needs medical attention!,” one of them exclaimed.
“That pirate shot him!”
	Graybeard had tried to command the skeleton crew aboard the Neptune
3000 by keeping them at gunpoint, but the brave Crewman Harrison had
managed to wrest the gun away from him.  Unfortunately for Harrison,
he was shot by Graybeard in the process, but it could have been far
more serious.  In time, Harrison would be just fine.  Still, the
Bouncer couldn’t help but feel responsible for Harrison’s pain and

More information about the racc mailing list