[BP/MISC] Pointless Posting Man #2

drtimphd at gmail.com drtimphd at gmail.com
Mon Feb 21 20:47:20 PST 2005

                   Boring Publications Presents...

                     Pointless Posting Man #2

                            By Tim Munn


	Pointless Posting Man needed something to do. He'd nearly made several
pointless posts to quacksrus.net and apocalypse.info's message boards.
For once, he thought he'd try to make a post that had a point. So off
he went, to peruse Usenet and other various message boards, looking to
make a point. After several hours of searching, he gave up. He got
dressed into has pajamas and eagerly went to bed.

	Several hours later, he woke to one of the nastiest dreams he'd ever
had. He was printing off reams of paper for some unknown reason. When
he looked at the paper, it was post after post to Usenet from himself.
Unlike most of his postings, these made a point. Pointless Posting Man
could not believe it. He got up, and was going to remedy this nightmare
in the best way he could. He was going to make a post that had a point,
one way or the other!

	Pointless Posting Man quickly went to work. He made a pointless post
to brainpainrelief.org. No! Only the pointless posts were coming to
mind! He smacked himself over his head several times, only able to give
himself brain pain. That's it! He went back to brainpainrelief.org, but
unfortunately for Pointless Posting Man, another pointless post was

	There was no hope in making a post with a point! Pointless Posting Man
walked out of his home, quite depressed. A post with a point could not
be made tonight, nor could ever be made it seemed. He wearily entered
the local 24/7/365 Internet Cafe. Perhaps here he could make the Post
With A Point. Pointless Posting Man sat at the nearest table, flipping
the monitor up and on. A waiter eyed him cautiously before arriving at
his table.

	"You look stupid," the waiter said in a blur.

	Pointless Posting Man pointed out his selection on the menu, as he had
a frog in his throat. The waiter was unamused by his actions, giving
Pointless Posting Man the Evil Eye. Silly waiter, Pointless Posting Man
thought, you're tricks are for losers and freaks. He proceeded to
connect to the internet via the Internet Cafe's high speed connection.
Moments later Pointless Posting Man slammed hi fist into the table.
Message Boards and Usenet were censored in the Internet Cafe! Where
were the Free Speech Activists when you needed them?! Message Boards
and Usenet being censored also hampered people's rights to expression!
The humanity!

	"There he is," the waiter returned, this time with a police officer.
"He's the one wearing pajama's in public. You evil man!" He said in a
high-pitched voice.

	Pointless Posting Man's jaw dropped, as Officer Malone took his billy
club from its customized sheath. Malone's polarized sunglasses
reflected Pointless Posting Man's image back to himself. I look freaked
out, Pointless Posting Man thought. Malone raised the club and stopped
in mid air. He smiled a bit.

	"Are you ready? From what I understand, this hurts when it goes to
places it shouldn't go," he said laughing. He brought the club down-

	Pointless Posting Man jerked awake from the nightmare screaming like a
girl. It was only a nightmare, and a sick and twisted one at that. He
took in a couple of deep breaths after taking mental note of the dream.
He'd found the perfect topic to make his point with. In a few hours,
and after a good night's sleep, he'd post his nightmare to
dreamdeconstructor.com. Pointless Posting Man was happy once more as he
laid his head on his pillow. He could not get comfortable however, and
fluffed his pillow. Pointless Posting Man picked up his pillow, and
lying there, innocent-like, was Officer Malone's Billy Club.

	"Are you ready?" Officer Malone asked. Pointless Posting Man screamed
once more like a girl. He raised up the billy club and swung away...

	Copyright 2/21/2005 Tim Munn

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