[REPOST/LNH] Saviors of the NET # Pi

Arthur Spitzer arspitzer at earthlink.net
Tue Apr 4 17:37:11 PDT 2006

Okay.  I did put the actual number of Pi and kind of
Fixed Tom's ASCII Graphics.  (at least I think I did)
Everything else is probably the same.

Author:    TIFFER003
Email:     tiffer003 at aol.com
Date:      1998/10/08
Forums:    rec.arts.comics.creative

___                    |/  \
|  | S A V I O R S #    \__/  |
|__| F THE   NET       |      |
                       |      |

 + The Saviors of the Net"
       Equals Big Trouble for the LNH

        My name is Joan St. Claire, and I used to be a member of the Saviors
of the Net.  USED to be being the point I want to emphasize.  Our plan was
so simple .. . yet, as luck would have it, it was too simple.  Simple enough
for a child to discover.  That simple.  Our problem was that a child did.
        No one knows why the unfortunate hacker had decided to go into our
system, but once Alt. Lord discovered, he had to be silenced.  I protested.
Alt. Lord stripped me of my powers, beat me and tossed me into the street
with a warning: tell anyone and you'll be smothered into the pavement.  It
was a quite disturbing visual, to be sure.
        I watched on television as Alt. Lord and the others . . . their
identities changed so that if I did leak any information, than they wouldn't
be found out . . . made themselves known.  I knew I had to do something.
        In this diary, there is the key to defeating all of the Saviors of
the Net, and their plans, outlined in detail.  I need to get it to the
Legion.  But if one of them finds me, and eliminates me, then I'll have to
hope that some person on the street finds it and carries out the mission.
It's a slim chance, and because of that, I'm the only hope for the Legion.
        I may have lost the powers I had as Arc, but I can still fight.
        I hope.

        Five minutes had passed in the LNH control deck as Deductive Logic
Man and the Ultimate Ninja looked at the screen.  Self- Righteous Preacher
had been leading a rally there, when he was shot in the back of the head.
There was a sudden gasp about the crowd as he fell to the ground.
        The Saviors of the Net appeared on the scene immediately.  Captain
Killfile pointed to the area where the shot had come from, and up there was
a large man with a huge Afro.  Sparkling white teeth and a canine overbite,
he laughed evilly as he revealed a gun from his large, flowing, papal robes.
        The Ninja's eyes narrowed.  "Turn back the tape."
        "All right," said Deductive Logic Man, "and I think I know what
you're asking for.  I follow you.  You see, when we saw the sniper, it was
Dr. Killfile who was aiming for the preacher's head.  But now, this is
someone new . . ."
        "No, it's not."
        "It's not?"
        "Look here," the Ninja said.  "Access the anime- related files."
        "All right," said Deductive Logic Man.  A handful of names popped
        "Open Fuzzboy's file."
        "Okay . . . blast!  That is Fuzzboy!"
        "Not quite," said the Ninja.  "He's slightly taller."
        "I deduce that we should do a height comparison between the two
        "Do it."
        "Just a moment . . ."
        The Ninja scratched his chin.
        "Yes.  The apparent assassin is four feet tall, while Fuzzboy is
barely 3 feet tall."
        The screen flipped back to the scene, as the Saviors of the Net
chased Fuzzboy off.
        "It's a fake."
        "Yes.  But does he have any doppelgangers?"
        "Yes, he does.  But that one's six feet tall with a white Afro.
Eyes are two shades brighter as well."
        "How can you tell that-oh, wait.  Your ninja senses."
        The Ninja nodded slightly.
        "What now?"
        "Your plan of attack was sound, Deductive Logic Man.  However, I
think it might have to be modified a bit.  First, summon Fuzzboy and Manga
Girl here."
        "All right."
        "I want them to find Very Disturbed Scary Creature Man.  He's the
only member who's not present.  I want him found, and I want Fuzzboy to
clear his name."
        "That sounds sound, for lack of better terms."
        "Good.  Now, summon Nudist Man."
        "Nudist Man?"
        "Yes.  He will infiltrate their ranks.  And he hasn't a mask to
unmask, so the Legion loses nothing."
        "But what if they kill him?"
        "As I said, the Legion loses nothing."
        "I'm going to McLaughlin's studio.  I have a hunch."
        "Ah.  But what about Self- Righteous Preacher, sir?"
        The Ninja was silent.  "What's done is done."
        "That sounds awfully cold of you, sir."
        "Fine.  How about this?  Let's get those bastards who killed Self-
Righteous Preacher?"
        The Ninja left.
        Deductive Logic Man stroked his chin.  "Now, how should I revise the
        The television blipped on as a commercial appeared.
        Three identical little girls appeared on the screen.
        "Do you need money?"
        "Have you been injured in an accident?"
        "Do you want to sue someone for all that they've got?"
        "Well, we're Sister . . ."
        "Sister . . ."
        "And Sister . . ."
        "We're all Sisters!" said all of them in unison.
        "We're the Three Annoying Little Sisters," spoke up one.
        "ATTORNEYS AT LAW!" they all spoke at once.
        Deductive Logic Man began dialing a phone number appearing at the
bottom of the screen.

        "Holy Carrie Fisher!" cried Fuzzboy.  "This sucks!"
        "Will you stop whining?"
        "I'm not whining!"
        "You are too," Manga Girl scolded.  "We'll find whoever is behind
this.  We always do."
        "I . . . I guess so."
        "What d'ya mean, I guess so?"
        Manga Girl stopped her flying cloud and Fuzzboy stopped his rooftop
        "Well, Mango, I'm kind of worried about . . . us."
        "That is the lamest line I've ever heard."
        "It's also true," Fuzzboy said with a meek expression on his face.
        "Why are you worried about us?"
        "Well, first of all, your always-always-always flirting!"
        "What do you mean, so?  That makes me jealous!"
        "You're cute when you're jealous."
        "That's not the point."
        "Then what is?"
        "I care about you Mango, I love you, but . . . I don't want to have
to compete with other people for you."
        "Fuzzy . . ."
        There was a silence for a few moments.  Manga Girl started up on her
cloud again.
        "Let's go."
        "But . . ."
        "Let's go, Fuzzy.  We'll talk about it after we nab these guys."
        " . . ."
        "Are you coming or not?  We have a very disturbed scary creature to
        "Let's go, Mango."

        McLaughlin Man sat in his dressing room, straightening his tie.  As
he did, he found something sharp appear by his throat.
        "Ultimate Ninja," McLaughlin said with disgust.  "What do you want?
Afraid of the Saviors?"
        "In no way, shape, or form, McLaughlin.  I want answers.  I want
them now."
        "Now?  Mighty demanding, aren't we?"
        "My patience is as thin as you are fat.  Answers . . . now."  The
Ninja shoved McLaughlin into the mirror, not breaking it, and grabbed hold
of his hair.
        "I'm sorry to result to such violent, drastic measures.  I want
        "I . . .I . . ."
        "About your show, not your Saviors.  We'll find out enough about
them soon enough."
        "How many cameras does your show use?"
        "Excellent.  Is there a delay from feed to home?"
        "Y-yes . . . about thirty seconds . . ."
        "Good."  The Ninja plopped the man back into his seat, took a jelly
donut, and stuffed it in McLaughlin's mouth.  "Eat."

        "You want to join the Saviors?" asked Captain Killfile, curious.
She looked at Nudist Man.  He looked at her.
        "Yes, yes I do," said Nudist Man.
        "Why?" asked Mood Arrow, narrowing his eyebrow.
        "All of the people around LNHQ . . . all of the women . . . they
always look at me and my body."
        "I think I know why," Dr. Net.ropolis said.
        Captain Killfile looked extremely sad for Nudist Man.  "We won't
treat you
like that."
        "That's right.  US strongly disagrees with the whole idea of . . .
well, you
        "So . . . does that mean I can join?" asked Nudist Man.
        "Of course," said Captain Killfile, grinning evilly.  "After your
renounce the
Legion, that is."
        "I-I will, Captain Killfile!  I will!"
        "Excellent," whispered the Ultimate Savior, seeing the scene from
the shadows.

        The body of Self- Righteous Preacher lay in the morgue, having been
examined.  He was dead.  Cannon Fodder couldn't believe it.  "It's too bad,
SRP.  Happens every once in a while."
        He turned, crying.
        A hand fell on his shoulder and he turned back.  "Self- Righteous
Preacher!  You-you're alive!"
        "No," said the body in an unearthly voice.  "HE Is DEAD! Now there
is only VICE!"
        A blast of black energy left a large hole in Cannon Fodder.
        He died.

        The Ninja returned to the control room.  "Deductive Logic Man?"
        "Yes, Ultimate Ninja?"
        "Your theory has been disproved.  McLaughlin has a thirty-second
delay and four different cameras.  Ample time for a director to cut between
the most logical shots.  So the Saviors of the Net would have an alibi."
        "Ah," said Deductive Logic Man.  "I've decided to try out a new,
more American approach."
        "Such as?"
        Deductive Logic Man heard a knock on the door.  "There it is now."
        He opened it, and three six- year- old, identical girls in business
suits appeared.
        "We're Sister . . ."
        "Sister . . ."
        And Sister . . ."
        "We're going to sue them."

NEXT TIME: I don't know!  I'm probably not writing it!

Notes:  Vice is Self- Righteous Preacher's repressed dark side, last seen in
the horribly written Malingerer Lad and Teenfactor # 20.  Basically he's
completely, totally evil, hits and abuses women, children, etc.  Every last
sin in the world?  That's Vice personified.  Have fun.

Manga Girl and Fuzzboy, for this crossover and this crossover only, are
declared public domain.  If you want to use them somewhere else, ask me.

 Same deal with the Three Annoying Little Sisters and Nudist Man.
Basically, the deal is with the former that they ruin everyone and
everything they try to do for anyone.  They're related to Lwo Ispep.  Nudist
Man is left over from the 60's, not much on him.

I just created Joan, aka Arc, and any moron can see where I got the name
from.Anyway, she's just for this crossover and has the same kind of deal as
Mango and Fuzzy do.

This was a 48 minute comic, which is a variation of a 24 minute comic.

1998 Copyright Tom Russell Jnr.

Ultimate NInja: Ray Bingham
Deductive Logic Man: Not Reserved
The Saviors: Arthur Spitzer/ Not Reserved

Tom Russell Jnr.

"Let us never mention Batman again."
"What did I tell you about mentioning Batman? SLAP SLAP SLAP"
--Me, talking to Kieran O' Callaghan

NEXT TIME:  Saviors of the NET #4: Which way is up? By Mike
===========   McMullan

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