[Starfall/ACRA] Metal Fire #10, False Maria 04

Martin Phipps martinphipps2 at yahoo.com
Fri Sep 22 15:02:50 PDT 2006

Wil Alambre wrote:
> I expected this issue to fall off the rails, in terms of the entire
> arc. A difference of fur of five years between issues 07-09 and issue
> 10... and even the issues 07-09 were written after stumbling through
> Marlo Vivo 01-04 (which are rougher). I'm trying to "get back into it"
> and will have to relearn everything that was coming easily years ago.
> After re-reading the issue, I would probably have split it up into
> two. Not sure *where* I'd split it up, but that would relieve the
> sudden rush of events and handy wrap-up... most likely issue "10A"
> would have been building the coming physical threat (the gunman) and
> given more time for Ed and Kim "get along", to semi-trust each other.
> "10B" would have been the hacking and shooting issue, wrapping up the
> cliffhanger and the arc.
> New rule of thumb for self: don't be a slave to the original plotted
> outline, don't be afraid to lengthen the arc out. Despite my attempts
> to condense my stories, I should let them drag out if I think they
> need to... at least until "back in the groove". :)

Huh?  Where did you get that I thought that?  Once the action starts,
once you have tension and thrills, this is not the point to go back to
describing furniture. :)  By all means keep it moving.  As I said in
another post, I appreciated the fact that there was less set up as the
series went along.  I'm definitely not asking for this to be divided
into two parts.  In fact, if anything, #10 is shorter than the other
parts, especially the first part.  No, I'm just saying you needed a
bridge between the first scene with Eddy and Kim and the last scene
with Eddy and Kim so the reader knows what was going on in the meantime
and doesn't need to figure it out for himself.  Geez.  I actually
thought some of my criticism for the previous parts was quite harsh.
If anything, you might have wanted to take the time to re-edit the
first three parts rather than simply re-post them.  Here all you needed
was to add some details for clarity but I see no reason to stop in the
middle of the action and break it into two issues.  That's why comic
book arcs often end with double sized issues: there's too much story
left to tell for a regular sized issue and no logical place to break
the issue into two.


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