[LNH2] Ultimate Ninja 2020 #2

Martin Phipps phippsmartin at hotmail.com
Fri Aug 27 08:17:38 PDT 2004

                    Ultimate Ninja 2020#2
                               Pay Day

2020.  The future.  LNH HQ.

  "On your right is the med lab," Organic Girl told
the tour going through LNH HQ, "and on your left are
the LNH's various scientific laboratories."
  "Which room contains the time portation device?" she
was asked.
  "Oh, I'm sorry," she said.  "The time portation
device is off limits."
  "I just want to take a look at it.  I would have
thought it would have been included on the tour.  How
many of us have actually seen a machine that can
enable us to travel through time."
  "Well... I don't know."
  "Could we just get a glimpse of it?"
  "Alright."  She opened the laboratory door.  "There
it is."
  "Thank you."  Jerry Michaels touched the rim of his
glasses and activated the hidden digital camera hidden
in the frame.
  "Alright then," Organic Girl said, continuing the
tour.  "Over there is Johnny Stomper's office and
around the corner we have living quarters ..."

  "Okay?  Are you ready?" VAMMO Girl asked.
  "Sure!" Major Marvel said.
  "I guess so," Penultimate Ninja said.
  "Alright then!  Ladies and gentlemen, I give you...
Pocket Man Junior!"
  Sarcastic Boy walked out of his bedroom wearing his
father's old uniform.  "Well... what do you think?"
  "I think it's great!" VAMMO Girl said.
  "It looks fine!" Major Marvel said.
  "It looks kinda dorky," Penultimate Ninja said.
  "Well, yeah," Sarcastic Boy admitted.  "It was made
way back in the twentieth century.  It isn't exactly
what's in style now."
  "Superhero costumes aren't supposed to be stylish,"
VAMMO Girl pointed out.  "Would you walk around
wearing a superman costume?"
  "That's true," Sarcastic Boy said.
  "And yet you and Major Marvel look great in your
costumes!" Penultimate Ninja pointed out.
  "Thank you!" they both said.
  "But that's every man's fantasy," Sarcastic Boy
admitted.  "To see women walking around in skin tight
  "Or nothing at all," Penultimate Ninja said.
  "Alright."  Sarcastic Boy turned and posed for VAMMO
Girl.  "Be honest!  What do you think?"
  "I _am_ being honest," VAMMO Girl said.  "I really
do think you look great!"
  "Well then that's all that matters!"
  "Hmmph!" Penultimate Ninja said.
  "What's with you today?" Major Marvel asked him.
  Penultimate Ninja nodded.  "I'm sorry.  It's just
that I had an argument with Ultimate Ninja yesterday."
  "What about?"
  "What do you mean?"
  "He doesn't think I should spend time with my
friends if I want to become a ninja warrier."
  "He said that?"
  "Basically, yeah."
  "That just doesn't sound fair," Sarcastic Boy said.
  "Fair or not, that's what he said."
  "So what did you tell him?" VAMMO Girl asked.
  "I told him that I didn't want to be a ninja warrier
  "I suppose it's your decision," Major Marvel said,
"but I wouldn't want you to give up your dreams just
like that."
  "Yeah," Sarcastic Boy said.  "You've been working
really hard."
  "He didn't seem to think so," Penultimate Ninja
  "Well, you know," VAMMO Girl said, "you don't seem
happy with this decision.  Maybe you should go talk to
  "And say what?"
  "Couldn't we just get together on weekends?" Major
Marvel suggested.
  Penultimate Ninja thought for a moment.  "Would that
be okay with you?"
  "I mean, it's not that I don't _want_ to spend more
time with you..."
  "No, no, I understand."
  Penultimate Ninja nodded.  "Alright.  I'll talk to

  "That's it?" Mr. Underling asked.  "That's all you
  Jerry Michaels looked his immediate superior at
Conspiracy Corporation directly in the eye.  "This
will be enough."
  "It's hard to believe," Mr. Bossman said, waving one
of the photographic prints that Jerry Michaels had
made up from the pictures he had taken at LNH HQ the
day before.  "You're going to be able to reconstruct
their time portation device just from these pictures?"
  "It's what I do," Jerry said.
  Mr. Underling laughed and rolled his eyes.

  "i wRecked anotheR Robot, Right?"
  Ultimate Ninja sighed.  aLLiterative Lad had indeed
destroyed another of the peril room's combat robots.
aLLiterative Lad's abilities were improving on a daily
basis.  He was the most naturally gifted fighter he
had ever met.  For a moment, he worried that
aLLiterative Lad might grow up to be unstoppable.
With the image of a fully grown, undefeated
aLLiterative Lad having crystalized in his mind's eye,
Ultimate Ninja felt a distinct sense of pride.  He
then scolded himself for wanting to turn this young,
innocent boy into a living weapon.  aLLiterative Lad
was too young to decide that that's what he wanted to
be when he grew up and Ultimate Ninja certainly didn't
have the right to decide for him.
  "Am I interrupting?" Penultimate Ninja asked.
  "We just finished," Ultimate Ninja told him.
  "Look," Penultimate Ninja said, "Mr. Ninja...
  Ultimate Ninja laughed.  Penultimate Ninja would
usually just come out and say whatever was on his mind
and do so very rudely.  Now, he was overcompensating
for that.  Ultimate  Ninja decided he would just let
the boy finish what he had to say rather than
discourage him from trying to choose his words more
  "About the other day... you are the master and I am
only a student so... I'm sorry..."
  "You told me you didn't want my training anymore."
  "Right.  I said that.  Look, I don't want to argue
with you.  If you don't want me as a student anymore
then I'll just go."
  "I didn't say that."
  "Then what are you...?  Sorry.  Go on.  You were
  "Nothing."  Ultimate Ninja thought for a moment.
"You came here to talk to me.  What do _you_ have to
say to _me_?"
  "Right.  I guess I am sorry I came late the other
day.  If you have me back as a student then I promise
it won't happen again."
  "I see."  Ultimate Ninja sighed. "To be honest, I
don't think you have the aptitude that aLLiterative
Lad here has.  I doubt if you will ever attain the
level of skill that he has already attained, let alone
the level of skill that I have attained."
  "But if you do come to my training sessions on time
and you do make a genuine effort to follow my
teachings then, well, you are welcome to try to prove
me wrong."
  "Fair enough."  Penultimate Ninja offered his hand.
Ultimate Ninja reluctantly agreed to shake his hand.
A handshake is the way equals seal an agreement.  It
would have been more proper for him to bow before his
master.  "Next time I will expect you to beg for my
  "There won't be a next time!  I give my word!"
  "We'll see."

A few months later...


  Kenny Mnemonic opened his eyes and tried to get his
bearings.  He had gotten home late the evening before
and didn't get to bed until well after midnight.  He
hoped it wasn't still early in the night, that nobody
had been rude enough to call him at 3:00 in the
morning.  He checked his clock.  It was actually 2:37.
"This had better be important he muttered to
himself."  He picked up the phone.  "What's up?" he
  "I did it!"
  "I've done it?"
  "What have you done?"
  "The time portation device.  I wanted to tell
someone right away.  I've done it!"
  "Right.  Look, Jerry, if you've _really_ discovered
a way to travel through time then why didn't you
travel back in time and tell me yesterday evening
_before_ I went to bed?"  He hung up the phone.
"Idiot."  Luckily for Kenny, he was able to drift off
to sleep again easily enough.  The time portation
device was Jerry's concern, not his.  If Jerry had
managed to get it to work, fine, but he still had to
convince his bosses at Conspiracy Corporation that it
worked the way he said it did.

NEXT: The Retcon Effect

Kenny Mnemonic, Jerry Michaels, Mr. Bossman, Mr.
Underling, Penultimate Ninja, Sarcastic Lad, VAMMO
Girl, Major Marvel, Organic Girl and aLLiterative Lad
created by me.

Pocket Man created by Gary St. Lawrence.

Conspiracy Corporation created by Jessica

Ultimate Ninja created by Raymond "wReam" Bingham.


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