LNHY: The LNHY Character Roster (updated)
Arthur Spitzer
arspitzer at earthlink.net
Mon Sep 18 20:35:56 PDT 2006
Updated since last time
For more info about LNHY: http://archives.eyrie.org/racc/lnhy/FAQs/
THE LNH Y CHARACTER ROSTER
version 1.07
Last updated September 18, 2006
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THE HEROES:
MEMBERS OF THE LNH:
(All members of the LNH in Looniverse Y are either usable without
permission or public domain.)
NAME: Exclamation!Master!
CREATED BY: Saxon Brenton (saxon.brenton at uts.edu.au)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
SECRET IDENTITY: Robert Melwizcht
POWERS: Speaks dramatically and in a stentorian voice, and when
used as an active attack this causes his opponents to simply trade
bluster with him rather than carry out their nefarious plans - which
is great tactic for minimising property damage or acting as a
distraction while his teammates prepare to clobber them. The more
pompous or bombastic the opponent is, the more likely they are to be
affected by E!M!'s power, however the stronger willed an opponent then
the harder it is to keep them under control.
ADD NOTES: In his costumed identity he acts like 'overgrown boy-
scout'. This can be wildly inappropriate in some situations, but then
incongruity is a mainstay of humour. He acts normal in civvies, though.
APPEARANCE: Big, well-muscled man in a skintight costume wearing
his underwear on the outside.
ENEMIES: Dunno if he's got any arch-nemeses yet - but he did once
chase off the Banjo Duelling Kangaroos, and they seemed pretty
ticked off about it.
FIRST ISSUE: The Daily Super Short-Short Story #43
NAME: Kid Kicked-Out
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
SECRET IDENTITY: Greeve Gaines (Not to be confused with Greef Graves)
POWERS: Kid Kicked-Out has the ability to be kicked-out of superhero
groups which he's done quite a lot in his career. Some of the superhero
groups he's been kicked-out of are Teen Fascists, Before God Guys,
Desperately Desperate Desperadoes, and the World's Worst Heroes. He
also has the ability to be kicked-out of class, out of dimensions, bars,
the army, churches, prison, you name it. If its a place, thing, or
concept that you can be kicked-out of or kicked-off of he can be and
will be. He's also invunerable to any physical injury (although he
feels the pain and is more sensitive to it than the average person).
ADD NOTES: He's currently the leader of the LNH. And female.
APPEARANCE: He has a black and blue colored costume with a 'shoe
print' for an icon on his chest and his back.
ENEMIES: Boot-Head, Baron Buttkicker, Miss Take-In
FIRST ISSUE: Looniverse Y #1
NAME: TROPHY WIFE
Created by: Tom Russell.
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
Real name: Tammy Russell
Age: 35
Powers: Gold-plated and indestructable blonde.
Personality: Sexy and she knows it, an unrelenting
gold-digger. Always on the prowl for the next big
score.
Weakness: White millionaires over the age of eighty.
Also, being gold-plated, she requires a lot of KY.
Group affiliation: LNH
NAME: Van Hel.sig
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
SECRET IDENTITY: Gabriel Van Hel.sig
POWERS: None.
ADD NOTES: Uses a variety of archaic weapons to kill daem-ons and vampires.
APPEARANCE: Has long wavy hair. Looks like he needs a shave and a
bath. Wears Victorian era clothing, a big overcoat and a big hat.
ENEMIES: Swell Boy (who isn't evil but who happens to be a daemon so
Van Hel.sig is always trying to hunt him down and kill him) and other
daemons; RACCula
ALLIES: Buxom the Vampire Slayer, Doctor Peculiar
FIRST ISSUE: Looniverse Y #2
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OTHER HEROES:
NAME: The Before God Guys
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Before there was Superman. Before the Roman Empire.
Before the dinosaurs. Before Jesse Helms. Before God created the
Universe. Before God was even born. They were there. Fighting the
Good Fight. Saving non-existence from itself. And even back then, they
were really, really old. They fly around in a Petrified Plane.
*NAME: The Cheapest Skate
POWERS: Even though he has saved over a zillion dollars in his
very long existence, he's too cheap to spend any of it. This miser has
a superfast rollerskate that goes up to the speed of light. But he only
has one. He was too cheap to buy a second one.
*NAME: Dentures Dan
POWERS: He has the Looniverse's most powerful set of dentures. It
can eat through any material.
*NAME: Doctor I. Forget
POWERS: He's the Before God Guy's resident genius. He's always
forgeting what he's talking about.
*NAME: The Geezer Gorilla
POWERS: He's a talking Gorilla who's a geezer.
*NAME: The Perpetual Virgin
POWERS: He wears mystical underwear that prevents him from aging,
makes him invulnerable to harm, and gives him incredible powers.
Unfortunately the underwear is unremovable, so he's never gotten laid.
*NAME: The Wrinkly Old Bag
POWERS: This very wrinkly old.. um.. lady has this very wrinkly
old bag that she can use to cause wrinkles in time and space. She also
likes to hit people with it. And let me tell you. It really hurts.
ENEMIES: Loud music. Kids. Taxes. The Before Satan Guy.
COWBOY GIRL
Real name: Adrienne McClure
Age: 40
Powers: No real powers per se, though she is a crack
shot and an expert with a lariat.
Personality: Aggressive, takes umbrage to being called
a cowgirl. Very masculine without being butch, prone
to moments of melancholic reflection about the
hardness of the cowboy life.
Weakness: Garth and Ennis.
Created by: Mary Russell.
NAME: The Deadly Serious Squad
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Public Domain
ADD NOTES: The Deadly Serious Squad is deadly serious about being
deadly serious. They're on a mission to advance the superhero genre.
They don't wear costumes. They wear business suits. They don't have
code names or superpowers. And they don't fight supervillains. They
fight 'real' people. They're good at hand to hand combat and the
martial arts. They're thinking about relocating to No-Joke City because
they're finding Net.ropolis Y a bit too silly.
*NAME: Major Lee Serious
ADD NOTES: He's the leader of the team. He's a former major in
the army and is good at military strategy.
*NAME: Barry Serious
ADD NOTES: He's Lee's kid brother. He's good with computers.
*NAME: Bea Serious
ADD NOTES: She's Lee's kid sister. She's good with weapons.
*NAME: Noah Joe King
ADD NOTES: He's the token black guy on the team.
*NAME: General Lee "Dead" Serious
ADD NOTES: He's Lee's dad and the founder of the Deadly Serious
Squad. He gets his nick-name from the fact that he's dead.
ENEMIES: Terrorists, Drug Lords, Banjo Dueling Kangaroos
NAME: Desperately Desperate Desperadoes
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Public Domain (Team concept not characters)
ADD NOTES: These guys are really desperate for anyone to join their
superhero group. So desperate they'll paint your house, baby-sit your
kids, mow your lawn. You name it. They'll do it. They stalk the
houses of ex-members.
*NAME: Wish-I-Were-Dead Man (deceased)
ADD NOTES: Accidentally killed by Kid Kicked-Out
NAME: Dr. Cool J Dog
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Public Domain
POWERS: The ability to be super way cool.
ADD NOTES: Wears a trenchcoat, gold chains around his neck, and has
a Tenor Sax.
FIRST ISSUE: The Way Cool Adventures of Dr. Cool J Dog #1.
NAME: Dr. Stephen Peculiar
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
SECRET IDENTITY: None
POWERS: None, really.
ADD NOTES: Calls upon the "Hairy Hosts of Hogwarts" to do magic
APPEARANCE: Looks like Timothy Dalton with a goatee. Wears red and
yellow flowing robes.
ALLIES: Hosts of Hogwarts (three teenagers, two boys and one girl);
groupies like Amy and Vicky; his agent, a Mr. Wong
ENEMIES: Dir.mandu, Teen Fascists
FIRST ISSUE: Teen Fascists #5
FIGURE 8
Age: 35
Real name: Divine Van Domelen
Powers: Able to split into eight distinct bodies.
(She can't split into four or five or six, just eight,
no more and no less.)
Personality: Dedicated and determined, she is just as
obsessed about suceeding as a hero as she was about
being an professional ice skater. Asks "why" a lot.
Weakness: Knee injuries.
Created by: Tom & Mary Russell.
NAME: Flaming Mutton
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Public Domain
POWERS: The ability to burn anyone who attempts to enter the Garden
of Party Time.
ADD NOTES: She was originally known as Lambsy the Lamb, but was
rewarded by God for telling the truth about what happened in the Vending
Machine of No-Free-Lunches incident by being turned into Flaming Mutton.
She now guards the Garden of Party Time.
FIRST ISSUE: The Daily Super Short-Short Story #17
NAME: God
CREATED BY: ??????
TYPE: Public Domain
POWERS: He can do anything he wants. He's more powerful than any
other person or thing in Looniverse Y.
ADD NOTES: The Before God Guys found a baby on their doorstop and
called him God and raised him. God eventually created Looniverse Y and
planet T-Bone. On planet T-Bone he created the Garden of Party Time
which he filled with animals, sentient clothing, and vending machines.
He created the characters Gotta-Luv-Me Lad, Exciting Leather Strap-on
Lass, and Knows-How-to-Please-Her-Man Girl and eventually kicked each
one of them out of it.
He has a great fear of tall buildings.
APPEARANCE: He's naked most of the time. He has a white beard. And
two noses. And very big breasts.
ENEMIES: Anyone who doesn't worship him.
FIRST ISSUE: The Daily Super Paragraph #1
NAME: Google.mesh
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ALIASES: He.rec.les (to the Greeks), IO.din (to the Norsemen)
POWERS: Immortality, strength
APPEARANCE: Very old, with gray hair and wrinkled skin, but very
healthly and very strong with huge, hulking muscles
ENEMIES: None.
RELATIVES: Jupishur (ancestor, deceased), Dumuzeus (father, deceased),
Thur-Nungal (son, deceased), I.Sig (distant cousin), MegaMetal BlastLord
(descendent, created by Saxon Brenton)
FIRST ISSUE: The Daily Super Short-Short Story #64
NAME: Greef Graves (not to be confused with Greeve Gaines)
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: You may refer to this character. You may have your characters
say they have met him. But you cannot prove that he exists or doesn't
exist.
POWERS: No one knows. Perhaps its the power to make it impossible
for anyone to prove he doesn't or does exist.
ADD NOTES: Every superhero has claimed to have met him. Every
supervillain has claimed to have battled him. Every innocent bystander
has claimed to have been rescued by him. Every woman has claimed to
have slept with him. But no one can prove he exists. He leaves no
footprints or fingerprints. No one knows his age, his race, his
religion, his politics, his nationality, his sexual orientation, or even
his gender (or even his species). The only thing he leaves when he goes
through an oppressed land is freedom and a song in the peoples hearts.
(That song being John Lennon's Imagine). He's like some cross between
Gandhi, Bruce Lee, Muhammad Ali, Elvis Presley, and Pocahontas. Some
conspiracy theorists speculate that he might really be a very clever
supervillain who's using these good deeds to give the world a false
sense of security so they fall into his evil hands.
ENEMIES: Those that would prey on the weak and defenseless.
MACRAMOM
Real name: Arthurina Spitzer
Age: 45
Powers: Able to create any structure out of macrame.
Personality: June Cleaver with occassional flashes of
dry wit. Probably a secret drinker.
Weakness: Compulsive baker.
Created by: Tom Russell.
NAME: MegaMetal BlastLord
CREATED BY: Saxon Brenton (saxon.brenton at uts.edu.au)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
SECRET IDENTITY: Martin Wryce
POWERS: Various powers, deriving from two sources. The Benadanti
powers are basically spiritual and mental in nature (astral
projection, empathy, mind reading, etc). The Nephalim powers are
basically physical (biomechanical shapeshifting).
ADD NOTES: He's a Catholic seminary student who's Benadanti
(astrally travelling werewolf crusader) powers kicked over who he
turned 20, which activated his Nephallim (teenaged giant halfbreed
fallen angel) heritage as well, synergising rather than cancelling
each other out.
APPEARANCE: Black man in his early twenties, with cybernetic
armour and helmet.
ENEMIES: Lisa, Kien, Bel.gzip.bub, the Banjo Duelling Kangaroos,
probably lots of others now that Google.mesh has arrived.
RELATIVES: Google.mesh (distant ancestor) (plus others, for whom
consult Google.mesh's character writeup)
FIRST ISSUE: (as Martin) The Daily Super Short-Short Story #23,
(as MegaMetal BlastLord) The Daily Super Short-Short Story #45
PUSSY GIRL
Real name: Martine Phipps
Age: 16
Powers: Able to communicate with cats and to give them
commands. Now, as to whether or not the cats are
going to follow her commands, on the other hand... I
mean, come on. They're cats. They don't listen to
nobody.
Personality: Cheerful and bubbly, somewhat naive.
Often makes double entendres without realizing it.
Weakness: see powers.
Created by: Mary Russell.
RED TONJA
Real name: Jessica Willey
Age: 30
Powers: Constantly on her period, it fuels her
berserker rage. She uses tampons as weapons, either
as blunt-force projectiles (like throwing knives, but,
not sharp and, well, tampons) or as bolas (two or more
tampon strings tied together).
Personality: Quickly irritable and bitchy warrior
woman, though she is prone to sudden mood swings in
which she is unsure of herself and asks constantly if
she looks pretty or if she's smart.
Weakness: Requires a lot of fluids to keep herself
from dehydrating.
Created by: Tom & Mary Russell.
NAME: Teen Fascists
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Public Domain (Team concept not characters)
ADD NOTES: This is a group of fine clean-cut civic minded young
people who will do whatever it takes to make the world a more orderly
place. They won't let pesky things like the Bill of Rights or the
Constitution get in the way of justice. And they will make sure the
trains run on time.
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
*Unification Man, the leader of the Teen
Fascists, dedicated to the ideals of truth, justice,
liberty and the belief in God, all of which were
fundamental principles held by our founding fathers!
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
*Militia Man, who's job it is to supply us with arms
and, at the same time, see to it that similar weapons
don't make it into the hands of our devil worshipping
enemies!
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
*Search and Seizure, twin girls with the uncanny
ability to not only break into a person's home but
find devil worshipping paraphernalia in it (or plant
it, if necessary, in cases where no real evidence
exists but we can just tell who the devil worsphippers
are!)
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
*Double Jeopardy, an expert young investigator who
specializes in cases where people who we _knew_ were
devil worshippers somehow managed to escape justice
the first time around!
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
*The Detender, a superhumanly strong
nigh-invulnerable teen who is the groups token big
guy.
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
*Judge, an empath with an uncanny sense about
people. Like I said, we _know_ who the devil
worshippers are.
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
and Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at aol.com)
*Cruel and Unusual, twin brothers with amazing
abilities in both armed and unarmed combat!
ENEMIES: The ACLU, SAGneto, and anything not approved by
right-wing talk radio.
NAME: World's Worst Heroes
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
and Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Public Domain (Team concept not characters)
ADD NOTES: In his will, Professor World bequeathed his entire fortune,
including his mansion and estate in upstate Net.York to the formation of
a super team to protect humanity. It was up to the executor of the
will, a Mr. Leroy Laurel, to recruit heroes for the team. Mr. Leroy
Laurel then effectively became the leader of this new team, receiving a
monthly stipend of one thousand dollars coming from the Professor's
estate. The will stated that the team should consist of at least seven
active members in order for Leroy Laurel to qualify for his monthly
stipend. The will did not specify any standards for the team, however,
so Leroy Laurel cynically recruited the World's Worst Heroes. With the
World's Worst Heroes captured by Doctor Apocalypse (name suggested by
Rob Rogers), Leroy Laurel had to quickly recruit a new team, the All
bad, Even Worse, World's Worst Heroes.
ENEMIES: Mr. Serious, Doctor Apocalypse
FIRST APPEARANCE: Looniverse Y #3
*NAME: Fairy
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Having been effeminate all his life, Fairy's code name was
given to him by his elementary school classmates.
*NAME: Cryalot
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Cries a lot.
*NAME: Least
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Least powerful super hero of all time: could lose a fight
with a new born baby.
*NAME: Pathetic Girl
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Just stands there trying to move things with her mind, but can't.
*NAME: Liceman
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Ability to shed lice comes from not having taken a bath or a
shower in years.
*NAME: Hack
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Coughs a lot. Brother of Cryalot.
*NAME: Pola.rec
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Girlfriend of Hack.
*NAME: Worserine
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Tries to incapacitate his enemies with his bad breath.
*NAME: Stone
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Throws stones at oppenents. Wears gothic clothes and has
body piercings.
*NAME: Nightcrapper
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Carries bags of human waste to hurl at opponents.
*NAME: Lungshot
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Asthma prevents Lungshot from fighting. He throws playing
cards instead.
*NAME: Dazed
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: A former fashion model and would be pop star, Dazed has
discovered she can't hack it as a superhero either.
*NAME: Confused
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Boyfriend of Dazed.
*NAME: Sighalot
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Sighs a lot. Has the ability to wear skimpy costumes that
just barely manage to fall within the limits of comics code approval.
************************************************************************
************************************************************************
THE VILLAINS:
THE SYSTEM CORRUPTERS:
(All members of the System Corrupters in Looniverse Y are either usable
without permission or public domain.)
NAME: SAGneto
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
SECRET IDENTITY: (stage name) Eric Murdock
POWERS: Unknown.
ADD NOTES: He's currently the leader of the Screen Actor's Guild.
APPEARANCE: He wears a red suit with a red cape and a red metal
helmet with horns.
ALLIES: The Baldwin Brothers (Alec, Billy, Stephen and Daniel) and
Michael Moore
ENEMIES: The Teen Fascists
FIRST ISSUE: Teen Fascists #1
************************************************************************
THE OTHER VILLAINS:
NAME: The Banjo Dueling Kangaroos (Ben and Joe)
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
POWERS: They've got banjos. And they know how to use them.
ADD NOTES: They are the enemies of fine art and great literature.
They seek to destroy any serious attempt to elevate the superhero genre
with their absurd silliness and banjo duels. They particularly like to
harrass the Deadly Serious Squad.
APPEARANCE: They wear straw-hats and nothing else.
NAME: The Banana Daiquiri-Drinking Man
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Ask for permission first
POWERS: No one knows.
ADD NOTES: Do you know what evil is? Do you know what heart
stopping, baby eating, kitten juggling evil is? Until you've met the
The Banana Daiquiri-Drinking Man you'll never truely know the meaning of
the word 'evil'. He is the darkness in our hearts. He's the sound
outside that we're to scared to check on. Parents like to warn their
children that if they don't eat their veggies or if they don't behave,
the Banana Daiquiri-Drinking Man will get them. (There is no proof that
the Banana Daiquiri-Drinking Man bases his victim list on whether or not
someone ate their veggies or if they they misbehaved). He likes a good
Banana Daiquiri. He's a large man that is obscured in shadows.
ENEMIES: All that is good and decent.
FIRST ISSUE: Looniverse Y #1
NAME: Before Satan Guy
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Hell was not created as the dominion of Satan.
It existed before he had ever been created let alone
banished from Heaven. In those days, it was the
dominion of the Before Satan Guy. With Satan having
asserted his control over Hell, there was little for the
Before Satan Guy to do. Occasionally, he would do battle
with the Before God Guys, just for old times sake, but he
was, for the most part, now retired.
APPEARANCE: Looks like Satan but very old and wrinkly.
ENEMIES: Before God Guys, Swell Boy
FIRST ISSUE: Looniverse Y #3
NAME: Doctor Apocalypse
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
POWERS: Unspecified.
ADD NOTES: Doctor Apocalypse had forged an empire
in the South Pacific centered around Apocalypse
Island. With the world's attention focused on I.rec
and North Ko.rec.a, few people paid any attention to
Doctor Apocalypse's gradual annexation of small
islands in the South Pacific until the day when Doctor
Apocalypse spoke at the United Nations and demanded
the official recognition of the United Federation of
Apocalypse. Thus did Doctor Apocalypse cause the
world's attention to be focused on his kingdom.
ADD.ADD.NOTE: Name inspired by Rob Rogers.
APPEARANCE: Unspecified, but presumably a cross between Marvel's Doctor
Doom and Apocalypse.
ENEMIES: Deadly Serious Squad, World's Worst Heroes
FIRST ISSUE: Looniverse Y #3
NAME: Exciting Leather Strap-on Lass
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Ask for permission first
ADD NOTES: She was Gotta-Luv-Me Lad's first girlfriend made from his
second nose.
FIRST ISSUE: The Daily Super Short-Short Story #5
NAME: Giga.bit *Queen of the Bikini Damned*
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
POWERS: She was a vampire and she had a bikini which could enslave
men's minds.
ADD NOTES: Back in the 60's she was this big TV star. She had this
show called 'Giga.bit' about these teenagers who would do nothing, but
have beach blanket parties and go to malt shops. Sometime in the 70's
she was turned into a vampire by RACCula. She became one of the most
powerful vampires in the world. Almost at RACCula's level. She called
herself: Giga.bit, Queen of the Bikini Damned. Buxom the Vampire Slayer
finally slayed her. Buxom now has her Bikini That Enslaves Men's Minds.
ENEMIES: Buxom the Vampire Slayer.
FIRST ISSUE: Looniverse Y #5
NAME: I.sig
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: In Looniverse Y, I.sig is the ex-wife/distant cousin of
Google.mesh and the mother of his sons Thur and Bal.dir. I.sig was
responsible for Ragan.org, the event described in Norse Mythology as
being responsible for the deaths of Google.mesh, Thur and Bal.dir,
amongst others. Upon learning that Google.mesh was still alive, I.sig
made three more attempts on Google.mesh's life. I.sig is currently
bound from doing any more harm by a spell placed on her by Doctor Peculiar.
ADD.ADD.NOTES: In a recent thread on sci.anthrology, it was revealed
that Ianna/Ishtar/Isis may have been the wife of the real life Sumarian
king Dumuzi who most likely would have been Gilgamesh's older brother
(which then made Gilgamesh next in line for the throne). The legend of
Isis may have inspired the legends of other goddesses including (likely)
Venus and (possibly) Hela.
APPEARANCE: Looking damn good given she's five centuries old.
ENEMIES: Google.mesh, Doctor Peculiar
ALLIES: Bee.gzip.bub
FIRST ISSUE: Google.mesh #2 (in a flashback)
NAME: Madam Middle Finger
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Public Domain
POWERS: She likes to give people the finger. And she's really big.
ADD NOTES: She's a giant female that rides shotgun with the Road
Rager. It's not quite clear what the exact relationship between them
is. Are they lovers, related, or just good friends? Or perhaps she's a
hitchhiker. She rides in a gigantic SUV and likes to shout profanity.
She was created by Master Root of All Evil. Please feel free to kill
this character off.
FIRST ISSUE: Looniverse Y #1
NAME: Master Root of All Evil
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
SECRET IDENTITY: Barry M. O'Roll
POWERS: He has the ability to think of any supervillains and make
them exist. Sometimes the supervillains have weapons or vehicles. The
supervillains usually have their own retconned histories and most of the
time are not aware that he created them.
ADD NOTES: His dad was a Satanic Televangelist. And his mom was a
Pantomime Instructor. He has a birth mark that spells 'EVIL' right on
the back of his neck. When he was six years-old, he lost all of his
hair. By the age of ten, he had grown a goatee. When he was in college
he tried to get an orange soda from a vending machine, but instead
recieved a root beer. The Rootbeer of All Evil. Drinking the rootbeer
he became Master Root of All Evil. There was a time for a couple of
years that he reformed and didn't use his powers, but Looniverse Y #1
showed him creating The Road Rager and Madam Middle Finger going back to
his evil ways. He's good friends with Kid Kicked-Out and knows Kid
Kicked-Out's secret identity. And Kid Kicked-Out like wise knows his
secret id.
APPEARANCE: He wears this brown costume and has a utility built with
different types of roots. Carrots, Parsnips, Turnips, if it's a root he
has it. He uses them as weapons.
NAME: Mr. Serious
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
POWERS: None.
ADD NOTES: He grew up in No Joke City and had been
raised to believe that he should avoid any silly
situations like superhero / supervillain battles. Mr.
Serious longed for the day when his villainy would
attract the attention of the Deadly Serious Squad.
The Deadly Serious Squad, however, never considered
Mr. Serious, ironically, to be a serious enough
threat. Instead, he became the arch enemy of the World's
Worst Heroes.
APPEARANCE: Wears a business suit.
ENEMIES: World's Worst Heroes
FIRST ISSUE: Looniverse Y #3
NAME: Mysterious Shadowy Messing-with-Destiny Dude
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
POWERS: He can mess with people's destiny. He also has access to a
lot of weird items.
ADD NOTES: He's a mercenary that works for anyone that can pay his
price. He's been to many alternate universes. The Banana
Daiquiri-Drinking Man paid him to give an LNH briefcase to Greef Graves,
but instead he gave it to Kid Kicked-Out.
APPEARANCE: Wears a black trenchcoat and black hat.
FIRST ISSUE: Looniverse Y #1
NAME: The Road Rager
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Public Domain
POWERS: He's a big giant with a big gun.
ADD NOTES: He's a giant who drives a very big SUV. He's also in a
very big hurry to get to places and really hates drivers who are too
slow. He likes to shoot drivers who are in his way with his Traffic
Management Gun which is the size of a tank. He also likes to honk his
horn. He's currently riding with some gal named Madam Middle Finger. He
was created by Master Root of All Evil. Please feel free to kill this
character off.
ENEMIES: Cars, Pedestrians, Anyone that's in shooting distance.
FIRST ISSUE: Looniverse Y #1
NAME: Roster Leech
CREATED BY: ????????? (????????@????.com)
TYPE: ???????
POWERS: The ability to never get used in a story. And also the ability
to remain on a Character Roster List without worring about ever being
deleted from it even though it never appears in any stories.
ENEMIES: People who hate wasted bandwith.
NAME: Satan
CREATED BY: Martin Phipps (martinphipps2 at yahoo.com)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
ADD NOTES: Satan was one of the first angels created by God. God
banished Satan to Hell when Satan refused to obey God's commandment for
angels "Thou shalt not touch human women".
APPEARANCE: Red with horns.
ENEMIES: Just about everybody.
ALLIES: Bee.gzip.bub
FIRST ISSUE: Google.mesh #1
NAME: The Wondersock
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Usable Without Permission
POWERS: The ability to possess people when they put him on their foot.
ADD NOTES: He tempted Knows-How-to-Please-Her-Man Girl into eating
from the Vending Machine of No-Free-Lunches. For this crime God
punished him and all socks by forcing them to be worn on human feet.
Currently he's the Lord of the Anti-Party Time Zone.
ENEMIES: God and Human Feet.
FIRST ISSUE: The Daily Super Short-Short Story #11
************************************************************************
************************************************************************
THE WILDCARDS:
NAME: Dr. Idius O'Stupid Agottawork
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Public Domain
POWERS: He's the biggest expert in the field of Stupidology. He's
very good at thinking of ideas that are so stupid they will probably work.
FIRST ISSUE: Looniverse Y #1
NAME: Gotta-Luv-Me Lad
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Ask for permission first
POWERS: The ability to make readers love him.
ADD NOTES: Created by God, Gotta-Luv-Me Lad was the first human
being and the father of mankind on Planet T-Bone.
FIRST ISSUE: The Daily Super Paragraph #2
NAME: Knows-How-to-Please-Her-Man Girl
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Ask for permission first
POWERS: The ability to please her man.
ADD NOTES: She was Gotta-Luv-Me Lad's second girlfriend made from
his melon-sized breasts.
FIRST ISSUE: The Daily Super Short-Short Story #7
NAME: St. wReavenger Van Saxdrippseel McHuberyike III
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Public Domain
ADD NOTES: He (or She) wrote the 'Everything You Always Wanted To
Know About The LNH, But Were Afraid To Ask' manual.
NAME: Ted the Time-traveling Atheist
CREATED BY: Arthur Spitzer (arspitzer at earthlink.net)
TYPE: Public Domain
POWERS: Has time traveling powers
ADD NOTES: He went back in time and met Gotta-Luv-Me Lad and
Knows-How-to-Please-Her-Man Girl in the Garden of Party Time.
FIRST ISSUE: The Daily Super Short-Short Story #8
NAME: TJ (Timmy-Joe Jim-Bob)
CREATED BY: Saxon Brenton (saxon.brenton at uts.edu.au)
TYPE: Useable Without Permission
POWERS: Mutant with moderately enhanced strength, speed, agility
and resilience.
ADD NOTES: He's a mugger who was possessed by Damian the Wondersock
when the latter was searching for Martin Wryce, and who stuck around
to help defeat Damian and his demonic allies. His Secret Origin about
how he came to spend his latter teenaged years in a concentration camp
is in The Daily Super Short-Short Story #54. The important thing to
remember about TJ is that he's no longer completely messed in the head.
FAMILY: Parents; Greg, Alex (brothers), Tammy (sister), Josie
(sister, deceased).
FIRST ISSUE(S): The Daily Super Short-Short Story #20-21.
************************************************************************
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