SG: Subtler Than Light #3 (2/2): Doing Here?

[Gary W. Olson]

(continued from part one, preceding...)

***

Lemon's head buzzed as he walked side-by-side with Cendra Seconds down the
ornate bronze-gold corridor. They had to pick their way past palm trees,
flower pots, and ferns that had been knocked from their decorative niches
by the force of the blast. Lemon studied Cendra's face through side-eye
glances, and knew that she was doing the same to him. He touched the songs,
whirling deep in his head, assuring himself without hearing them that they
were still there and doing their work, keeping telepathic probes out and
incriminating thoughts in.

He wondered if Cendra enjoyed returning to their long-running fray as much
as he did.

"The Doc seems to have gotten... more intense... since last time I was
here," he opened. "I don't suppose he finally figured out how to grind
nectarisite into powder and snort it."

"He did that last year," Cendra answered, as they reached a hatch. "Says he
'saw Cibola'... at least until Esteban and Coco hoovered the particles out
through his nose, and Erin... that's Dr. McCavish to you... worked some
techno-magic and healed up the damage. First day on the job."

"He's a techno-mage?"

"I was being facetious," she replied, giving him an annoyed glance. "He's
just really good with tech, like his father, and doctoring in general, like
his mother. Not a literal techno-mage, like your sister."

"Lucky there," said Lemon. "If Bonnie'd had to use her phone on him... the
Doc's nose'd be a tentacle or something."

"I'm not sure Dr. Gigawatt would mind that." She shook her head. "He's gone
so far down his rabbit hole of choice, he doesn't know what way 'up' is
anymore. Bhossi, Cla'rabhelle, Shelby... they do a mix of containing him,
interpreting him, and irresponsibly encouraging him, but they can only
follow his train of thought through so many track switches."

"And what he said about the different kinds of crises...?"

"Worry the hell out of us," Cendra answered, as she opened the hatch,
revealing two tubes, each with a ladder. "In general, headache-inducing,
mostly-un-actionably vague ways. It's why we chose to re-bury the Heart
soon after... the incident."

Lemon grimaced. She didn't need to elaborate, though her eyes threatened
she was about to.

She stepped into the rightmost tube, which had a downward-pointing red
arrow painted next to its entrance, but didn't grasp the ladder. Instead,
she hovered in front of it, and used a wall-hold to spin around to face him.

"Looks like the anti-grav field is functioning again," she said as she
began to slowly descend. "Care to try it out?"

"You got it to work?" Lemon asked, pushing into the shaft. He looked down
at his black shoes, which hung above nothingness. The science lab was on
the 4th level, one below the bridge, so there was a lot of nothingness
between his feet and the bronze-gold floor.

"The Heart restored functionality to the Root, but only when we reburied
it," Cendra replied, as they slowly sank. "When we did that, a lot of
things came online that we'd been struggling with. The old
unplug-it-and-plug-it-back-in principle, we think, and some subsystems,
like this, now work fine, even with the Heart gone again. Sadly, the effect
didn't reach to the ship's engines. We're as landlocked as ever."

"Wish I'd been there to see it."

"You're the only one."

"Ouch," he said, giving the word a drollness he didn't feel. "Were you
saving that one up, or am I rubbing off on you?"

They touched down on the bronze-gold circle at the bottom of the shaft. The
hatch slid open.

"Let's say it's a natural talent you help me refine whenever you open your
pretty boy mouth," Cendra said. She held up a hand to forestall a response,
then waved it in the direction of the hatch. "First floor, lobby,
cafeteria, one-way getting-the-fuck-out access for all M.I.B. agents."

"And if the Director wants to meet you here...?"

"I'll burn that bridge when I come to it."

Lemon stepped out into the lobby. It had been empty when he and Cendra had
come in earlier, it's hotel-esque expanse of who's-gonna-actually-sit-here
rows of cushioned seats and strategically-deployed ferns and bonsai trees
seemingly unchanged from the day he'd left, just seven years before. The
reception desk was still uncrewed, though he saw shadows of people moving
in the office in the back.

The lights were low, so it took a moment for Lemon to realize the lobby was
no longer empty. The young, beige-skinned, blue-haired man in black track
shorts Lemon had contended with in the bookstore just that morning was
there, shirtless and grimacing as the young, well-tanned blonde woman Lemon
had contended with all his life waved her smartphone over his bleeding
shoulder and frowned.

"There's a... flatness... to your aura," Bonnie Rydell said. "Maybe even a
'squatness,' if that makes any sense. It's throwing off the repair mites
I'm projecting. Hold still, I'll try a filter." A giant sombrero appeared
above the man's head. Bonnie giggled, then pressed more buttons. The
sombrero disappeared. "Okay, that got it, I think."

"I'm half... Heliumian," said Johnny Clark, briefly grimacing as the light
from Bonnie's phone flashlight changed from white to chartreuse. "There was
a girl back at the Acadley who said that explained a lot."

"And what was the explanation?"

"Dunno," he replied. "We were too busy making out in a hot tub to get into
it, and never together long enough for it to come up again."

"Hello, Bonnie," said Cendra. Lemon half-expected to see his sister jump at
Cendra's voice, but Bonnie just glanced at her and nodded.

"You never told me you knew a Heliumian," she said. "There's almost no data
on them to work with. Never mind
half-Heliumian/half-radioactive-spam-irridated-humans. It's giving the
online grimoires I subscribe to what-for."

"Johnny, you should go up and see Erin," Cendra said. "He's through his
line of patients now, and the crew's got what cleanup and repair work is
left in hand."

"Already saw him," Johnny said. "He ran me through the Autodoc again.
Remember last year, when he talked me into letting it give me a physical?
Same thing again. It wrote 'NO U' in every box, including name and address.
You'd think it was any of my exes."

"I am getting some results, though," said Bonnie. "The energy Kazza Malissk
zapped you with isn't magical, but there are records of it on murder
victims from the 1800s. Dankar Rukh, the Sorcerer Superlative of the late
19th, kept some detailed notes from his investigations. And... it's tied in
some way to the Heliumian part of your D.N.A. Which may explain why it
could break your skin and do you a damage, though I can't tell you more
beyond that." She showed Johnny the screen. "If you want to come back to
the bookstore, I could work you over in more detail..."

"That's the line Miguel fell for, right?" Lemon asked.

Bonnie glared at him. Lemon half-expected her to try to smite him via Alexa
again, as she had in the bookstore, despite not having the smiting hardware
at hand.

"That's... in the past," said Cendra, though her tone indicated it wasn't
out of thought's reach. "Thank you, Bonnie, for looking after him. I
thought you two had met before."

"You don't invite me to anything," said Bonnie. "Something something
homewrecker, I think's how it goes."

"You weren't the wrecker," Cendra said. "Just the ball. And if someone
could just stop pushing buttons for a second..." She shot Lemon a fierce
look. "...we can keep this civil. Deal?"

"I love me some civil," said Bonnie, looking back at her phone. "Okay,
Johnny, the mites are miting. They can't do the repairs directly, of
course, on account of your super-durability, but they've found an in to
spurring your healing process. Oddly, that didn't come from any of my
online grimoires. But I cross-referenced other libraries. Let's see...
looks like the central driver here is... a... Hormel cookbook from the
fifties." She furrowed her brow. "Magic and spam don't mix that well.
Unless by 'well' you mean 'explode.' Maybe that's it. The mites are trying
a recipe on your radioactive-spam-irridated-human side."

"You don't say ham, you say Spam," Johnny warbled, then blinked.
"Thanks...?" he added.

"You're welcome," said Bonnie, giving him a wide smile. "It was nice
meeting you."

"Same," Johnny answered, as he stood, looking from Bonnie to Cendra and
finally to Lemon. He frowned, as if remembering something. "Ah... did I
miss something? Why is *he* doing here?"

"A question everybody asks, sooner or later," said Lemon, before Cendra
could say anything tart. "I was brought aboard for a limited exchange of
information, and exploring a potential alliance to get the Heart of Mu
back. Cendra may not like me any more than you, which is still more than my
sister, but she's practical enough to bend when things of importance are at
stake."

Bonnie raised an eyebrow at Cendra, and hefted her smartphone. "As a token
of goodwill, I can set his underwear on fire."

"Now that's what I call common ground," Cendra said.

"Ha!" Lemon ha'd at them. "Jokes on you! I'm not wearing any!"

"How did you stand growing up with him?" Cendra asked through a scowl.

"Mystic clay makes good earplugs," Bonnie replied, giving Lemon a
sour-but-unsurprised eye.

"Sounds like my cue to go," said Johnny, regarding them all with a look of
polite panic. "Anything you need me to help out with around here, Cendra,
or can I head up to see if I can help out with the repair efforts?"

"Go," said Cendra. "And find a shirt while you're at it."

Johnny stepped toward the 'up' lift tube... and stepped briskly out of the
way when China Moroboshi and Shelby d'Rodang emerged from the 'down' tube.

"Mmmmmammals," said Shelby. His clawed hands held a lot of portable
instruments of uncertain purpose, so in lieu of tipping his trilby he
settled for a suave nod. Johnny shook his head, entered the lift, and
ascended out of sight. Cendra rolled her eyes, and Bonnie just raised an
eyebrow. Lemon gave the human-sized kaiju a respectful nod, and noted the
quick flash of surprise in response.

"We're heading out to the park in Little Kaijuville where Esteban fought
with the Programmer this morning," said China, as she tapped at a tablet in
her hand. "I've got an idea that it's more than a coincidence that they
went there to examine what they thought they stole... oh, hi, Lemon. Like
the suit. You ever gonna return that 'Waking Life' DVD you lifted off me?"

"Hi, thanks," said Lemon, "and the last I saw of it was in a dive bar in
Santiago, where the bartender generously accepted it in lieu of full
payment on my tab."

"The last day you were in Santiago, amirite," she said, smirking a bit.
Lemon couldn't help but smirk a bit in response. China never seemed to get
flustered by anything he said or did, something he used to find
exasperating, but today felt like a balm in his still-aching head.

"You know me well," he answered. "Or, at least better than the bartender
did."

"Can we get going?" Shelby asked. "Moon Moon, Marty, Miko, and Apples are
already on-site, trying to keep the bums in the park from trampling or
eating things that could be evidence."

"I wanted to ask," said China, turning to Cendra. "Can Miguel be spared to
come along? Moon Moon and the rest want to see him. Something something
pack business ahwoooo. Also I put in a call to Zia to see if she could join
us and do a thaumaturgic reading, see if there's something we can pick up,
and I'd like to give her a level up on clearance for it so I don't have to
be coy about what we're trying to find."

Lemon tried to remember anyone from the _Subtler Than Light_ team named
Zia. Not in any of the briefings, he decided, or his memories of the dim
past.

"Level her up," said Cendra. "Though about Miguel... I was thinking of
having him get out to Malaga to check with Ragna on this new Galaxy Hunter
that showed up. Maybe also the superguy who showed up with him... Psywave,
whatshername. There's something... I don't know. Not so much something that
doesn't add up, but more like they're a math assignment from a different
chapter. Miguel knows everyone who's down there... well, most everybody,
since there're still some offworlders helping with cleaning up after this
year's Burning M00se, so he can ask others if Ragna already went back to
planet Hottentot."

"I thought you wanted him to take Camila out of here," said Bonnie. "At
least until we're secure against teleporting demon monkey incursions." She
gave Lemon a disdainful look.

"Not *my* demon monkeys," he reminded her. "Only somewhat my demon circus."

Bonnie sighed and looked away.

"Bhossi and Cla'rabhelle have un-mothballed the teleportation inhibitor,"
said Shelby. "They're running diagnostic checks on it now. Without the
Heart, though, it might not be effective, and even more of an energy drain
than before." He looked at Lemon. "Unless our temporary friend here can
spare an agent from his detail to help us test...?"

"You got it," said Lemon, hiding a smile. He noticed Cendra's narrowed eyes
and shrugged. "If we're going to work together, I gotta make a concession
or two, right? Count this as one." He paused, wheels spinning in his head,
somewhere beneath the songs. "And if you want to go for two... I could go
out to Malaga. I mean, I grew up there, at least part-time."

"Hard no on that," said Cendra. "At least, not you alone." She shook her
head. "So soft no, I guess. I can't believe I'm even considering it. After
everything. China, are you still seeing those two little fuckers?"

"Little fuckers are not present," China said, tapping on her tablet as she
spoke, and not helpfully clarifying to Lemon just who and what she was
talking about. "I tried singing the 'Ulysses 31' theme in the lift tube,
and they didn't join in. Ergo, not here, and you're not being
uncharacteristically super-impulsive in giving ground on working with him,
he's just being charming."

"The bag my guys were trying to put the Heart in," said Lemon, "was
supposed to inhibit its effects. Erasmus Fancy's design, I'm told, same
kind of work he put into the mask he used to wear. So either Kazza's well
out of range, or the Heart's bagged and it works."

"Whee," said Shelby, a decidedly non-whee tone in his voice. "Can we go?"

"I'll talk to Miguel," Cendra said to China. "Don't wait up, though."

"Roger dodger," China said, bagging her tablet and adjusting her black
t-shirt, which bore art of attacking flying saucers, palm trees, and the
words 'Hollywood Burns.' Lemon guessed it was a band, not a hope. "We'll
report in when we're on-site."

Shelby went by and through the door to the street. As China passed by
Lemon, she said, sotto voce, "try stepping to us and I'll let the Kyoko in
me out to play."

"Love you too," said Lemon, unsure of exactly what the threat was but
feeling a chill nevertheless. China winked and stepped out.

"I can go to Malaga," said Bonnie. She shot Lemon a look. "I grew up there,
too, and unlike him, most of the people there still like me."

"I appreciate the offer," Cendra answered, rubbing her eyes. "But Miguel
can get there faster in--"

"I'll call a Tuber," Bonnie interrupted. She held up her smartphone, and
pointed at the image of a potato icon. "Get me and Miguel and whoever else
you want to send... and even my stupid brother, if you approve... on over
there in a flash."

"Tuber?" asked Lemon.

"Translocation service," said Bonnie, as she tapped the icon, which opened
up into a white screen with a map and a row of meaningless-to-him symbols.
"I put in the request, a couple magical contractors pop in, zip zap zop,
we're there." She sighed. "Expensive, though. You'd think they'd give me a
break since I helped debug the Android version of the app."

"And... I'm guessing not everyone can use this," said Cendra.

"You gotta have a special version of any of the major modern smartphones,
hardened to handle the thaumaturgic surges that play holy hell with the
regular versions," Bonnie told him. "They're only available to magic-y
peeps. Special hush-hush sections on Amazon and Apple Store, among others.
The High Technocrus... the accredited mage who's the embodiment of the
union of science and magic... comes down hard on cheaters. At least if they
don't give him a cut. He's kinda desperate for cash now, though, cuz he
bought the accreditation from the previous holder for all those billions,
and he's got a metric fuckton of thaumaturgic debt to service to keep the
universe from control-alt-deleting him."

"You can't mean..." Cendra said.

"Him," Bonnie confirmed. "He's not even remotely competent, sure, but he
hasn't wrecked the system... yet."

Lemon frowned, then pressed his mouth into a line. The mention of the High
Technocrus touched another memory. Something Director Cartier had once said
about a previous holder of the accreditation.

Something about him... and the Charnel House.

Terrors within. Terrors just *getting* to the terrors within.

And within the terrors within... a door. To...?

"Fine," said Cendra, interrupting Lemon's tenuous remembrance, waving at
Bonnie as if warding off her entire headache-threatening conversational
cul-de-sac. The thread he'd touched slipped away. "But let me talk to
Miguel first, see if he wants to go with you or out to the park." She fixed
her gaze on Lemon. "As for this... Agent... I'm leaving that call to you.
If you take him with, keep him on a short leash."

Bonnie grinned, and Lemon felt another chill. "I'll use the spiky collar,"
she said. "Inside out."

Lemon thought quickly. Finding Kazza Malissk before anyone else was the
priority. But... he wanted to know what a full-armored Galaxy Hunter was
doing on Earth as well. Ever since Ragna Rok retired and created the Hunter
Corps to replace him, there were hundreds of well-trained beings of many
races who were Galaxy Hunters, though so far as he and the M.I.B. knew,
none on active duty had come to Earth. There were Galaxy Hunters who were
Reptoids, he knew, and what Dr. Gigawatt had said about the crisis being
partly one of historical galactic intrigue involving them was no
coincidence. It was taking a chance, and a tricky one at that, since he'd
have to rely on Bonnie not stranding him in Malaga out of spite, though he
could make a couple of calls to mitigate the risk. The events of the day so
far made it clear he was far from seeing the whole picture of who was
competing with him for the Heart.

Director Cartier probably knew more than he was saying about them, too. If
there was one thing Lemon liked more than keeping secrets, it was working
out what secrets were being kept from him. No matter what consequences
followed.

Consequences always followed. They were why Lemon liked moving fast.

"I'm in," he said. "I just gotta get some instructions to my
guys--including detaching one and sending him here to help test the
teleport inhibitor--and I'll be back in ten."

"Aren't you forgetting something?" Cendra asked. Lemon noted the look on
her face, at once tense and smiling.

Then he heard a metallic step on the floor behind him, from the direction
of the still open door to the street.

"Damn," he whispered. Cendra had told him, and he'd tried to leave, but
there had always been something to see, someone to work, some words to say.
Had it been an hour, already?

"You were right, Cendra," said Esteban Veracruz, from behind him, "neither
Coco nor I can find this Kazza Malissk, and we covered twenty square miles.
She's got the Heart of Mu masked somehow, and... what's everyone looking..."

Lemon turned. When unable to escape facing consequences, it was best to do
it with a smile.

"...at?" Esteban squeaked.

The astonishment in his face was so pure Lemon could feel it... and it
hurt. And seeing the rest of him... hurt in a different way. He'd put on
muscle, and the exposed skin of his arms and face gleamed with the sweat of
flying around in the California sun. And the way he carried himself now...
Lemon remembered someone describing Esteban's gangly teenage self as 'a
collection of angles in search of geometry.'

He'd found it. That much was sure.

"Hey, Guerrero, skootch," said someone behind him. "You said the boss lady
here was looking for me."

Though Esteban had changed back to civilian guise--the half-an-armored-suit
he called 'Los Pantalones' having compressed and folded into a belt,
sandals, and armbands--the costumed, red-haired superguy behind him had to
squeeze between his arm and the doorway edge to get through. She stopped on
seeing Lemon.

"I saw you earlier," she said, after a moment's pause. "What are *you*
doing here?"

Lemon started to answer that familiar question, but stopped when she looked
up at Esteban, who met her look before returning to staring at Lemon. There
had been a look on his face in that moment, Lemon was sure. No, not just a
look... a communication. Somehow.

He wanted to look at Psywave, but couldn't pull his eyes from Esteban. He
wanted to speak... but the words ran dry. Inside his head, the songs
faltered.

Cendra blinked, a momentary look of surprise crossing her face.

"I always liked him," Bonnie said, not even trying to keep her voice down,
though she'd mimed covering her mouth as she spoke to Cendra. "The only one
I saw who could ever shut my brother up."

"Ms. Seconds," said Psywave. "Ran into your guy here while looking for
Kazza Malissk, and he said I ought to talk to you. I'd like to do it now so
I can get back to my partner and the search."

Cendra frowned. "I'm sure you mean well, Psywave," she said, "but I don't
know you from Sy Sperling, and I'd rather talk to Galaxy Hunter, if you
don't--"

"I'm the one who sent the warning the Heart was going to be stolen. Not
Hunter. Though I can put in a call."

Cendra pursed her lips, then came to a decision.

"My office, off the bridge," she said. "Call him, so I can interview you
both. I'll put in a temp clearance so your Hunter can land up top and not
get jumped by my people. But if you could just wait a few minutes..."

"No need to wait," said Esteban. His voice was cold, his eyes shadowed by
the light from outside. "I've got to get back to the search."

"Dude," Lemon managed to get out, his forced smile wavering. "You just said
you were done."

"I'm sure I don't have to tell you," Esteban went on, "but don't believe a
damn word this guy says."

He lifted two fingers to his mouth and blew a mock kiss at Lemon.

Then he stepped back through the doorway, Los Pantalones reforming over his
legs and hips while his bronze-gold mask that was once Erasmus Fancy's
dropped from his headband.

He shot upward and was gone.

Lemon heard people talking behind him. He saw Psywave move off with Cendra.

But he couldn't move. Couldn't speak. Couldn't *think.*

("And what effect has the awakened Heart had on *you,* Agent?")


WILL AGENT RYDELL RECOVER IN TIME TO GO TO MALAGA?

WILL CENDRA SECONDS UNRAVEL THE MYSTERIES UNSPOOLING BEFORE HER?

WILL THE HEART OF MU KEEP MUCKING WITH EVERYBODY'S HEADS?

WILL DR. GIGAWATT KEEP DRAINING THE _STL'S_ YARN BUDGET?

WHAT WAS LEMON ON THE VERGE OF REMEMBERING ABOUT THE CHARNEL HOUSE?

WHAT IS THE CHARNEL HOUSE, ANYWAY?

WILL TONY THE FLESH-EATING SPORE CLOUD EVER FIND LOVE, OR AT LEAST
BREAKFAST?

WILL ANYONE SAY HAM INSTEAD OF SPAM?


Find out on an upcoming... you don't say guy, you say SUPERGUY!
--
Subtler Than Light #3 (c) 2023 by Gary W. Olson. All Rights Reserved.

For behind-the-scenes notes on this episode, visit my posting in
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https://superguy-list.livejournal.com/41360.html

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