LNH: Haiku Gorilla # 214

[Tom Russell]

Martin Phipps wrote:
> Tom Russell wrote:
> > We interrupt the current storyline for the following autobiographical
> > indulgence.
> >
> > HAIKU GORILLA # 214
> >
> > Tom's hand hurts real bad
> > twenty-four hour comic day
> > ouch, ouch, says the wind
>
> Martin's hand hurts bad
> Wife been away for long time
> Now she can take over

You forgot the kigo.

But now is as good a time as any to introduce the HAIKU GORILLA
FAN-FICTION CONTEST!

As we all know, January is APES MONTH!  Last January gave us many great
stories and one bad one-- the one that introduced Haiku Gorilla, "Just
Imagine Saxon Brenton's RACCies Again # 2".

Now, come this APES MONTH, I'll be posting three TEBs, collecting all
of this year's storylines-- Unjaned Melody (# 3-64), The Death of Pants
Rabbit Lad (# 65-123), and the on-going Support Your Local Gorilla.

Unfortunately, this author won't be writing any _new_ Haiku Gorilla
stories until the Spring of next year.

"But Tom!" you plead: "How can it be Apes Month without new Haiku
Gorilla stories?"

I have heard your concerns (before you even knew you had them) and have
come up with a solution-- the HAIKU GORILLA FAN-FICTION CONTEST!

During Apes Month, I authorize any person on RACC, new or old, to write
any story they like featuring Haiku Gorilla.  It can take place in an
alternate world, or one close to the Looniverse we know and love.  You
can kill him off, write him poorly, whatever you want!

If the story is good and _does_ fit into mainstream LNH continuity, and
if I like it, it might even be declared canon after the fact!  That
sounds tasty, right?

So here are the rules:

1.  Stories must be in haiku form!  Three lines, five-seven-five
syllables, and a kigo (or season word).

2. You can tell a one-shot story, or serialize it, or post multiple
haikus at once.  But please make sure you restrict your story to a
single thread-- we don't need sixty-five different topics for a
sixty-five haiku story. :-)

3. You can use _any_ of my characters, even ones I don't usually let
people use, because, hey, it's out of continuity anyway-- unless I
decide otherwise.

4.  It must feature Haiku Gorilla.  After all, it _is_ Apes Month!
Which brings us to rule number five:

5.  The Haiku Gorilla Fan-Fiction Contest is only during Apes Month.
Not before, and not after!

Hopefully, you'll write your own stories about your own apes during
Apes Month as well!  But in an attempt to drum up participation this
Apes Month, I'm providing an opportunity for those who have a bit of
writer's block.  With the Haiku Gorilla Fan-Fiction Contest, there is
now _no excuse_ for _not_ participating in Apes Month!

>
> Interpret that as you will. :)

Obviously, your wife does most of the cooking and now you've had to do
all cooking-- including stirring-- yourself, causing great pain in your
hand.
> 
> Martin

==Tom