[LNH/LNH2/Acra] Vel #3

cabbagewielder at yahoo.com cabbagewielder at yahoo.com
Wed Jan 5 12:55:10 PST 2005

Five thousand years before the mighty savior of the Dorfs was born, he
arrived from The Beyond Time to help his people in their hour of need.
He foretold the coming of a great evil.   Within weeks, he had
banished it from our time.    Then, after the tremendous battle, The
Great One vanished into mountains.   The legends say he will never be
seen again.   I pray, not just for myself but for all Dorfs, that this
is not true.
So I climb Mount Conquest.   I climb and I climb until I reach the
Cave of Readiness.   The water from the melting snowcaps is all I hear.
I hope he has not already left.   I approach the darkened mouth of
the cave.  I slowly walk in.

"What brings you here, Shaman Haz," the savior says.
"I traveled for two weeks straight.   Our kingdom, and perhaps even
the emperor himself, is under attack from a deadly enemy," I tell
"This is my concern because?" the savior asks.
"You are the Savior of the Dorfan people.   You are a great
champion," I say.
"I do what is best for The Beyond Time.   I seek to correct a milady
of fate," the savior says.

I turn away from him.   He, our great savior and herald, speaks
blasphemous words.   That The Beyond Time is not a great paradise.
The words disgust me.  Yet, the words come from The Great One himself.
How can they be considered blasphemy?  No... no... that way lies
madness.  The Beyond Time is good.   It is the destined dominion of the
Dorfan Empire, reachable via the fire pits of Dorfia.

"Milady, m'lord?" I ask.
"Yes.  An entire world destroyed by The Great Evil," the savior
"I see.  Surely is if you destroy the enemy...," I say before he
cuts me off.
"Who is this enemy?"
"Zendok of Clan Laroque.  I'm sure if you help us, many will
enlist to aid you in protecting The Beyond Time," I say.
"No, Haz.  The Beyond Time has already occurred.  We are the
present," the savior says.

I stare at the savior in a rather confused fashion.

"I do not understand m'lord," I say.
"Let's hope you never do."

Vel #3
A Prologue to Schroedinger's Planet
By Jesse N. Willey

Marcia Holt was not having a good day.  She was coming in late to work
at her large apartment and boarding house.  Aaron, her ex-lover, had
died a few days earlier in a car accident.   Meanwhile, her ex-husband
Brad had finally signed the divorce papers.  She'd lost one of the
other properties she managed in the divorce.   Sure, she got the
Ferrari and the beach house in the Virginia Beach, but she would have
really liked that little old movie theater.  The grubby little bastard
had run off his some weather girl and turned it into a small two screen
place to see the latest blockbusters.   Her plan had always been to
turn it into a revival house and show old movies.  Trip to the Moon,
The Magnificent Ambersons.   Maybe some old Keystone Cops shorts just
to be goofy.  But no, the weasel had to take that dream from her.  It
was why she hooked up with Aaron in the first place.  To make matters
worse, it was her thirty second birthday.
She heard the creek of wheels rolling across the tiles.   She turned
to hear a voice.

"No.. Carina... I'm not seeing Jen.  It's just that you and I
are... over... I need time to..." he said.
"Vel?  Is that you?" Marcia said.
"I gotta go, Carina.  Talk to you never," he said switching off
the communication card.  "Yeah, it's me.  I was just finishing up.
I gotta go pack.  It's my last day."
"Still planning on leaving?" she said as she blew the onyx black
bangs off her forehead.
"Too bad.  I'll miss having you around.  How about I come by in
about an hour and cook you dinner," she said.
"I'm sure you've got a lot on your mind and..."
"I'll see ya then," she said.


I sit the cave, captivated by the Savior's words.   I know they are
abhorrent.  They go against centuries of religious training.   He
speaks his words with such passion and gusto that I know them to be
something else: the horrid and wretched truth.  I crave each syllable.
Drool in anticipation for each word.

"So, tell me more about The Beyond Time," I ask.
"I can not say much.   Such knowledge in the wrong hands could be
disastrous.  The Beyond Time is much like the present.   It is
interesting... in the Chinese sense," The Savior says.
"Chinese, M'lord?" I say.

The savior frowns a bit.

"As in China.   A country on the world of my father," The Savior
"I don't see the relevance," I say.
"Well, there is this old curse... oh nevermind.   The Beyond Time is
simply the future.  It is no different from now or earlier in any
sense," The Savior said.
"I don't see how any of this affects why you cannot help us," I
"Haz, the simplistic way to explain it is causality," The Savior
"Yes, one event affects another.  Certain events must happened in
the future, or The Beyond Time, or whatever you want to call it.
Otherwise things will play out in such away that I never have came to
this era to fight The Great Evil," The Savior says.
"I don't understand.  You already vanquished The Great Evil," I
"Precisely Haz.  Which means I don't interfere," The Savior
says.   "It's the Anthropic Principle.  The universe must exist the
way we observe it, otherwise we wouldn't be here to observe it."

I head back for the mouth of the cave.

"Then I must bid you farewell, M'Lord.   As you said during my
last visit, Moakonzi helps those who help themselves," I say.
"Aren't you going to take the fast way?" The Savior says.
"The fast way?"
"So many questions Haz.  In The Beyond Time, you are a great hero.
We wouldn't want to be late for your greatest battle, would we?"
The Savior says.
"No, we wouldn't," I say.

The savior pulls out a small wooden chariot without horses that was
barely large enough for one man.

"Let's walk over to a snowy portion of the mountain.  I'll give
you push.   Be careful, the sled could break when it gets to solid
rock.  It should still shed at least a few days from your journey,"
The Savior says.


Marcia awoke at sunrise.  The light blared down.   She was still in
Vel's room.  Vel himself had left sometime earlier.   She didn't
remember much.  The fine dining and cheap wine.  Vel drinking out of
some sort of coconut shell.   The Chaplin movies on DVD.   Then things
got a little blurry.  Except the names they called each other in the
night.  They were anything but their own.   Of course, they both knew
what it was going into it.
There was a loud knock on the door.  Her head ached.  She suspected
she was hung over.   She quickly got some clothes on and went to answer
it.  The knocking continued to get louder.

"This is the Legion of Net.Heroes.  Open up!" came a young man's

She remembered Vel saying he had been a part of the Legion.  Only he
had quit some time ago and not exactly on the best of terms with some
of the key members.   What were they doing here?  She opened the door.
Two women of medium height stood at the door accompanied by a short
man, who had gone from banging on the door to accidentally banging on
Marcia's stomach.

"Let me guess..." Marcia said.  She turned to one of the women who
was wearing a white jumpsuit. "Carina... and you must be Jen."
"Don't forget me, I'm Onion Lad," the man said.
"So, Vel talked about us?" Jen said.
"Uh... all the time.  You in particular," Marcia said.

Sing Along Lass let out a harrumph.  Even her anger seemed sing songy.

"Gee... this is awkward.   At least his former betrothed hasn't
shown up," Onion Lad said.
"Former betrothed?" Sing Along Lass said.
"I'm a soda jerk, I hear things," said Onion Lad.


I use the wooden chariot, that The Savior assures me is called a sled.
The chariot and I glide over the ice and snow.  The snow hits my
face.   Here I am, about to enter a battle that may determine the fate
of my people and I am enjoying myself in the snow.  Days pass in an
adrenaline filled daze.    The snow turns to sand and dust.  I cough.
Like he said it might, the chariot shatters on the rocks of the
mountain.   I fly off and roll for several feet.   I check myself for
bruises.  I am fine.
I hear the clip-clop of pougras, which The Savior said reminded him of
an Earth creature called horses.    The dorfs riding them don't look
to friendly.   They raise their blasters at me.

"If it isn't Emperor S'chok's favorite medicine man," said
the lead rider get off his horse.

He hands me a gun.  A predictably arrogant welp to raise his hands
against the mightiest mystic in the Dorfan empire.  The Savior's
words bring me strength.  I do not know his name, but I know I will
crush him.   It is my destiny.  I raise my gun to fire, but I am
already bleeding.   I feel my heart pounding in my chest and my
lifeblood leaving me.   I wonder to myself, how can this be.  The
savior himself said: "In the Beyond Time, you are a great hero.   We
wouldn't want to be late for your greatest battle, would we?"

"Why?  Why am I dying?" I gasp out.

Then I remember.  As much time as spend away from the tribes as the
great Shaman, I am still a Dorf.   A Dorf's greatest battle is always
their last one.


Marcia was surprised at how well she was taking this.  She was a
normal person and she was serving coffee and cookies to three members
of the greatest super hero team on the planet.  Sure, Vel had been a
member of the LNH, but he was just so casual about it.  He mowed the
lawns of her buildings.  Dorfness aside, he was just a normal guy.

"Look, for the third time, I don't know where he went.   He said
something about a doctor's appointment," she said.  "He takes
them every week.  He's seeing a shrink.  Don't know much beyond
"Vel is seeing a shrink?" Jen said.
"I didn't know that," Sing Along Lass said.
"There are things you tell a boss that you don't tell a lover,"
Marcia said.

Jen coughed.

"I don't know what your issues with Vel are, but that was just a
one time deal.   We were both a little tipsy and very vulnerable.
That's it.  I'm mean, for god's sake.  I'm thirty two years
old.  He's practically a kid.  When he was born, I was getting out of
elementary school," Marcia said.  "He was good though."

Jen and Carina gasped.

"You're thirty-two?  You looked like you're only twenty
eight," Jen said.  "I hope I look that good in my thirties."


The Doctor sat at his desk.   He stared back at Vel.   The young half
human looked distraught.   He knew he could make the young man's
problem go away.  The question was should he?  Given a few a moments,
he knew Vel would make the leap on his own.  Better to simply give a
few breadcrumbs to lead his way.

"Surely, this Marcia wasn't your first..." The Doctor said.
"No.  Of course not.   It was a woman Zara on Haven.  We were
betrothed at birth as part of Dorfan tradition.  We met when I was
about seventeen.  She didn't find my human nature... well,
pleasing," Vel said.
"How did this make you feel?"
"A little embarrassed and ashamed at first," Vel said.
"And how has this affected your subsequent relationships?"
"It hasn't.  Zara and I realized we weren't right for each
other.   We both went our separate ways in the desert, carrying nothing
one canteen and two cactus fruits and tried to survive for two
weeks," Vel said.  "Traditional Dorfan annulment rituals.  Go
"You did not answer my question."
"I guess... I guess when I was dating Carina I was afraid to show my
'alien' nature.   After the hunting incident with Jen, she saw my
fiercer self.   She was freaked out a little, but she learned to
understand it.   I think it kinda turns her on.  But.. but I panicked.
I'm human and I'm Dorf.  Everyone else I've ever met has wanted
me to be one or the other.   When I finally meet someone who wants me
to be both, to be myself, I push it away.   Because I'm not
comfortable with it... and I'm afraid I'll screw it up," Vel
"I see.  And this Marcia woman?"
"She's an acquaintance and former employer.   It was nothing.  Fun
nothing, but still nothing," Vel said.
"And Carina?"
"Over.  Completely."
"I wish knew.  I know what I want.   I've always been curious
about zero gravity..." Vel said.

Sigmund Freud raised eyebrow.  "As interesting as that sounds, I'm
afraid our time is up.  I have another patient coming in.  Can you
please timeport out in the office rather than the waiting room?"
"You keeping secrets from me Doc," Vel said.
"Not exactly," Freud said.  "Need to know basis."
"Understood," Vel said.

Vel pulled the remote device from his pocket.   Within a few seconds,
he vanished.  Freud walked over to the door.   A young man in baseball
cap and Simpsons T-Shirt sat in the waiting room.

"Has he left yet?" the young man said.
"Yes.  Come on in Dran," Sigmund said.


Marcia heard a loud POP!   The four of them turned their heads.  Vel
was now standing in the middle of the room.  Sing Along Lass and
Seductress glared at him.   His eyes widened.

"What are you doing here?" Vel said.
"We came to talk to tell you about increased subspace activity
surrounding Haven," said Onion Lad.

Vel went over the factors in his head.

"Onion Lad, go home and help prep the troops.  If things go wrong,
the LNH should be on full alert.  The spatial range of this device is
limited to the nearest planet.  I have a call I'm going to have to
make if I'm going to make it to Haven," Vel said.
"I'm sure Stomper wouldn't mind if we took a cruiser or flight
thingee," Sing Along Lass said.
"I don't want the LNH getting involved with this.  It could get
messy," Vel said.
"What about us?" said Jen.  "We can help."
"Come or don't.  Makes little difference to me," he said.
"One question though.  Have you been studying those martial arts
programs I gave you?"

To be Continued...

Vel, Haz, Marcia, Dran and Vel created by Jesse N. Willey.   Sing Along
Lass created by Drizzt.  Jailbait created by Martin Phipps.    Onion
Lad created by Tom Russell Jnr and Dane Martin.  This document is
copyright Jesse N. Willey

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